5 years ago by

I wanted to write you a hilarious post about summer Instagram use (I swear, it would have been so funny. Next time…), but instead I felt like giving you a real update.

And when I opened my Instagram, I saw this quote:

“The important thing is this: to be able, at any moment, to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.” By Maharishi Mahesh Yogi.

I don’t really know who he was (after Googling, it looks like he was the guru of the Beatles, among others) but his words really resonated with me.

It’s so great and strange to be able to document your own life. Especially when you try to be authentic and don’t say too much nonsense like “everything is amazing, we’re laughing so hard over here with our perfectly thin bodies!” – and you try to stay true to yourself.

Especially when you go through profound changes and you don’t even recognize yourself.

In three years’ time, without making any sensational announcements, I slowly left the world of fashion shows (I just couldn’t do it anymore), I fell in love (yeesssss), tried to get pregnant (it didn’t work), changed cities (finally!), bought a house (one of my life’s dreams) and on the inside, I went through a kind of revolution that I think I can finally (well, I hope, anyway, because revolutions are exhausting) look back at.

It’s strange how we can get stuck on an image of ourselves. Often, when we’re young, we say: “I want to find my place in the world!” That’s good. But once you’ve found it, sometimes you get stuck there. So be careful not to find too much of a place.

I think I was kind of paralyzed by my place, in a way.

By the things people expected of me – well, mostly by what I thought people expected of me.

For example, I thought my loyalty to you, my readers, had to be impeccable.

I thought I had to continue posting here regularly, no matter what happened in my life. For a long time, that regularity was a great exercise for me, pushing me past the limits of my creativity and shyness.

If I got sick? No worries, dig down deep and find something to write. Devastated by a breakup, a health problem? No worries, just keep going. It was like how I kept going to fashion shows even after I was really tired of it. Or how I stayed in some relationships long after their expiration date.

I think I had such a desire to be the good girl who does everything right, and to prove I deserved the success I’d achieved, that I lost track of what I really wanted, and what really made me happy.

That led to a lot of different things. I didn’t feel good, and that’s probably why my friendships were shaky, I made some not-so-great life choices, gained an uncomfortable amount of weight, my inner monologues weren’t the best…the list is endless. For a long time, I tried to address the symptoms (come on, you have to exercise, come on, you have to meet more people, come on, you have to work a little more) without ever getting to the root of the problem.

At one point, I had gotten so used to trying to do things “the right way,” I couldn’t even make a decision by myself anymore. I was looking on the outside to tell me what I was supposed to want.

I want to talk to you about that, because I think it happens to women pretty often.

We have the ability to push ourselves past our limits and to be self-sacrificing, which can be wonderful, but also toxic.

And we can take that really far, and it can make us incredibly unhappy. But the truth is, these days, we will all live more than one life.

We need to redefine the idea of “finding our place,” the different paths to getting there, and what it means to have a career. Give ourselves the freedom to have some downtime.

And we shouldn’t hesitate to let go of the person we used to be to make room for the one we could become.

And as I’ve said before, we need to demystify the notion of “success.” Nothing bugs me more than the model of success presented to women these days. Under the guise of pushing us to feel “fulfilled,” it tells us we have to be completely photogenic (from head to toe, in addition to having a perfect house and perfect vacation, and with social media, nothing really belongs to us anymore), we have to be a doting mother, a paragon of health, and of course, have an absolutely thrilling career. All the while being politically correct, a feminist, and a philanthropist.

In my opinion, trying to force yourself into that mold is the complete opposite of success.

Having a perfect life is an exhausting and often lonely work.

Relaxing and pursuing what makes you happy, on the other hand, that’s when it gets interesting.

Connecting with your real desires sounds very cliché, and it can be super frustrating because it’s probably the hardest thing to do when you’ve always been taught to please others, whether it’s your parents, your friends, your partners or society in general.

But it’s worth a try, even if you just take it one step at a time.

(Which is actually one of the reasons why I love Guillaume Canet’s film Rock’n Roll, it’s on iTunes if you haven’t seen it).

So sometimes it’s important to get a little out of place. And not do what is expected of us. To surprise people, disappoint them, break things off, make mistakes, and live your life.

Oh, and before I go, I also wanted to say: whatever you do, whether you’re really in tune with yourself or not, there’s never a moment when you finally “make it” and you can just let go of everything because you’re “perfectly happy.” Life is so much bigger than clichés, life is a journey.


OK, I’m not going to get into the details of my private life today (but I will soon). I just wanted to give you a real update, because you’ve been asking me for one for a while. Thanks for checking in, by the way, it warms my heart!

Translated by Andrea Perdue


Add yours
  • Bises Garance! T’as l’air en effet de plus en plus en accord avec toi-même… si on pouvait tous en arriver là…

  • J’avoue que c’est pas mal de travail, en fait!!! Merci en tout cas!

  • Cristina July, 11 2017, 9:47 / Reply

    This feels good. I missed your personal voice. I can’t wait for more, if you feel like sharing

  • Yes I do now, I’ve been writing and I’ll keep you updated :)

  • camille reddress July, 11 2017, 9:50 / Reply

    your honesty is so moving and encourages us all to be ourselves . can’t thank you enough x sending huge love

  • Merci beaucoup

  • Martina July, 11 2017, 9:53 / Reply


  • Charlotte July, 11 2017, 10:07 / Reply

    Mon dieu, je me suis fais la meme reflexion ce weekend. Je me suis fatiguee moi meme avec mes posts et grandes phrases de soeur courage..
    Je suis arrivee a un point ou les compliments ‘wow t’as l’ai tellement en forme avec le bebe, ta marque, retour au taf et le demenagement’! En fait j’avais envie de crier ‘mais non pas du tout c’est un illusion je galere comme tout le monde mais oui je suis heureuse’!
    En revanche, un truc super culcul mais qui m’a change la vie c’est une phrase de Charlotte dans Sex and the City “you don’t have to be happy all the time, but at least once a day” et ca permet de profiter de son bonheur qui est en fait partout. Happy drifting in your new you ;-)

  • Merci Charlotte, bon courage et warm hugs, je suis d’accord avec toi :)

  • ? exactly what I needed to read today

  • Such a true statement, “We have the ability to push ourselves past our limits and to be self-sacrificing, which can be wonderful, but also toxic.”

  • Merci pour ces nouvelles !

  • Yes, this feels good and we miss your voice. So very happy when we hear from you. Life is way too short not to be able to look up from our current day-to-day lives in work, pursuit or routine and evolve into a bigger or different part of self that promotes our inner health, creativity and dreams. We need to take care of that sparkle in our eyes and feel gratitude for all the blessings and people in our lives.


  • Merci garance, ça valait le coup d’attendre de tes news. J’aime beaucoup les personnes du studio qui font de supers articles mais ce qui me plait le plus c’est te lire, je pense tout simplement par-ce-que c’est ta création, ton bébé et que tu trouve toujours les mots pour t’adresser à nous. Bravo d’être honnête, on s’en fout je croit d’être aimer pour ce que l’on n’est pas vaut mieux être détester pour ce que l’on est réellement (citation de Kurt Cobain). Je me languis de passer l’été avec tes mots <3

  • J’adore la citation :)
    Merci Sihem!

  • Barbalala July, 11 2017, 10:34 / Reply

    Alors la… chapeau ! Tu as une “sagesse” qui bouscule les conventions, justement, c’est de cela dont tu parles. L’image que l’on veut donner aux autres, surtout via les réseaux sociaux aujourd’hui… on se la fabrique et on en est un peu esclave. Une phrase de k. Pancol dit cela : “quand vous composez, restez naturels, libres. N’essayez pas de paraître autre que ce que vous êtes. Prenez le risque de vous tromper pOur trouver ce que vous avez à dire. (Muchachas) merci pour ton éternelle honnêteté . On se retrouve beaucoup dans ce que tu écris, meme si nos univers sont très différents, tu as un langage universel , qui parle à nous toutes.

  • C’est tellement gentil. L’une des choses qui m’a toujours guidée c’est que je sais que l’intime est universel. Ça me donne du courage pour partager, même les choses pas faciles…

  • even harder than pursuing your desires seems to me to figure them out in first place

    that’s what failures, mis-steps and try-outs are for I guess

    Thank you again for words which are deeply connecting with my heart and my own thoughts

  • Thank you Maria, exactly. Looking for yourself for the moment is who you are, embrace it as much as you can, and try to not worry too much!

  • Thank-you for this, Garance. A very timely article. I have been struggling with who I want to become, as I’ve gotten a little older and realized that I am not the career-obsessed person I thought I was. I want so much more from life than a career. It’s been a slow process of acceptance and changing the way I think about “success.”

  • Alice, come live in LA ;) I finally found a place where people actually implement work / life balance. It’s pretty interesting and mind blowing to me!

  • is exactly I have been thinking about me for the last 1 month, thank you for beeing so honest!!

  • Romain Gary July, 11 2017, 10:49 / Reply

    the main reason for me to read your posts is the braveness you show in sharing with us the surprising path of your evolution as a human being, neither concealing obstacles nor false starts.
    It feels like you’re writing not to “your readers” but to each one of us, like we were real friends

  • Thank you. I hope to!

  • Kathleen Holliday July, 11 2017, 10:49 / Reply

    Thank you so much for your words, it is your personal voice I come here to read.
    Nothing against the Atelier but it does not interest me nearly as much as you do; nor is it remotely relevant to the life I am leading. I have completely changed everything in the past few months. I got married, left my career, moved to a new city and I am exploring my way into a new me. So this post is incredibly perfect today.

  • Good! It’s important to keep an open mind, we all shift and our sources of interest change and evolve. It’s actually a good thing. :)

  • And thank you for sharing one more time!

  • Ce texte me definit completement !
    “Un mal etre sourd que je n’arrivais pas a comprendre …….Quand on en comprend la (les) raison et qu’on arrive a la (les) surmonter, quelle liberte !

  • Hope we all become whoever makes us happiest. We listen to others, watch everything that is out there, but have the sense and courage to do what makes us happy, and contented. The idea of having it all is a myth. And once you’ve checked the boxes, even that does not result in happiness. So its ok to miss out on a few things, and still find happiness in others. Having children is great, but this mythical idea that it completes women needs to be addressed again and again. Women and men can feel “complete” in multiple ways, and its ok to not have everything!

  • Aparna : so much truth, and it’s been my path with so many lessons in the last year. I think I can say Im feeling great for the first time in a long time! Thank you!

  • Authenticity. The day I started to live by it, i finally found out what it meant to take care of myself, and guess what, people loved me more for it; as a result, I have enhanced relationships, friendships, because of it. And I feel happier even through warts and all. Thank you ever so much Garance, you do speak with your heart and inspire each time.

  • Love your site and the continuing evolution. I have been reading it daily since the beginning and continues to be the FIRST thing I read when I get to the studio everyday! :)

  • Garance, I would just like to thank you for this update, these little gems your write are why we love you so much. You have a real gift.

  • MERCI ! Tes mots font, comme toujours, tellement de bien… <3
    Je sauvegarde cet article pour le relire de temps en temps !

  • You are just the best, Garance. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I am 22 now and they have been accompanying me since I was 16. I didn’t get everything you talked about then, cause I was a teenager lost in drama, but as I grew up I am able to appreciate your articles and thoughts more and more.
    Your are so brave and so brilliant and I can’t start to express how much I appreciate you <3

  • Sunnyside July, 11 2017, 11:56 / Reply

    J’avais l’impression que tu te trainais un gros boulet (ton blog) et comme il faut financièrement survivre, tu en es devenue prisonnière. J’espère que ta nouvelle route et ta créativité t’orientent vers un ailleurs plus excitant où tu révèles une autre part de toi-même. Prendre des risques est essentiel à un certain moment.

  • Ce n’est pas vraiment ce qui s’est passé mais te sachant une fidèle lectrice je sais que tu exprimes quelque chose que tu as ressenti, meme si c’est un peu dur. L’argent n’a jamais été ma motivation pour continuer, mais trouver une nouvelle voix est définitivement un immense challenge. Je t’embrasse!

  • cynthia July, 11 2017, 12:01 / Reply

    Lovely sentiments and so true. Pregnancy didn’t happen for us either. But we adopted a glorious and gorgeous baby girl when she was three days old 17 years ago and haven’t looked back.
    We ended up adopting on the East Coast where we live, but met with and loved a great adoption lawyer in LA – David Radis.

  • Dear Cynthia, that’s amazing.Congratulations and thank you for sharing. Who knows what the future hold for me! :)

  • Hi Garance,

    It is so easy to get so swept up in your life and your image of how you should be, that you lose yourself. It may be a cliche, but life IS a journey, not a destination and it’s important to step back, take a breath, and observe every now and then.

    I do miss your posts and as an older member of your audience, am not so interested in much of what I’m seeing here lately (that’s okay, you have to focus on your core readers!). But your updates are little gifts that I enjoy and treasure whenever they appear.

  • Oh Garance you’ve done it again, your message has gone straight to my heart and made me tear up. Thank you for your honesty and willingness to confront real struggles. It’s what I appreciate most about your blog. I get so tired of the glossy coating on everything these days, it feels so fake and superficial. I am still trying to find my self and my authentic path post baby. My daughter is now five and a little dream come true, but I definitely lost my way during her younger years and felt overwhelmed by the amount I was trying to give. I am making an effort each day to address what I actually want and what makes me happy. It’s hard, I constantly fall into the trap of giving too much and caring for others first. Society demands so much from women and we are expected to do it all with grace and a smile on our face. You are amazing and it’s a real treat to share your journey, don’t ever stop being yourself! We will always love you : )

  • That’s the nicest thing ever. Thank you Cass and sending you all my courage to find yourself again! And hugs to your daughter!!!

  • As a fellow “good girl,” I empathize. I was talking to a friend whom I haven’t seen in ages. She is very bohemian and follows her heart in all things. Her authenticity has brought her a lot of success, though not so much materially. And she doesn’t care about materialism, so it’s fine. She is off on another adventure, and she told me “I’ve never been afraid of failure.” And I realized, I have always been afraid of failure, of letting down my parents, my friends… She inspired me yesterday to shake things up, and you have come along and repeated that message while it’s still ringing in my ears. Thank you.

  • Then that’s a sign! Run towards what excites you!!!!

  • Melanie Steinemann July, 11 2017, 12:59 / Reply

    So happy for you that you’ve had the courage to be true to yourself and slowly step away from fashion and pursue other interests. L.A. seems to agree with you!!

    I have just had the funniest discovery. I read all your posts and remember Chris mentioning that he had lived in Jacksonville, FL. I live just south in a beach community called Ponte Vedra. I just discovered that he played at my wedding.
    I had a hunch because he always seemed familiar, but I just looked it up online. Groove Pocket!! Anyway…I remember loving him and everyone still talks about what a great band I had at my wedding in (2002). I will look to see if I have any photos of him!!

  • So fun!!! Isn’t he the best!?

  • Garance,

    I’ve been struggling for a few years post-University for everything to ‘click’, to find the job I feel like I ‘should’ have, make a certain amount of money etc. It’s been a very paralyzing feeling, the pressure I feel (mostly from myself, let’s me honest) to do things a certain way. I’ve been trying to take more deep breaths, more walks by the ocean, be more reflective and in tune with myself so I can discover what I truly want, away from all the noise of ‘supposed to’. Basically, what I mean to say is thank you so much for always sharing and being open, it is a huge encouragement, you are endlessly inspirational to me!


  • Thank you Emma and good luck!!!

  • Evgeniya July, 12 2017, 1:59

    Dear Garance! It’s my first time i comment on blog posts and I really want to thank you for your honest thoughts. Nothing happens by accident, all the best ahead whatever you dream about. Big big hug from Russia. You are incredible!

  • Vanessa July, 11 2017, 1:12 / Reply

    Ah Garance, tres chère Garance, si loin et en même temps si proche. Tant de similitudes, et cette impression étrange de suivre un chemin parallèle. Pas pour la mode, pas pour ce blog, seulement pour la femme que je devine derrière. Celle qui aspire au bonheur, celle qui se trompe, celle qui pense un peu trop parfois, celle qui cherche à sortir de son propre esclavagisme, celle qui est une et tellement d’autres.. Mais surtout celle qui assume toujours tout de sa vie. Tu (je me permets) as raison de suivre ta voie interieure.

    ‘The journey is the reward.’

  • Merci, ça me touche beaucoup! Bien sûr que tu peux me dire tu! :)

  • Gabrielle July, 11 2017, 1:18 / Reply

    Merci pour les nouvelles, tu nous as manqué ici !!! Mais bien sûr c’est important de faire ce dont tu as besoin et revenir quand c’est le bon moment !

  • Teresa July, 11 2017, 1:21 / Reply

    Merci Garance pour ce post inspirant et plein de sincérité ! Ce changement dont tu parles, de ce voyage qui est la vie, ta vie, je crois que tes lecteurs l’ont perçu en lisant le blog au fil des années. Je suis ton blog depuis très longtemps, mais je n’avais jamais laissé de commentaires… Mais là, il fallait que je te le dise, tes mots me sont allés droit au coeur. Je ne te connais pas personnellement, mais là j’aurai envie de te prendre dans mes bras, comme je ferais avec une amie proche et de te dire tout simplement merci !

  • I’m a longtime reader and appreciate your openness — agreeing that so much content perpetuates this idea of “perfection.” Something that really doesn’t exist. That said, Atelier writers are prone to words like “effortless” in lifestyle stories, which strikes me as similar and I think it’s a bit of a contradiction. Something to consider.

  • Maddie July, 11 2017, 1:23 / Reply

    This and your book and what you’ve said in podcasts before rings so true for me. A lot of expectations from a young age and pressure to do the expected which made me so unhappy in my early career (law). After having kids and taking time off completely from that world I have no desire or interest to go back so am at that crossroad of what to do next, but with that worry of judgement always there and of letting people down. ?It’s really hard to shake. Well done to you Garance, you seem really happy x

  • Maartje July, 11 2017, 1:32 / Reply

    Thank you.

  • Thank you for this. You’ve seriously been one of the best mentors from afar. I’m so grateful for your voice in internet land! I felt like I couldn’t read it fast enough. Thanks for all the feels and reminding me it’s one step at a time. Also, writing this, “whatever you do, whether you’re really in tune with yourself or not, there’s never a moment when you finally “make it” and you can just let go of everything because you’re “perfectly happy.” Life is so much bigger than clichés, life is a journey” on a post it(or2) and putting it on my mirror along with my other affirmations!

    xo Janelle

  • You are the best Garance. I hope you one day realize how generous you have been with all of us! Thanks for the friendship French girl

  • Thank you Garance! I have loved and identified with you all through your journey (going wayyyy back to your street photography days ha!). And I think now more than ever! Thank you for sticking to your gut, taking the time to explore your most true self and being brave enough to share it with us all. xo.

  • Becoming myself is a full time job, SO MUCH WORK but so rewarding – i’m there with you! X

  • Garance, I have been reading you since you first started your blog on fashion when you were based in New York. While about your life, you have also expressed sentiments of so many women. Well done! We expect so much of ourselves as we see ourselves in a light of comparison to others. To let go of expectations in that intense way that many of us have lived our lives…is a blessing. Thank you for being the authentic presence you are as someone whose work it is a joy for me to read. My own writings–while in a different voice–also reflect the journey we find ourselves on, together. Thank you, Garance.

  • J’allais t’écrire un pavé puis au final en une ligne :

    “C’est en se plantant Ben… qu’une plante pousse …” à son rythme… unique …

    Au plaisir de te lire Garance :)!

    Shérine , qui ne sait être Que Shérine … illimitée … et qui se plaaaaante grave depuis un bon moment déjà ;)

  • Dear Garance
    Thanks to be so honest ! I think it’s difficult to leave a good live when you feel that it’s not yours anymore. It’s a kind of neverending process. Everybody speaks about goals and getting the happyness, but sometime it’s only about learning, knowing ourself and getting experiences. The richer you feel the more you realices you’re living, especially after the difficult experiences. A big hug !!

  • lablune July, 11 2017, 2:39 / Reply

    De l’amour en barre. Merci !

  • catherine July, 11 2017, 2:47 / Reply

    Mais Garance qui veux tu devenir? que tu ne sois déjà?

  • Benedicte July, 11 2017, 3:01 / Reply

    Tes propos sont rafraichissants. J’ai toujours détesté cette formulation “réussir sa vie”. Quand j’étais en fac, mes copains/ines avaient tous de grandes ambitions et moi je n’osais pas dire que faire carrière ne m’intéressait pas, je voulais juste m’épanouir (même si c’est un peu niais de le dire comme çà) et je le voyais plutôt dans ma sphère privée. Quelques 30 ans plus tard, tout n’est pas parfait mais je suis heureuse, essentiellement grace à mon homme (depuis 25 ans) qui est une perle rare. En fait, il y a des périodes on a envie de bosser, de se donner à fond pour des projets exaltants et d’autres où on a envie de s’occuper de soi, de ses proches, de regarder les fleurs pousser tout simplement et malheureusement, ç’est rarement possible dans notre société d’alterner ces différentes phases. Il y a une phrase aussi que j’aime beaucoup (de Paul Smith, le couturier que j’adore) : “je n’ai jamais eu d’ambition, tout ce que je voulais c’était passer une bonne journée”.

  • dear garance,
    oh my…perfect – thank you so so much. i’m old enough to be your mother – and totally relate to what you’re talking about. after a long, challenging career, two children, house, etc – i find i want to retire from my demanding work life – read more, garden more, paint more, “yoga” more. i want to relax – let go and do nothing sometimes. (so hard in this hard-driving culture we live in). you’ve echoed what i’ve been feeling – and i want to tell you how much i appreciate you for it!

  • sommer July, 11 2017, 3:30 / Reply

    Hi Garance,

    Thank you for the “keeping it real” post. I’ve followed you for years and always come back for a quick pick-me-up, a style snack, a beautiful sketch, and—of course—archieves of inspiration. As someone who struggles with the “wtf am I doing with my life” (even at 37, eeek), it’s nice to be reminded of omnipresent success pressures we face and how we must make a conscious effort to not be so damn tough on ourselves. Or, move to a very remote island, sans internet, and just exist. Can I, please? ;) Here’s to shutting down the noise and embracing the little joys of life as they come.

  • J’appelle ça le “syndrome première de la classe”, je connais bien, j’en souffre aussi. Purée que c’est dur d’en sortir! C’est tellement facile d’enfouir la petite voix tout au fond pour la faire taire…
    Merci pour tes mots qui disent si bien les choses.

  • therese July, 11 2017, 3:32 / Reply

    Brilliant Garance!
    “for what we could become” What a perfect thought. I love the idea of not getting stuck in that place we felt was so important to achieve. I have completely flipped my life in my 50’s. I’m no longer the person everyone expects me to be. I feel free.

    Those that love me are still along for the ride. The one’s that were just using me are gone. I’ve learned that it’s nver too late to change because we are always evolving.

    Keep sharing when it feels joyous and never when it is a burden.


  • Franka July, 11 2017, 3:33 / Reply

    Oh wow, this was just so great and refreshing to read! Such a great opinion on how everybody is able to change and how that is a good thing. I totally agree to the thought, that you can become whoever you wan’t to be and that you can even change that once a while, personality is so not set in stone. As a 16-year-old, soon graduating and looking for my future place in life (as you called it so well), i feel like I really had to read this. So thanks for opening up and saying this. Really grateful.
    Lots of love as an truly admirer of yours,
    xx, Franka

    (PS: I’m very sorry for my English, I also thought about writing in French, but that seemed to end up even more mixed up, soo… ;-))

  • Bonjour Garance, merci pour votre mots! I too believe that we women have put too much importance to be what others believe we should be, rather than being who we want to be. Thank you for being honest with your feelings and doubts, hope more women will be inspired to be true to themselves.

  • Garance ta voix est la tienne – unique – mais elle fait écho à celles de nombreux/ses d’entre nous qui te lisent toujours avec autant de plaisir. Tu trouves les mots justes et cela me touche personnellement même si nos vies et nos univers sont si différents.

  • Je ne commente plus depuis très longtemps, mais je suis toujours là à suivre l’evolution de GaranceDoré.com puis Atelier Doré…mais je ne pouvais empêcher mon eternelle surprise face à ta capacité à dire les choses telles qu’elles sont, authentiquement, une franchise rare.
    En même temps, démystifier la réussite telle que l’on entend cette notion est plus qu’important dans ce monde bercé d’illusions (au sens propre comme au sens figuré).
    Tu sembles heureuse, c’est tout ce qui compte.

  • I love how you describe the important views of life and evolving! Nothing is ever perfekt. Thank you for sharing. Bisous!

  • Dear Garance, it’s so great to read something you wrote! Finally! I was waiting for this the last weeks. And: you’re so true! I’m a doctor, I’m 43, I have two kids and I read your blog for 8 years now and I don’t want to be the good girl anymore. Always you have to function, I finally want to play with my rules. Therefore I’m looking for women who give me the inspirations. They don’t need to be perfect, I like people who have gone a long way in their brain and thoughts and become real individuals. And you’re one of those women! You’re great!
    Big hug!

  • Garance je te lis depuis si longtemps mais n’ai jamais vraiment osé commenter. Mais là c’st obligé :-) des vies on en a plusieurs et j’en témoigne il faut savoir suivre son instinct et se jeter dans l’aventure (même si par moment on se demande pourquoi on se met à tout remettre en cause ) et je ne l’ai jamais regretté car fondamentalement cela m’a permis de me construire et de bâtir une vie qui me correspond. je vis actuellement dans la ville que j’ai toujours rêvée (oui je rêvais Paris notamment grâce aux romans, magazines..) à savoir Paris, et je vis avec l’homme que j’aime et avec qui je suis en phase sur le projet de vie. je n’ai pas d’enfant par choix après avoir fini par m’écouter et accepter que fondamentalement je n’en avais pas l’envie mais plutôt la fameuse peur “de regretter un jour” que tout médecin, bonnes copines ou famille te serine à longueur de temps quand arrive les 35 ans.. et puis j’ai su m’entourer de gens qui ont des vies différentes, des femmes plus âgées en couple avec des hommes jeunes, des gays garçons ou filles, des gens qui ont changé de vie en quittant des jobs de dingue pour des petits commerces ou devenus artistes et finalement ce que je peux retenir aujourd’hui du haut de mes (un peu plus de) 40 ans c’est que la vraie conquête est la liberté : liberté de vivre, d’aimer qui on veut, de construire la famille que l’on veut (et une famille peut être un couple), d’être entouré de gens qui vous font du bien .. dans ma vie personnelle je pense que je suis arrivée depuis qq années maintenant à cet équilibre serein. Reste le job … qui m’envahit encore trop (d’ailleurs il est 22h à Paris et je bosse encore meme si je fais une petite pause avec ton post) c’est l’étape suivante : arriver à se détacher d’un job valorisant qui est la suite logique de belles études mais finalement qui me bouffe la vie. Encore un effort vers la liberté à faire finalement. En tout cas merci Garance pour ce partage sur tout ce qui t’anime et les changements que tu vis et assumes, une belle source d’inspiration et de réassurance quand par moment je me dis que ma vie n’est pas un fleuve tranquille mais qu’est ce qu’elle est riche ! bisous de Paris (et je te trouve de plus en plus belle)

  • Je t’ai reconnue :-))))

  • Mercedes July, 11 2017, 4:05 / Reply

    I celebrate so much being a woman at this moment in time when we can share our struggles and not feeling alien and alone. I am thankful for you G and this space, it felt always a safe place. Not only I enjoy reading you but also reading the comments from women all over the world that might be experiencing the same life changes, there is an invisible thread that connects everybody. I have had also experienced a personal revolution last year, and now I am in the state of what I learnt is called “liminal space”. What I only know is that I am in the right direction. Bisous!

  • Merci pour ce beau billet

  • marguerite July, 11 2017, 4:23 / Reply

    un bacio grande garance <3

  • Je visite le blog autant qu’avant, mais je dois admettre que tu me manques! Je pense que tu peux te permettre d’être si bien dans ta vie grâce à ton équipe, qui fait de l’excellent travail en ton absence! Mais j’espère avoir plus de nouvelle de toi très bientôt!

  • Great post. Cultivating that joie de vivre comes when we let go rather than striving and pushing to be perfect. It’s when we let go when life begins to open up.

  • Thank you for sharing your stories – it somehow always feels like catching up with a good friend. If by chance fertility (or hormones generally) are still on your mind, it would be worth meeting with Dr. Jing at TCM Healing Center (acupuncture) now that you’re in LA. She’s truly a baby whisperer (her office wall is floor to ceiling baby pictures from clients who’ve gotten pregnant). You’d have to drink some very bitter teas, but I’ve never worked with an acupuncturist who delivered such tangible and dramatic results.

  • Hélène July, 11 2017, 4:44 / Reply

    Merci Garance ! Hâte de lire la suite !

  • La Belle Cordière July, 11 2017, 4:48 / Reply

    Merci pour ce témoignage Garance. Et comment avez-vous fait pour vous débarrasser de cet “uncomfortable amount of weight” ?

  • Marcella July, 11 2017, 4:51 / Reply

    Thank you for sharing, what a lovely message. This part in particular really stuck with me: “I didn’t feel good, and that’s probably why my friendships were shaky.” I have struggled over the past few years with forming deep relationships due a constant fear of not feeling “interesting” enough (pretty enough, smart enough, funny enough…) to have someone else want me in their life. An overall lack of self-confidence that slowly creeps up without you really noticing it until it’s overwhelming. Your writing reminds me to forgive myself for where I am (and who I am), and to reconnect with the people and activities that give me energy. xxx

  • I totally understand. As one grows up, it’s hard to make new, deep friendships. I’ve changed and some of my old friends don’t understand the world I live in. I love them to bits but I need new friends as well but it’s hard to make them particularly when you don’t really know who you are inside either.

    Thank you for the post, Garance, I feel bad saying it but I haven’t visited the site much lately because it’s your voice which interests me. Its good to hear from you.


  • Djoeke July, 11 2017, 4:58 / Reply

    Chère Garance,

    Merci, pour être ici, je te trouve très courageuse e j’adore ton authenticité, pour moi, c’est le plus importante de la vie e tes articles m’inspirent beaucoup.

    J’espère que tu continueras, je te trouve un example très belle et j’aime bien ton sens d’humor aussi:-)))!!!

    Bonne chance!

    Des bisous, Djoeke

  • Merci Garance pour ce post. J’en suis exactement au même point dans ma vie et je me sens tellement mieux, tellement plus libre. I’ve finally learnt to build my boat.

  • Hi Garance, I missed reading about you. Thanks for the update, and for being you. True and authentic. You truly inspire me in your pursuit to find what makes you happy, not what the world wants you to be :)

  • Ivette July, 11 2017, 5:29 / Reply

    Garance! I never comment on blog posts but this time have to. You’ve said it all and thank you for that. I’ve had the same thoughts recently and this post really helped me.

  • Luciana July, 11 2017, 5:31 / Reply

    Garance, quel joie lire votres mots, parce que la honnêteté faire toujours du bien – elle emmene un sens de liberté.

    Lire vos mots me faire sentir à l’aise avec qui je suis, avec moi même.

    Merci :)

  • Melissa July, 11 2017, 5:35 / Reply

    Merci! The garance I fell in love with! Honest, imperfect, cool and inspirational. I am sitting here with my 10 week old and no more perfect yoga body as I did pre IVF! So in love and constantly thinking how work means something so different now, that I’m not sure I care to be as thin as before and with so much beauty and still stress! Much love to you!
    Ps this was typed with one hand… don’t give up on baby!

  • L. Clotilde July, 11 2017, 5:38 / Reply

    Cela fait désormais des années que je te suis, quasiment depuis les débuts, j’ai désormais 27 ans, et je suis impressionnée du parcours que tu as pu avoir. On a pu percevoir (à un millième de la réalité probablement) les chamboulements de ta carrière et de ta vie à travers ce blog. Et il faut le dire quelle beau chemin et quelle belle leçon… On te retrouve toujours telle que tu es. Une femme inspirante. Merci

  • Jane R-D July, 11 2017, 5:47 / Reply

    Thank you Garance for your wisdom & honesty – your thoughts strike a chord with me & also reflect so many discussions I’ve had with women of all ages I know & love – it is so valuable that you highlight the overwhelming expectations to have it all & to be meaningful & to do ‘the right thing’ at all times & in all areas of life. How is it possible for a woman of any age to not feel like she is constantly failing in some area of her life no matter how much she puts in? Sometimes the current pressure to find ‘life balance’ & ‘healthy lifestyle’ can seem unhealthy & self-absorbed, while being quietly (& sometimes exhaustingly) caught up in necessary demands involved in caring for the needs of others is undervalued. It seems so important to be kinder to ourselves & to others through being more collaboratively supportive & accepting of difference – & less competitive.

  • Severine July, 11 2017, 5:57 / Reply

    Merci !!
    Je suis moi aussi particulièrement tes posts car ils reflètent ou un travail de fond, ou des joies de vivre, ou des partages dentrepreneuse, et le tout me parle fort.
    J’ai envie de te dire un grand bravo pour ta page de vie NY+ monter un business qui marche, et un grand bravo pour avoir osé tourner cette page pour en vivre une nouvelle (ça ne veut pas dire couper avec le passé mais faire des chargements suffisamment importants pour que la vie soit vécue différemment ). Je crois qu’en réalité j’adore les changements de vie dans la vie, et j’aime faire pareil.
    Je suis en train de tâter le papier pour tourner la mienne actuelle que je vie depuis 10 ans, je me réjouis de ce que je vais découvrir

  • marielike July, 11 2017, 6:16 / Reply

    At last….
    nothing is permanent but change !
    life is all about your ability to adapt and the path is rocky ;)

  • Tourdivoire July, 11 2017, 6:27 / Reply

    Amour toujours. Depuis février 2008 que je te lis, tu as tant changé, j’ai tant changé… Et pourtant j’ai toujours l’impression que nous sommes presque amies, même si je ne t’ai vue “IRL” qu’un bref moment en 2010 ! Tes conseils, tes confidences, tes dessins, ton exemple continuent de beaucoup compter pour moi.
    Merci pour ta sincérité et vivement les prochains posts, drôles ou touchants ! Les lectrices de la première heure sont toujours là (et pas près de te laisser tomber).

  • ashley July, 11 2017, 7:05 / Reply

    I loved this post. Often I find more soul-baring posts from other places can seem a little.. disingenuous. But this one felt raw without oversharing. I also loved that of all the changes that you mentioned, from buying a house even to falling in love, all felt like choices to me. As I sit here trying to piece together my next steps, I’ve often felt like I’m walking on autopilot without actively steering myself towards where I want to be. As a result I often feel like I don’t have very much choice or control over my life’s direction. I loved that all the things that you accomplished seem like active choices with control and thought behind them. Congratulations on everything!

  • Honest, raw, authentic. This crazy social media age perpetuates and amplifies the ‘comparison game’ ‘perfectionist’ and ‘people pleaser’ in our modern day society. To live an authentic life, we must let go of all these self-limiting beliefs and expectations in order to create a life that lights ‘you’ up; and supports and nourishes your creativity, mind, body and soul.

    Thanks for sharing,

    Ali x

  • Rebecca July, 11 2017, 8:21 / Reply

    Thanks for writing a little about your transformation over the last 3 years. I started following your blog around 2014, and since then I’ve also been going through a major personal transformation. Hearing about the changes you’ve had the courage to make is honestly probably why I’ve felt so connected to this blog, and continue to follow it. Thank you sooo much for keeping it personal. This can be so tricky in the online world but you do it with such grace.

  • Sometimes i do wonder, the more modern times are, the more backwards our quality of life is. To me, perfection wasn’t even a concept that I knew growing up in the 90s. There was no need to really ‘show off’ as life was as it was. Life was simple but good. We were more ‘ok’ with not having it all. Nowadays not having it all almost seems like a curse that needed to be rectified. Worse still, a curse that we are rectifying at the expense of a lot of more important things. Being ok with one’s circumstance felt like he/she’s not trying hard enough. By the end of the day, my conviction is that as long as you’re living life with love, purpose and intent, you’ve won the race.

  • Camilla July, 11 2017, 10:19 / Reply

    Hello Garance, i haven’t read your blog in a long time and came back today to read. The above writing really spoke to me, i’m about to embark on a new and very scary adventure- thank you for sharing and inspiring. CJx

  • Thank you Garance!
    It’s so true that we women are able” to push ourselves past our limits and to be self-sacrificing” , it’s true we are losing ourselves, but at the same time it’s not easy to go and do what your hart is telling as we all living in this materialistic world. Specially if I’m in my late 30s and I feel my career/life path went a little crooked..I don’t need much but I still need money to live and it’s not easy to let it go unless I had financial support which I don’t have. Unfortunately it’s so much of financial part what keeps me away from finding myself again:( and I don’t know how to overcome it.

  • Hi Garance,
    I’ve been following your blog for years and this post really resonates with the “me” now in my early 40’s. I live in a traditional Asian society that views a 40-something Asian lady with no husband (ME) as a single biggest life failure and nor do I have a huge career success to make up for the marital lack of. Despite it all, I keep striving to be myself and keep my head high. After reading that someone who is seemingly so successful is equally having to struggle to be yourself, I don’t feel so alone in the journey anymore. Thank you. :)

  • Allison July, 12 2017, 12:57 / Reply

    Merci Garance. I love this post. You are so strong and honest – with yourself and everyone else. You are a true inspiration. ??

  • Ai-Ch'ng GB July, 12 2017, 1:07 / Reply

    Such a timely and heartfelt revelation was this post today?

    I’ve been chatting with a friend about how people’s perceptions, and our own perceptions of those people, have profound effect on not just us- but also on the other person. And, in my head, I see almost a tug-o-war happening… when what we really yearn for, is a harmonious dance- a dialogue, between us and that other person.

    And sometimes, that other person is none other than our own, “other voice”.

    The moments of stillness we can create (not snatch, because life is not to snatch at, but to seek and create opportunities for improving ourselves and the world around us through how we nurture our spirit, and then our family, friends, community, our projects) are what give us the claitity to hear what is the kind and right thing to do in that very moment. And, it will be different for everyone. Because we are all different.

    One thing I realise as I sail towards forty nine (which, as it’s turned out, is nowhere near as horrible as I thought it may be when I was in my late twenties and throughout my thirties- it’s quite nice, actually, and doesn’t feel like a huge deal), is that we make the mistake of thinking of we can’t have everything. Of course we can! Because, as soon as think we don’t have everything, but we are going to bw happy about it, that’s just settling for second best, and still having ar the backs of our minds, that there’s still more we want.

    We can actually “have” everything! And that happens the moment when we believe that we want for absolutely nothing else.

    The words that have got me through many times, are those of Sinead O’Connor, “I do not want what I haven’t got”… and my favourite seven words, “I am that I am”, and, “I am enough”.

  • CarolineM July, 12 2017, 1:29 / Reply

    Bonjour Garance.
    Quel plaisir de vous lire.
    Pas seulement pour vos messages si justes et si honnêtes mais vous avez une fluidité d’écriture. Une petite musique très douce.
    Le vrai changement et cette chance.
    Je l’ai immédiatement senti.
    C’est d’avoir rencontrer un homme magnifique, si vrai et vous vous ressemblez physiquement et dans les projections de vie.
    Il vous a emmené vers ce que vous êtes profondément et depuis toujours.
    Bon voyage ??

  • So great! Like always, so darn great. Love! x

  • Jeanne July, 12 2017, 2:20 / Reply

    Your article is so unusually honest and touches many of us who got stuck in places where we no longer want to be, for all the wrong reasons, with health suffering for it. Thank you for making us feel less lonely and for the inspiration and hope it gives us. Un grand merci!

  • Oh Garance, ce post m’a touché en plein cœur.
    Merci pour ta franchise, pour tes mots qui résonnent toujours si justement à nos/mes oreilles.
    Oui s’affranchir du vouloir faire plaisir aux autres n’est pas facile, demande du temps. Je vais avoir 40 ans en fin d’année et trouve ça difficile et douloureux, mais vieillir a cette immense vertu d’aider à se libérer de ces pseudo attentes toxiques.
    J’espère que tu vas bien et t’embrasse fort

  • Merci Garance pour ce post qui résonne beaucoup en moi. Je traverse cette étape de réflexion en ce moment avec un job haut placé mais épuisant, une ville qui ne me plaît plus, pas assez de temps pour soi… c’est dur de se remettre en question quand on a enfin de job de rêve et que l’on se rend compte que la seule chose que l’on veut c’est juste un peu de temps pour profiter de la vie !
    Merci pour ces posts sincères que j’apprécie tant de lire.
    Julia, une fidèle lectrice depuis 10 ans !

  • Merci Garance pour ces mots

  • Thank you for this post. Now I am reading your book “Love Style Life”, and it is so inspiring as long as another information you have shared with us here. Life is a journey and it is exciting to observe how we change during it :)

  • Thank you for this post. Now I am reading your book “Love Style Life”, and it inspires me, as long as another information you have shared with us here. Life is a journey and it’s exciting to observe how we are changing during it :)

  • Wow… your article really resonates with me. Thank you. Been on my own “revolution” this part year…. and it is not easy.
    Have to keep challenging myself, and Trust the Process. Sometimes a lonely journey so good to know others are going trough something similar.

  • Merci Garance! Tu es la messagère d’une époque. Ta recherche intérieure résonne en beaucoup d’entre nous. Après l’ère de l’hyper-perfectionnisme, de la performance à outrance et de la volonté de se transformer en wonderwoman, je crois que nous sommes plusieures à rechercher un autre type d’épanouissement lié à l’acceptation de nos faiblesses, à assumer notre être dans son intégralité et à être à la quête de sens au-delà de l’apparence. Bravo pour ton honnêteté et merci de nous faire partager ton évolution.

  • Wow… your article really resonates with me. Thank you for your honesty !
    Been on my own “revolution” this part year…. and it is not easy.
    Have to keep challenging myself, let go of the things that does not serve me anymore and Trust the Process. Sometimes a lonely journey, so good to know others are going trough something similar. Suppose the trick is to try and enjoy the ride and all that unfolds with it.

  • Merci pour ce post plein d’honnêteté et d’humilité ! Il est tellement important de parler de l’envers du décor et de s’aider à affronter la vie avec des hauts et des bas. La vie est pleine de surprises et il faut la vivre intensément chacun à sa manière ! Cette année s’annonce également être un grand changement pour moi, je pars m’installer à Los Angeles avec mon copain, on quitte Paris et notre Bretagne natale. J’espère que j’aurais l’occasion de t’y croiser ou re-rencontrer ! ;)

  • Tluangi July, 12 2017, 5:01 / Reply

    Thank you for this post!!

  • Wow, ton article fait grand bien et me conforte dans le virage que j’entreprends ! Mon corps et ma tête m’ont dit stop! Je voulais être mince en ayant eu arrêté de fumer, je voulais être une mère parfaite, je faisais du sport 2 fois matin et soir, je voulais manger mieux et light, je voulais consommer autrement, je voulais, je voulais, je voulais…et puis mon corps et ma tête n’ont plus voulu!!! Ce que pense les autres de moi m’importe tellement que je me suis oublié depuis tant année. C’est fini (enfin je l’espère) j’aspire à une vie plus douce, au respect de moi-même, à faire ce qui me ressemble et le jugement des autres ne devraient pas entraver mon chemin! Je te remercie mille fois d’être ce que tu es devenue, une merveilleuse, douce, inspirante et bienveillante personne, loin des dictats qui me (je vais parler pour moi) pourrissent la vie! Le chemin a du être long, mais ça en valait la peine!

  • Leila Calmard July, 12 2017, 5:30 / Reply

    Ton point de vue sur les réseaux et ce qu’on attend des femmes est intéressant. Je t’invite à lire l’article du Monde paru ce we sur l’écrivaine Virginie Despentes, justement à propos des femmes ! Fracassant. Plein de bonnes choses pour toi :-)

  • Looks like you have struck a chord with so many of us. And most importantly, yourself.
    Being strong sometimes means being weak in your own eyes. Life is always happening and you can find happiness and calmness even if you dont have “everything”.
    So much love!

  • Dear Garance, thank you for this honest post. As a orientation coach, what touches me the most is the idea of struggling to find your place in life and then, after a few years, discovering that we are stuck there and that maybe we want something different after all. My own life experience has taught me that life is organic and that we are allowed to change our mind even about our dreams. And that we should not judje ourselves or others when that shift happens! thank you again

  • Marije July, 12 2017, 6:08 / Reply

    This directly resonates with the questions I have been asking myself lately and am struggling with. Thanks for sharing this. The next step will not be the last step (as indeed, life is a journey) but will be a step in the right direction.

  • I’ve always loved your honesty and today the fact that you’ve mentioned that pregnancy didn’t happen for you has meant the world to me.

  • Agnese July, 12 2017, 6:24 / Reply

    Garance, I love to hear from You so much, from years of reading Your posts, i feel like You are my friend(i know it is not true, but still), and i do want to know how my friend are doing, but only if You want to tell, never feel like You have to, you don’t! I believe i speak from all of Your readers that all we want is for You to be happy!!!

  • Thank you for such an encouraging and comforting article. Reading such a text after an exhausting day at work, it really relieves. First time leaving comment, just would like to say it’s enjoying reading the articles here!

  • INNA SALIY July, 12 2017, 7:03 / Reply

    Thank you for this sincere post. Now I am reading your book “Love Style Life” and it inspires me, as well as another information you have shared with us here. Life is a journey and it`s exciting to observe how we are changing during it.

  • Katrin July, 12 2017, 7:12 / Reply

    “I tried to get pregnant. It didn’t work.”
    I hope you know that so many of your readers – like me – know how much might be hidden behind those few words: the hope, the pain, the sadness and heartache. Thank you for sharing them.

  • Très inspirant, très honnête, merci pour ce partage

  • Bravo!!!! A real, wise, honest, brave and eloquent person on the internet writing about actual life. Thank you Garance, you are always an inspiration but perhaps no more so than today! Living it well and keeping it real. Keep shining darling! No less worthy or inspiring, just more so. ?

  • I love your personal updates! You’re right, they’re so much better than fashion posts. :) But that doesn’t mean we need to share every detail of our lives on the internet. I have a firm rule: my marriage and my family are off limits to post about. I know this because I have posted about them in the past and felt it was too personal to share publically. Ultimately I deleted them. Thanks for sharing the parts of your life that feel good to share, and plenty of love on the rest.

  • Yes ! Merci pour ces nouvelles et pour mettre des mots sur ces choses. Je viens de passer quelques mois un peu durs à me flageller de ne pas être multimillionaire à trente ans, ni à la tête du carrière flamboyante. Mais j’ai trois enfants en bonne santé’, je vis an mon rythme et de ma plume et je commence à accepter que ma réussite ne regarde que moi et doit avant tout se mesurer à mes critères. Pas ceux des autres. (J’avoue je suis curieuse d’avoir de tes nouvelles perso, on te connaît depuis tellement longtemps que tu nous manques un peu quand tu t’absentes)

  • Hi Garance – I loved this post. As someone who went through a similar journey, and also recently left NYC, I identify with where you are coming from. I know this isn’t specific about New York, but I think the city does have a way of testing you and wearing you down when you don’t even notice.

    Mostly I wanted to comment because your note on success made me think of this TED Talk that I recently listened to. It digs deeper into what success really is for people and how it isn’t just all about the job.


  • Thank you for sharing that! I’m going to listen now :)

  • This entire post spoke to me so much, but especially this:

    “Under the guise of pushing us to feel “fulfilled,” it tells us we have to be completely photogenic (from head to toe, in addition to having a perfect house and perfect vacation, and with social media, nothing really belongs to us anymore), we have to be a doting mother, a paragon of health, and of course, have an absolutely thrilling career. All the while being politically correct, a feminist, and a philanthropist.”

    I think I’ve so been under the sway of this cultural imposition that I haven’t even been aware of its ludicrousness. Thank you so much for verbalizing it in your beautiful voice, for shining a spotlight on this particular and pernicious mode of crazymaking…

    And in case it offers any inspiration, I was immersed in babymaking for more than three years before getting pregnant at 40 and then again at 41. Sometimes when we’re older it can just take a little longer… Sending juice for whatever your desire may be!

  • Bonjour Garance, et merci de partager tout cela avec nous.
    Je ne m’explique pas le parallèle de nos ressentis, sinon par une proximité en âge. C’est souvent bluffant, tu mets des mots sur ce que je vis.
    Moi aussi j’essaie de renouer avec mes besoins et envies et ce n’est pas facile…
    Toujours portée cependant par la conviction profonde que nous avons l’incroyable chance de vivre à une époque où on peut avoir plusieurs vies dans une vie.
    Beau cheminement à toi, ta capacité à te réinventer le rendra riche et surprenant sois-en sûre!

  • Tout ces sentiments que tu décris, je les ai compris peut-être avant même que tu ne les ressentes (je me la pète là :-) je fais psy de comptoir à l’heure de l’apéro ) – Et ton épanouissement me fait réellement plaisir. Petit bémol (parce que moi là où je ne change pas, c’est que j’aime toujours autant mettre les pieds dans le plat mais toujours avec bienveillance), “démystifier la réussite” ?? moi ça me va, mais ici c’est quand même glorification/succes full/win win win & parfaitas à tous les étages. Mais je ne t’en veux pas, je t’aime bien et tu le sais :-)

  • Wouaw, je suis admirative. Il faut oser envoyer ce message si touchant et authentique complètement à contre-courant. Tu ne peux pas savoir à quel point cela me donne de la force…

  • Mariateresa July, 12 2017, 12:24 / Reply

    Finalmente! Garance you’re great!!!

  • Luciana Noronha July, 12 2017, 1:18 / Reply

    Et, bien sur, je comprends ce que tu dis sur la vie être une voyage. :) Mérci pour cette généreuse leçon.

    Je pense que quelques fois on se perdre dans le clichés, par peur, pour être, on aussi, perdu.

    Tu m’a pappelé que tous sont chapitre du voyage. Mérci!

    Avec amour ??

  • Garance, you are always so real and honest when you write. Thank you so much for the uplifting thoughts. Yes, life is not easy, but we should learn about ourselves everyday. Then we can uplift ourselves and others. You are the real thing! Love you!

  • NatalieD July, 12 2017, 2:20 / Reply

    Grand, Garance. Many people are obsessed by perfection, perfect manners, perfect job, perfect team, perfect reputation, perfect marriage…the only what is behind is playing perfectly exorbitant farce. And the most important answer to the question of these perfectly scared people: What will happen if…I leave all of this, because I am not happy? Usually nothing than closing one chapter and finding something much better, not visible before due to bubble of small world of fabulated perfection around.

  • G- Keep your private life private baby- I think that is your true nature. We will still be here for you. We are your people! We love the glimpses. It is enough, and maybe better for you. Peace.
    BTW- I really love the new format of Atelier. Well done.

  • While I don’t want to discount the possibility that at one point the yogi has spoken these words, the quote is also attributed to Charles Du Boi.

    I did a google search on the quote to find the source of the quote because I thought the quote was such a great quote that I wanted to find the text and or video, etc that the quote was originally from.

    I encountered this wiki page on Charles Frédéric Dubois, which states that the quote is wrongly attributed to the Belgian naturalist as opposed to Charles Du Boi (the French critic).

    Searching the quote via Google Books, the oldest text displaying the quote is in 1974 that attributes the quote to Charles Du Boi.

    Since the quote was initially written in French (“…premier tressaillement vital; surtout il s’agit à tout moment de sacrifier ce que nous sommes à ce que nous pouvons devenir”), I did a Google Book search using the quote in French, and I found a book on Charles Du Boi from 1951 that directly cites the quote from Du Boi’s Approximations.

  • Claire F July, 12 2017, 6:01 / Reply

    Merci Garance de tes mots sincères qui résonnent tellement en chacune d’entre nous. Je vais essayer de méditer sur la citation… comme sur le post que tu avais fait sur ton changement de goûts et d’aspirations, qui m’avait bien trotté dans la tête et dont j’ai parlé à plein de gens.
    L’harmonie intérieure et les rapports humains, c’est ça l’essentiel je crois. J’en profite pour recommander un livre qui m’avait beaucoup inspirée (sur le sujet de : qu’est-ce que la réussite / une vie réussie), à celles qui ne connaissent pas déjà : “Top 5 Regrets of the Dying”, de Bronnie Ware (ça existe aussi en français).
    Merci merci merci merci encore !

  • Claire July, 12 2017, 6:39 / Reply

    Beautiful Garance, more of this please! It’s wonderful watching your story & your style evolve. I’d love to know more about how you shed your extra skin (aka that uncomfortable, emotional weight) as I am going through something similar. With love x

  • Rachel Joy July, 12 2017, 7:15 / Reply

    Thank you Garance. In a world where we are constantly encouraged to be this, and to be that, as females, it’s so easy to get lost in what is best for ourselves and not what others say is best. Your post is a reminder to always put ourselves first.
    I’m going through another phase of “trying” to be a better version of me, letting go of my insecurities, focusing on me.. but this time I’m just… doing it, not trying to. And your words are very encouraging and exactly the kind I want to hear from the kind of people I want to surround myself with.
    Thank you!! Xx

  • Thank you, Garance!

  • Thanks for speaking from the heart. Your dilemma is so relatable. Thanks for posting.

  • Damn strait!

    I find myself constantly unlearning what I’ve been taught to believe about myself, my life, my relationships with others, getting deep at the root of what I believe and feel. The journey toward a purity. It truly is a process.

    It reminds me of the quote I will paraphrase and botch in the process, from Nelson Mandela, about how when we let our light shine it liberates others to do the same.

    Celebrating imperfection feels light, and beautiful, and joyful. And yet, the celebrating comes from incredible strength.

  • Merci Garance! Ce texte fait du bien.

  • Maureen July, 13 2017, 1:18 / Reply

    Hi Garance, are you sometimes surprised by the great response you get? I love your posts. It is so true how nice it is to taken the pressure off yourself. I recently retired and initially felt guilty about doing only what I wanted to do! Now It’s feels great, it’s like being a kid again. Some people bang on about having a purpose, isn’t enjoying life enough xx

  • There’s nothing like getting a little uncomfortable sometimes, to figure out what you need and want :-)

  • Sophie July, 13 2017, 6:38 / Reply

    Alors moi qui suis en ce moment dans une espèce de detox (j’ai viré Instagram de mon téléphone, et je pars en week-end avec un 3310 ces derniers temps…) je ne peux qu’être d’accord avec toi. Je me rends compte que je me suis mise une pression de dingue sur des trucs qui finalement ne me faisaient / font plus vraiment plaisir en ce moment (comme démontrer que j’ai du talent, “documenter” ma vie , en fait passer mon temps à attendre l’approbation du monde), pour finalement me rendre compte que j’avais réussi un truc qui n’était pas mon objectif premier mais dont je suis finalement extrèmement fière. Donc c’est génial et déconcertant à la fois (aussi bien pour moi que pour les autres…)

    Je suis contente de lire l’un de tes articles en tout cas ;-)

  • C’est un très beau billet, Garance.
    Il résonne particulièrement en moi en cet été car je quitte le “comme il faut” avec le sentiment de devoir faire mes preuves et d’être attendue au tournant par tous ceux qui estiment que c’est “inconcevable” de chercher à vivre plus en accord avec soi (et, du coup, avec les autres – il me semble).
    Soyons les personnes que nous devons être. ;)

  • Elizabeth July, 13 2017, 7:48 / Reply

    Thank you for this wonderful post Garance. Reading through the comments there is definitely a universal thread of women feeling lost and unsure about who they are what direction they want their lives to take – me too! Which made wonder if you’d consider doing a post on how to get there? I’m sure you’d know some wonderful people to provide guidance.
    All the best :)

  • Chère Garance,

    Je vous remercie de tout mon coeur pour votre essai si émouvant et courageux. Votre sincérité me plait beaucoup–si rare dans notre monde d’aujourd’hui. Je suis aussi en train de me poser des questions fondamentales sur la réussite personnelle et professionnelle. Récemment, il y a deux mois, j’ai changé de régime alimentaire et je me sens beaucoup mieux. Je vois la différence déjà! Mais ce petit changement est seulement un début–je suis en train de prévoir un autre futur pour ma vie avec plus d’écriture et moins de business stressant. Je pense que notre état d’âme a une impacte importante sur toutes les personnes dans notre vie, commençant avec l’homme qu’on aime.

  • Rochelle Boström July, 13 2017, 10:06 / Reply

    Loved this post. ‘ In my opinion, trying to force yourself into that mold is the complete opposite of success.’ Couldn’t agree more.

  • Meredith Callahan July, 13 2017, 11:11 / Reply

    Great post. Thank you!

    One question: You mention the film Rock ‘n Roll is on iTunes, but I can only find the soundtrack, not the movie. Do you have a link to the film in iTunes?

  • stephee July, 13 2017, 12:05 / Reply

    Dear Garance,
    it is truely amazing that you seem to have the ability to look into my head and my heart. Every word is true for me, although I never could express my thoughts and feelings with such elegance and beauty in style. You should never again worry about career, your talent for writing is a gift that makes your readers happy and helps them to lead a better life. I can’t even think about a bigger career.
    Your words found me in a perfect moment, I’m 50 and menopause suddenly hit me, which is a real challenge. I always regarded myself as stable and full of energy, family, job, friends, I managed everything. But now, I can’ t go on that way and the harder I try the bigger the mess gets. I simply loose control. But maybe that is not that bad. It might be a real adventure to see what I could become as an aging women.
    Thanks for all, have a great time!


  • The only person in life you can truly worry about disappointing is yourself. If you take the long way in life, you just enjoy the scenery more. That is something my dad has always told me, and it is still true to this day.

    there are no plans that cannot be unmade, and there is zero time to worry about how you seem to other people. Just be kind. To others, as well as yourself.

  • I gave notice at a job I love for a shaky new thing yesterday, and really needed to read this! Merci Garance

  • Gaelle July, 13 2017, 5:48 / Reply

    Salut Garance, je viens de lire ton article et de voir cette vidéo de May qui parle comme toi, du fait qu’on grandit dans un modèle unique de progression horizontale, vous me faites beaucoup de bien toutes les deux, merci ! Je partage ce désir de simplicité dans un monde ou l’apparence devient si importante et ou on se définit davantage avec le verbe avoir plutôt qu’être.

  • Gaëlle July, 13 2017, 6:45 / Reply

    Tu es géniale.

  • Hi Garance! Really enjoyed this post. I always appreciate your candor. You write write with such honestly and I find it very refreshing and so relatable. Thank you!

  • Kai To July, 14 2017, 2:06 / Reply

    Always have been a fan and can never give a rat’s arse whether you’re at fashion shows or not. What I mean is that I’m a fan of your personal take on life so I’ll follow your blog wherever you go – fashion shows or not, whether you’re resting or not.
    But of course, I can only do that if you keep an online presence – in whatever form it takes lol. Just give a head’s up if you’re going offline, just so I know whether to check back haha.

  • Valeria July, 14 2017, 3:35 / Reply

    Thank you for this post, it is amazing! I’m so happy for you and that you are brave enough to make changes and to be happy! I have so similar thoughts nowadays. I have a great career and everyone tells me that I’m so lucky to be working at this company. But my personal attitude has changed, and I feel that I need to make some change, to do something else in life but work. But I’m not brave enough to make this first step. And your post is this inspiration I was looking for, which once again highlights that everything is possible.

  • Merci Garance,

    you make me realize that i might be in the same situation you were in. Constantly pushing myself but not taking the time to reflect on what i really need. I think it’s time to give myself some time apart and some rest.

  • Dear Garance, I lately started re-following your Instagram account after I stopped reading your blog some time ago. I must admit it was exactly what you described, for sure it was aesthetically perfect but I somehow felt too perfect to be true. Being redirected to your Instagram account, you seem so happy, lively and energetic and it is a joy to watch you. Reading this now after coming here from Man Repeller, it makes even more sense and confirms my impression. I am truly happy for you and what you have been writing is a real affirmation and inspiration for doing things the way they feel right to you, only you and in that very moment, not living up to the perfect picture you created for yourself years ago and that might be so much out of context now. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us, I am very much looking forward to see what is next fr you. Enjoy LA!

  • This is so refreshing! Your vulnerability and honesty are brave in a world of perfection. Love this. Thank you. ?

  • Oh so many comments but I add mine anyway. I like how you mentioned getting ourselves a little out of place-I “disrupted” myself this last year and became a painter! Drama, intrigue, bliss! I find myself battling everyday with new expectations of myself, what to paint, how to market, how to share on social and what I “think” is expected of me next. Nonsense! Who is making these “rules” anyway? I just read that the secret of living “outside the box” is anytime you see (or feel) the box closing in around you to take it out to the curb for recycling! haha! If I can’t take a chance on being myself now-then when?!! Fabulous post, even with its nuances of what is next for you!

  • Mercí! I came to the same realization this year. It has been a very tough and trying year. At the end, I was sick of trying to be perfect ‘my whole life.’ No more. I was hurt by the constant subtle personal criticism and constant envy by my friend of many years. No more. I was tired of rushing around everywhere for everyone but me. No more. I let people say what they want and always tried to be the perfect daughter. No more. I neglected my husband for many years, until shockingly he told me we were hanging on a thread. No more. I know longer could do this to my kids, my husband and myself. I no longer try to be perfect. I no longer look at Instagram/Facebook etc on an hourly or daily basis (I don’t care where or what anyone is doing or thinking). I put my phone away now, and spend real time with my kids and husband. I removd myself from my friend. I speak up (that’s it). I fell in love again with my husband. It is a work in progress. There are good and cloudy days. But overall, the days are getting sunnier, and I am happier.

  • Thank you for these words of wisdom!

  • Toujours surprenant de lire de vrais ressentis exprimés avec justesse. Effectivement tu résonnes, tu fais sacrément echo. Pourtant je n ai rien accompli au sens où on l entend la plupart du temps, du moins professionnellement. Ne me suis jamais sentie embarquée dans un engrenage car je mène réellement une vie simple à l’écart des différents diktats que tu connais tant. Malgré tout tu me parles aussi et c est tellement chouette de te lire que je ne peux que t inciter à continuer de nous écrire. Pour autant, si tu ne le faisais plus, si tu disparaissais loin d internet sous ta pergola ou en Corse dans les montagnes de Corte il n y aurait pas de sentiment d abandon il me semble. Tes lectrices te plébiscitent mais c est justement parce qu elles t aiment qu elles n exigent rien de toi que tu ne pourrais plus nous donner de ton plein gré. Ta sensibilité, ta perception, tes illustrations, tes mots, le foule de choses que tu nous as gracieusement offertes sur un plateau pendant toutes ces années de partage nous ont tant apportées. Tu ne nous dois pas davantage. Bien au contraire. Nous te sommes redevables. Suis si contente de savoir que tu t inscris désormais dans un chemin de vie qui te comblera pleinement. Elisa

  • Toujours surprenant de lire de vrais ressentis exprimés avec justesse. Effectivement tu résonnes, tu fais sacrément echo. Pourtant je n ai rien accompli au sens où on l entend la plupart du temps, du moins professionnellement. Ni ne me suis jamais sentie embarquée dans un engrenage car je mène réellement une vie simple à l’écart des différents diktats que tu connais tant. Malgré tout tu me parles aussi et c est tellement chouette de te lire que je ne peux que t inciter à continuer de nous écrire. Pour autant, si tu ne le faisais plus, si tu disparaissais loin d internet sous ta pergola ou en Corse dans les montagnes de Corte il n y aurait pas de sentiment d abandon il me semble. Tes lectrices te plébiscitent mais c est justement parce qu elles t aiment qu elles n exigent rien de toi que tu ne pourrais plus nous donner de ton plein gré. Ta sensibilité, ta perception, tes illustrations, tes mots, le foule de choses que tu nous as gracieusement offertes sur un plateau pendant toutes ces années de partage nous ont tant apportées. Tu ne nous dois pas davantage. Bien au contraire. Nous te sommes redevables. Suis si contente de savoir que tu t inscris désormais dans un chemin de vie qui te comblera pleinement. Elisa

  • Thank you for sharing this, and letting me know I’m not alone.

  • Je crois que nous avons tous une image de nous-même que l’on essaye de suivre. Mais ce n’est qu’une image, qu’un discours intérieur souvent limitant. On est bien plus qu’un simple personnage dans une histoire que l’on s’est imaginé. Il faut savoir écouter son être, ce qui nous fait bien, nous fait vibrer sur le moment. Qu’importe les erreurs, qu’importent l’extérieur…etc. C’est beaucoup plus respectueux et bien plus enrichissant, même si ça nous emmène parfois sur des chemins que nous n’aurions pas imaginé, au moins on fait ce que nous sommes.

  • Beautifully written, as always.

    So sorry your journey to parenthood is proving difficult. It seems so common now. I am a grandmother, so not affected directly, but I think too many women still think they can put off pregnancy to follow other paths, and it will be easy once they are ready. Sadly, that usually isn’t the case.

    It does seem to me that perhaps we may be looking inward too much. If you are not fulfilled, change your circumstances if you are able. Alternately, look outward to improve other people’s lives. That may result in enough satisfaction for you, and you may find peace.

  • Michelle July, 14 2017, 12:15 / Reply

    I care much less about what other people think about me and what other people are doing with their lives and that helps me to relax and feel more confident.
    Also trying to be perfect is exhausting and you slowly realise that just feeling content and surrounding yourself with the few meaningful people and simple pleasures that you have chosen for your life are really enough.Helping other people also gives a lot of meaning to ones life.
    Trying to find ‘a place in the world’ is really just about the search to feel at ‘home’ inside yourself.Inner peace is how I define ‘success’ now.
    Also have you tried accupuncture for pregnancy? Friends who were having difficulty getting pregnant found it worked for them.I would recommend going to an acupuncturist who specialises in fertility.

  • Merveilleuse Garance!

    Ma vie serait plus terne si vous n’existeriez pas. Merci pour ce texte profond et vrai, de nous en partager le contenu et de mettre des mots là où les miens me manque.

    Bises du Canada

  • Teresa July, 14 2017, 4:00 / Reply

    Garance LOVE This post !! It is amazing and uplifting .Success should not be a ball and chain, we must enjoy every moment wit those who are important to us, pursue only goals that reflect our own principles/interests. You will be an amazing mom when the little French bundle arrives. Wishing you a great summer. Looking forward to next post and to keep hearing your genuine voice.

  • ANDREA July, 15 2017, 4:48 / Reply

    Merci Garance pour ce post qui cette fois-ci me parle plus que jamais…

    J’ai eu un méga souci de santé diagnostiqué il y a un mois et demi et depuis ma vie a été bouleversée. C’est ainsi je sais que je n’y peux rien mais c’était difficile pour moi de rebondir.

    Une amie m’a alors dit : “N’attends pas que l’orage passe, apprends à danser sous la pluie…”

    Cela ne sert à rien effectivement d’attendre CE moment où tout sera enfin absolument pparfait dans nos vies comme on l’a toute imaginé.

    On doit faire avec tout ce qui nous tombe sur la tête et danser sous la pluie en attendant le retour du soleil.

    Pleins de bises à toutes.

  • Chérazad July, 15 2017, 6:45 / Reply

    Comment ne pas réagir quand on lit une telle affection pour ses lecteurs. Pour cette fois ci, lire et repartir, ni vu ni connue ne me semblait pas possible, même si rien n’est dit de mon côté, sinon, quel plaisir de vous lire !

  • Patricia July, 15 2017, 9:24 / Reply

    Encore un post tres inspirant vous suis depuis le début et j apprécie votre plume, vos mots font écho à l intime de chaque personne . J aime aussi beaucoup votre manière d interviewer , vous créez très naturellement un lien avec votre interlocuteur et savez lui laissez la place de s exprimer ..par contre , je me permets une ” critique ” …parmi ces personnes que vous interviewez , il me semble que beaucoup d entres elles véhiculent justement cette course à la perfection dont vous parlez ..
    A l époque du début des street photographes quel bonheur , quel plaisir de voir des personnes non issues de la mode s approprier celle ci …
    Alors j espère qu à l avenir vos talents vous mèneront et nous mèneront vers des rencontres encore plus vraies ..

  • marilena vanden dool July, 15 2017, 9:45 / Reply

    Your words really spoke to me. I totally understand what you’ve been through these past three years. We really don’t see things clearly until after they’ve happened in order to understand what they mean and how we’ve come through the journey.
    Life is one “big journey.” Thank you for sharing your journey.

  • “There is never a moment when you finally ‘make it’ and you can just let go of everything because you’re ‘perfectly happy’.”

    This really opened my eyes. Maybe deep down I kind of already knew this, but it just feels so important to hear this from someone who in my eyes definitely “made it”. You’ve been one of my biggest heroes/idols for several years Garance. I look up so hard to all that you have acheeved with your blog and always admired your honest voice. And that is why I absolutely love you opening up about your struggles here. I often find myself in a negative spiral of beating myself up for being not succesful enough with my blog or not having a more interesting job/career. So reading that having all that (at least in my eyes) isn’t a garantee of happiness or feeling like ‘you made it’ is very refreshing. I agree with you that exploring what we love is the most important thing in life, and whish you all the best of luck and happiness on your journey. And I so look foreward to reading more from you!

  • Mamavalveeta03 July, 16 2017, 11:42 / Reply

    Real is better than “Instafake” anyday! Thanks for a refreshing and authentic post. That’s why you’ll always be one of my favorites. Keep it real, girl!

  • It’s inspiring to hear someone that you admire speak so openly about the things that all of us go through. As rich as I think your life is, to know that you go through the same feelings and insecurities as I do is freeing for me. Thank you so much for being so vulnerable.

  • Merci Garance! xo
    C’est la première fois que je te lis et ça ne serait sûrement pas la dernière.

  • This is so true and very refreshing to read. After having completely exhausted myself trying to reach the ‘perfect’ life, my new strategy is to judge new things by whether they give me energy or not… The life that results is perhaps not instagram perfect, it definitely doesnt follow the traditional career path …. but it creates some amazing opportunities!

  • LauraL July, 17 2017, 7:49 / Reply

    J’ai toujours aimé lire tes posts sans jamais commenter. Celui-ci trouve une raisonnance particulière en moi, alors merci. Merci parce qu’être aussi honnête est difficile (dans la vie comme sur la toile) mais tu le fais quand même et je voulais te dire que ça fait du bien. Tu fais du bien! Vraiment.

  • ainhoa July, 18 2017, 4:09 / Reply

    Merci Garance, bisous !
    PS: joli dessin

  • Your authentic voice is all I ask of Atelier Dore; I love and miss it so much! So as you continue to build and expand and hone a splendid, harmonious existence outside the blog, (Please! Please! Please!) continue to drench us with your truest voice. ?

  • Bonjour Garance! Vraiment, la lecture de ton texte m’a fait du bien et tombe à point pour moi! Je te lis depuis au moins 8 ans maintenant je crois bien… Étant une illustratrice qui débute, je te trouve réellement inspirante! Merci de ta générosité et de partager tes expériences de vie sur ce blogue.

  • So much of what you have written here is what I have been journaling about and talking about with close friends and family these past five or six years (2012 ring a bell?). As an artist, I have thought of it visually as slithering slowly out of an old snakeskin. What’s underneath is new, fresh, and exciting, but the process can feel confusing and empty at times. We lose the old and think, who am I now? My confidence was wrapped up in that old identity. I would say to people I met that I had such and such position, but I was really saying, “I’m a good girl. No reason to be afraid of me!” I wanted to make myself into something “people” could understand, who my elders could be proud of. But that was all in my head. I found out that shining my light, embracing my unique self is actually the best thing for not just me, but for my family, my friends, and everyone I meet. They actually NEED me to be ME. Great news. From my heart, thank you. That is what you are doing, too.

  • Last week I started writing about my life in love, fashion business and parenthood. I started my first post with the sentence: ‘In a world filled with super-perfect-filtered-lives, barre-bodies, #greathairdontcare, I’m pretty much… well.. not.’ I also wrote about sitting on the floor super glueing the front of my Ferragamo ballet flats. And it pretty much sums it up. I am the opposite of a saucy-glamazon minx living in a marvelous world where pores don’t exist and one starts the day with a big glass of water. Unlike the average influencer, I have 123 followers on Instagram of which 1 is my husband (and business partner). Yet, I am also an entrepreneur, a CCO, a mom, answering to a wide range of questions about fabric and fit in different languages. At the same time I answer to ‘mommy, I pooped on the toilet seat, can you help me?’, while being on the phone with buyer X in Paris. I finally felt ok with embracing who I am, and documenting the good, bad, and by times crazy life, of my husband and I, trying to build both business and bébé.

  • La première fois que je poste ici mais je voulais te dire: Merci de tes mots, Garance. Qu’il est bon de revenir à l’essentiel ( le plus dur peut être, dans nos vies ultra connectées). Ici, cela me le rappelle: nous sommes en perpétuelle évolution. Etre a l’écoute de soi -même voilà une belle philosophie pour se donner l’opportunité de devenir celle que l’on voudrait être. Sans culpabiliser parce que cela prend du temps!! S’accomplir mais en faisant ce que l’on veut vraiment! Je te souhaite le meilleur et continue la où tes envies te mènent, c’est ton plus beau cadeau! Je voulais aussi te dire, en deux ans de lectures de tes articles, j’ai trouvé la force de réaliser une De mes envies de toujours: écrire et partager mon métier de danseuse à travers la toile! :) Le projet va naître des la rentree et tu fais partie des personnes qui m’ont inspiré pour concrétiser ce petit rêve! Alors merci! Le meilleur pour toi et ta future toi!

  • Nadège July, 26 2017, 8:26 / Reply

    Lundi matin, j’ai lu un article concernant le décès d’Anne Dufourmentelle, philosophe et psychanalyste, quelques lignes d’hommages qui résument son ouvrage ” l’éloge du risque” rejoignent ton post. Vous mettez toutes les deux des mots sur ce qui m’attend ce soir, la signature d’une dernière étape de ma vie. Ce saut dans le vide il y a deux ans est résumé au travers de cet extrait et illustré par tes mots. Merci Garance pour le partage de ta vérité, sincère et honnête. “je pense qu’il n’y a pas de “petits risques”, que souvent une révolution intime vient d’infimes changements, et quels que soient les domaines dans lesquels s’inscrivent ces changements, couple, famille, travail, ils sont la première brèche d’un beaucoup plus grand bouleversement. C’est la liberté qu’il nous est douloureux de choisir, car elle implique un chemin de vérité (et jusqu’à quel point supporte-ton la vérité ?) et la perte de repères assurés, elle nous demande de commencer par faire le vide, parfois, pour retrouver ce qui anime notre désir au plus profond. Tel est le risque, peut-être en son essence, être intensément vivant, c’est-à-dire s’exposer à des vraies émotions, des vraies pensées, un vrai amour, et cela ne se fait pas sans traverser fragilités et épreuve d’une certaine solitude, mais pour une amplitude plus grande, plus vive, dans son rapport à la vie et à l’amour. “

  • Bravo pour tout ce que tu as accompli ! Tu restes toi-même et c’est l’essentiel. Tu as tellement raison, nous sommes tous conditionnés par des normes de perfection, c’est juste insupportable. Bonne continuation, bisous ma belle.

  • Hello Garance (j’adore ce surnom qui te va si bien),

    C’est “marrant” car je suis actuellement en train de rédiger un mémoire sur les e-influenceurs, leur origine, leur avenir, etc. Bien sur tu occupes une grande partie de ce mémoire puisque tu es pour moi et pour beaucoup la référence en matière de Blogging, l’une des premières à avoir réussi à en faire ton métier.
    Et à la recherche d’informations sur ton histoire et ta position actuelle dans ce monde de blogueurs je suis tombée sur cet article et j’en suis ravie. Ravie de lire que tu es et restera toujours entière et transparente vis à vis de ta communauté. Ravie de voir que ce monde d’apparances et ce besoin irrépressebile de vouloir rendre sa vie parfaite et parfaitement Instagrammable peu en éttouffer plus d’une.
    Tu es vraiment une source d’inspiration pour beaucoup.
    Tu es là où tu dois être !

    Belle continuation :)

  • Garance, I came to your site today to find some random inspiration (I’m not a regular reader at all – but that is about to change). I never thought I’d find exactly the wisdom words and motivation I needed so badly at this point in my life. Thank you so much for this, for such a huge positive impact! Bisou

  • Carol David August, 13 2017, 12:47 / Reply

    Thank you ! I love hearing your thoughts. You push me to just embrace being me , and realizing that I’m enough and everything should not be “picture perfect “

  • Venue ici suite à la lecture du post de Sophie Fontanel. Bravo et merci pour cette honnêteté, révéler l’autre face du miroir parfois plus sombre, plus triste, moins glamour n’est pas si facile en ces temps de vies instagramées en apparence si parfaites et si fun. Il est encore moins facile d’évoquer le sujet si tabou, sensible et intime de l’infertilité et encore moins d’emprunter le chemin du renoncement… Que la nouvelle voie/voix qui s’ouvre soit sereine et joyeuse !

  • Venue ici suite à la lecture du post de Sophie Fontanel. Bravo et merci pour cette honnêteté, révéler l’autre face du miroir parfois plus sombre, plus triste, moins glamour n’est pas si facile en ces temps de vies instagramées en apparence si parfaites et si fun. Il est encore moins facile d’évoquer le sujet si tabou, sensible et intime de l’infertilité et encore moins d’emprunter le chemin du renoncement… Que la nouvelle voie/voix qui s’ouvre soit sereine et joyeuse ! Il y en a mille dans une vie à découvrir sans doute

  • dolcevita August, 23 2017, 3:32 / Reply

    Merci Garance pour cet article profond de vérité !

  • Dear dear Garance,

    I’ve been a follower of you for quite an extensive time and without sounding like a cliche or complete weirdo (you know those words will be followed by that exact thing, right??) I truly feel like Ive changed and grown with you. When I first read your blog I was a little puppy dying to make it in the so called fashion industry and was a secretly admiring your work and all the crazy things that came with it. (the weird parties, the book launches, etc etc) Without ever getting a ticket to a show I’ve also managed to sneak into a few (ok, a lot actually) and taste a little of the magic.

    I grew up a little, life happend, things happend, a bad break up for example, and I also felt less connected to that once dreamland called “fashion”.

    And then I became ill. Like seriously ill. Stuff you only read in magazines type of ill. The “we dont know if we can fix you” kind of ill. It did a lot to my body with a lot of not so pretty, not so nice side effects. Still trying to find some way to deal with it I all of a sudden read your very personal story last week and now your personal note. It just hit me, Im not the only one out there. (thats the cliche, I’m sorry) but all I wanted to say is thank you for being brutally honest, it makes you even more like-able and it really really helped me a lot. You sometimes really need someone to burst that bubble called life without making you feel like you are the one who lost.

    So long story short: thank you.



  • Michelle Polster August, 23 2017, 6:20 / Reply

    This was a really important read for me, thank you!

  • Chère Garance
    Je vous lis depuis très longtemps et je me permets de vous écrire après avoir lu l’article sur l’horloge biologique sur Rue89. Je voulais simplement vous dire que je suis passée par tout ça aussi et qu’aujourd’hui (à 45 ans), je sais que ne pas avoir eu d’enfant a été la chance de ma vie. La chance de ne pas reproduire l’éducation névrotique, chaotique, catastrophique que j’ai subie. La chance de pouvoir me reconstruire et m’occuper de moi – beaucoup – et de mon mari et de mon couple – aussi. La chance de faire une belle carrière: mes amies devenues mères ont toutes payé très cher le choix de faire des enfants ET de travailler. La chance de disposer de temps et d’énergie pour faire autre chose que du gardiennage, des soins, de l’écoute, de donner de soi, encore et encore, et cela uniquement parce que la société (ça existe?) ou les gens (mais qui s’occupe de savoir ce que pensent les gens?) considèrent que les femmes sont là pour ça. J’ai toujours refusé, absolument, cette injonction (bien qu’ayant essayé d’avoir un enfant), et je sais que cela a été et reste une source de liberté absolue. Je vous souhaite encore beaucoup de belles histoires, votre travail est extraordinaire, merci pour tout.

  • Merci « MAYOU » pour votre témoignage encourageant pour des femmes qui comme moi (42 ans) feront leur vie sans enfant, mais entourées de leurs amis et leur famille. J’ai souvent l’impression de ne pas être dans la norme, mais j’avance et essaie de construire une vie en privilégiant d’autres bonheurs que celui de voir grandir ses enfants.
    Merci Garance de partager avec nous ces sujets si compliqués à gérer parfois, par peur de paraître faible sans doute ? Bonne route, elle est encore longue et belle !

  • Garance, thank you for writing this! I’ve been following your blog when you first started and fell in love with your honest, beautiful, funny, witty, engaging (I could continue) style that speaks to the heart of reader :) I wish you could write here more frequently (or maybe publish another book?!) You writing is pure joy :)

  • just now reading this post, Garance (lol yes I was looking for your personal essays!) and it is so perfect and timely as I ponder what success really means to me, what friendships in NYC really look like and what kind of life i’d really like to have. (i don’t think it involves white walls and fluffy rugs, funny enough. and definitely not a hint of millennial pink.)

    i’d love to hear your thoughts on summer instagram use! sounds delightful.

    i hope you’re loving your home and snuggling your man and enjoying the beach.

  • georgina August, 26 2017, 6:57 / Reply

    Dear Garance

    I have just read your article in The Times about the period of your life in which you tried for a baby. I have read many happy ending stories about this. Nothing I have read before (and I have read a lot) describes so perfectly how I felt about my own experiences of this (also with no happy ending). Thank you for being so honest.

  • Chère Garance,
    Merci pour cette belle histoire et votre honnêteté. Montrer sa faiblesse et savoir en parler c’est une force exceptionnelle car moi même je viens et je suis en train passer une étape pas facile dans ma vie mais je vais tout faire pour en sortir et me retrouver moi même.
    J’espère que j’aurais bientôt le plaisir de lire votre 2ème ouvrage.
    Je vous souhaite plein de bonheur pour votre avenir et je suis sûre que la vie sera encore plus belle pour vous.

  • So needed this Garance! Started doing my own thing about 3 months ago, and I’m creatively fulfilled and happier than ever, my business itself is taking SO LONG to get going. So while I feel so happy, I also feel like I’m failing a bit as well. You are so right – I don’t think you ever feel like you’ve ‘made it’, no matter how successful you are.

    You look/sound really happy, and the snippets you do post seem to confirm this, so as just 1 of your loyal fans, that’s all I need :) Who you are permeates everything in Atelier Doré so much that it never feels like you’re too far away. But loved the update too.

  • I love receiving letters from Lenny, thank you very much for your contribution, your story was…well, thank you for sharing (seriously) ?

    It’s so weird, because everytime I realise something (about life, people, myself, etc…), you write an article about it (which makes me feel like I’m not alone, and therefore, not crazy ! haha).

    As for the latest changes in your life, the more you feel comfortable with yourself, so more beautiful you are.
    So as one of my favourite character on Insecure would say : If you like it, I love it ! GET YOURS ?

  • je me retrouve complètement dans les dernières lignes, le voyage ne s’arrête pas, il dure toute la vie, les bifurcations, changements de direction, ratés et bonheurs font partie de la vie, il n’y a effectivement pas un moment où l’on est arrivé, sauf à la fin… !

  • Cet article me parle tellement… A 28 ans, cela fait quelques années que j’ai mis des mots sur ce syndrome de “la bonne élève” : faire ce que l’on attend de nous. C’est intériorisé et difficile d’en sortir. Bravo et merci Garance d’avoir verbalisé cela !

  • Hello Garance, thank you for this post. It truly spoke to me and to the issues I’m facing today. Ive been wondering why I feel low so often, and why I seem to be getting sick or hurting my back or whatever and you’ve really hit on th causes behind all that. You’re amazing and thank you again for sharing. Can’t wait for more.
    Love, Debbie

  • Une (bonne) amie vient de m’envoyer ton texte… En plein dans le mille. Merci.

  • Andreea May, 2 2019, 11:26 / Reply

    My dear… i haven’t been in touch with you for a long time now and the other day i started reading an article from your diary and could not stop reading until i finished them all. You are addictive !!!
    Congrats for the courage you have to end things that don’t align to your values anymore and be able to share them to the world. A real act of bravery!

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