9 years ago by
Sometimes we have ideas about ourselves that turn out to be completely false. Take me, for example – lately I’ve realized I’m totally wrong when I say…
I like to be alone.
I have a friend that’s single and I always used to say to her: “But it’s great to go on vacation by yourself, are you kidding, I dream of doing that!” Until the day I decided to make that dream a reality by going alone to Bali to reevaluate my life a few summers ago.
I understood pretty quickly why she made a face when I was waxing poetics about solitude.
I arrived, feeling thrilled, I got settled in my room (I’d been careful to choose a gorgeously sublime hotel, of course) and I was radiating joy and congratulating myself for being an accomplished, independent, and even adventurous woman (Yeah right, maybe a palace survivor or something).
I started my journal with grand words on life and the wonders of being alone, I went to a yoga class to reconnect with my deep inner self, I had a massage to release all the tension of my suuuuper stressful life, and after a day and a half, me, my new age B.S. and my me me me, all started to get bored to death.
I was lucky, though, because I connected really quickly with a great girl (vive the blog!) named Bella, who had grown up in Bali, and she literally saved my vacation. Three days later, I was partying at her house and running all over Bali with her and her friends.
That trip taught me to completely de-romanticize the idea of traveling solo. And to stop saying stupid things to my friends (“I dream of going on vacation alone!”) when I don’t know what I’m talking about. Ok ok, I do know some people who really do like to vacation alone.
But it’s not as easy as it looks. For me, solitude is good in little bits at a time. Like, for a few hours. I need to share with others, meet people, and talk. And party! I’m just a deeply social person. I know, I probably could have just asked you all, you could have told me!
I’m a city girl.
It’s probably my childhood in Corsica, in a small town with a kind of well, a small town mentality that inspired my fascination for the big cities.
But if I were actually a city girl, I’d take advantage of the city more often. In my opinion, a city girl is someone like my friend Delphine. She rides her bike everywhere. She always knows about the latest exhibits, shops, and cultural events, and she’s always trying new restaurants.
Me, I’m not a very good city dweller. After the initial discovery period where I pounded the pavement from East to West and North to South, now I’m the one who always misses art shows (even the ones that last six months) and I’m still faithful to the same restaurants I liked at the beginning (sure, I’ve tried new ones, but I’m definitely not laying in wait) and I’m always trying to come up with a plan to get out of the city.
It took me a long time to realize, but maybe (probably) one day, I’ll go live in a more relaxed place with simpler pleasures, like going swimming whenever I want, like when I lived in Corsica – and I’ll go back to the city for inspiration, I’ll fill up on its energy and creativity (I’ve just come back from Tokyo, such an incredible city, so inspiring, so vibrant!) I’ll go to all the art shows, and people will call me a country bumpkin, hahaha.
Because as we all know, it’s when we visit a city that we actually have time to take advantage of all it has to offer. When we live there, we just endure it. Except for the true city girls who love it to death, like Delphine!
I’m crazy about fashion.
No, it’s true, I do love fashion. For a long time, I didn’t raise an eyebrow when people talked about my “passion for fashion” (I love how that sounds in English – you have to say it with a posh English accent haha) But I think saying I’m crazy about fashion is a bit of an exaggeration. For some people, fashion is an all-consuming passion, a religion, a lifestyle.
Me, I’m not a huge fan of shopping. I have a theory about this: it’s not that I don’t like shopping, it’s just that there are very few shops that really inspire me. In Tokyo, I can tell you, I was pretty much walking around with my debit card in my teeth, that’s how excited I was to buy things there. But despite all the efforts of online stores, I have a hard time getting inspired when I shop online. Seeing millions of clothes in pack shots just doesn’t excite me.
I’ve known girls who are truly crazy about fashion, and nothing stops them. They know their credit card number by heart, they can see themselves in clothes without trying them, and they always have a good reason to want a new pair of shoes.
But not me, so much.
I love beautiful clothes, but having too many makes me dizzy, like eating a meal that’s too rich. Super sophisticated fashion series with geometric poses in magazines make me ask questions about the meaning of life (when are you supposed to wear that? To go where?) And my favorite style is always the simplest and most relaxed.
That’s why I started this blog by taking photos of people in the street. After that, street style kind of exploded, and people started asking me questions in interviews like: “Since you’re such a fashion addict, can you tell us some of your shopping secrets?” “Hmmmm, uhhhh…buy less?” because basically what I was looking for from the beginning was cool fashion on real girls.
When I see friends who are editors or bloggers, the pleasure they get out of creating outfits, spending hours online looking for good deals…all of that makes me tired just thinking about it, so I think, no, I’m actually not so crazy about fashion after all. At least not in that way.
When I like something, I wear it every day, in a million different ways. My recent love for white Repetto Zizi’s has been causing some serious Instagram problems, by the way. The other day, I swear I told myself people were going to think I only had one pair of shoes, which shows 1/ my modern stupidity and 2/ how social media pushes us all to consume more.
I love fashion for what it says about us. I like fashion that makes a person beautiful and doesn’t draw attention to itself, I like when it reveals something about your personality. I like clothing that has patina, I’m not always running after new things every month. I like to see the same piece of clothing more than once on a person, and I like to think I carry my handbags often enough that they’ve kind of become a part of me.
It’s funny, don’t you think? The ideas we have about ourselves, whether they come from other people labeling us, or we’ve created them all by ourselves… What about you? Do you have ideas like that about yourself?
Translated by Andrea Perdue.
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Hello garance, je comprends tout a fait ton point de vue sur la solitude! Je me dit toujours que j’adore être seule et pouvoir vraiment me détendre et prendre tu temps en dehors de toute l’agitation quotidienne, mais c’est vrai qu’après quelques heures, je ne peux pas m’empêcher d’envoyer un texto a mes amies pour faire quelque chose! Du coup je dejeune une fois par semaine seule (j’adore!) c’est pas long mais ca me permet de souffler… Bisous :)
On a malheureusement toujours des préjugés sur les gens… et sur soi-même ! Ce qui est bien c’est de s’en rendre compte afin d’évoluer. C’est comme ça qu’on avance, en apprenant sur soi. Lorsque l’on se connait mieux, on est plus ouvert aux autres et donc moins aptes à avoir des idées reçues.
Joli post Garance, et drôle !
Thank you for your honesty! I had already a few vactions alone and I remember that they were indeed challenging … it is not so easy to be alone.
xx Rena
http://www.dressedwithsoul.com
Ce que je te comprends ! Moi on pense souvent à tord que je suis timide. Ok je ne suis pas la fille extravagante mais delà à être timide il y a un fossé, les gens sont d’ailleurs surpris quand ils apprennent à me connaitre.
Rien à voir mais cette illustration est top ! :)
Amélie
https://charlesrayandcoco.wordpress.com
So, so true! I’m feeling the excat same way as far as being/travelling alone and city vs. country. I live in Berlin and grew up in a small village. Just yesterday I thought: one day, I’ll be back for good. And as far as being/ travelling alone: I always thought of me being some lonesome, independent woman- since a year or so I am happiest when surrounded by my loved ones. Thanks for this beautiful piece, Garance. I think becoming older is becoming more of who we really are. Cheers to that!
Excellent post Garance. Reset and restart :)
If you had not gone alone on that trip, maybe you had not clicked with Bella, and had not gone on party with her, and had not met their friends. You do someWe are never really alone, are our ideas that limit us. Sometimes that’s a necessary evil, you did something new, without the need or guarantee of a couple with you.
Mi piace molto questo post! Riflette il mio stesso modo di essere, di pensare! Ecco perché mi piace Garance Dore, …..sono passati anni, ma resta il mio punto di riferimento preferito! :-)
MR
Labels! Ideas! They help us shape ourselves to who we want to be and where we want to go, and yet they can be such a burden as well. They create expectations that have no real reason to exist. I totally feel you on the city girl/country girl thing. One way I’ve found to stop fretting over that is that some city people find it refreshing to talk to me, a farm girl, about what I did for fun or work growing up. But then again, people then sometimes get glamorized ideas of country life… and the “ideas” perpetuate further.
We’ll all find a happy medium someday. I think it happens when we stop worrying about “who we are” and just be, love, and continue to grow and change as our lives carve out the path they are meant to follow.
Dans le registre “je m’auto-évalue régulièrement” et “je fais un check-up de qui je suis, qui j’aime et quoi faire”, tu t’en sors plutôt très bien!
Il y a quelques idées qu’on se fait de soi et les idées que les autres se font de vous en fonction du métier, de l’âge, du physique, etc….
Ce qui ressort de ce billet, et d’autres précédents, c’est que tu es éclectique, que tu t’intéresses à pas mal de choses et que tu ne veux pas rester/être mise dans une boîte, boîte où d’autres se trouvent/trouveraient très bien. Tu es toi, c’est tout et c’est très bien.
As always, thank you for being so relatable. It’s hard to be honest with ourselves about things when everything and everyone around us is pushing us to like certain things, be certain ways, and do certain activities. Maybe turning 40 is giving you the freedom to let some of these things go :)
Great post, it is always so wonderful to read your genuine voice. Yes, I have learned as I’ve grown up not to make pronouncements about who I am because I just end up sounding ridiculous. It’s best to let who you are be evident for itself in your style and actions. Love your realization that you aren’t into fashion, but you know what you like.
Is this a new drawing? Do you still sketch as you have before? As a reader for all of the years, I recognize drawings that are re-used recently and started to wonder if your creativity is channeled in a different direction. By the way, have you read Twyla Tharp’s book about creativity? You would really love it.
Sashi, I do one new illustration a week on average, which is what I’ve done for a few years now!
We reuse illustrations only for mini posts, all the main content is original :)
I am soooo glad about what you say about fashion! I am working in fashion industry almost my entire career, but I just can’t imagine myself buying new stuff all the time like the ‘real fashionista’. I am very happy we share the same thoughts and find out that I can love fashion, but at the same time, not crazy about it.
And yes, I also agree ‘buy less’ is one great idea to be chic!
Lots of love from Shanghai!
http://bigeativy.com/
“I’m not always running after new things every month” –> Same !
My friends always think i have full of items but the truth is I just manage to mix or customize my favorite clothes with creativity. Call me Dj Clothes :) ! haha
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_aX3BDSiiIY
C.
Très belle illustration! J’aime beaucoup aussi le thème du post, ces idées qu’on a sur soi-même et dans lesquelles on essaie finalement de cadrer, sans vraie raison…
Garance! Another fantastic post. I completely agree with 1 & 2, 100%. I’ve often traveled alone to random places in this world out of necessity. Friends are too busy, I didn’t (or haven’t) had a partner, etc. and my mantra has always been, that’d I’d rather do it alone than not do it at all. So off I went. But most recently I was in Cambodia; I was exhausted from delays and missed connections (not on my end) and a lack of sleep that when I got there and spent a few days, I broke down in my hotel room. I slept for an eternity due to jet lag and I realized that I just didn’t want to be travelling alone anymore. With regards to being a city girl, I have always thought of myself in that way. I grew up in a small town and dreamed of the day that I finally could get out and live in a big city (if not NY). For the past 8 years I’ve been in Manhattan I definitely don’t take advantage of everything. I’m a homebody, I work a lot, I just want peace and quiet. For all the art shows, exhibits, and culture this city offers (and that I love) I could be taking advantage of it more. Lately, I’ve been getting out of the city more and more on the weekends and my dreams of leaving (something I NEVER thought would happen) are becoming stronger and stronger.
Jen, we’re basically the same! Ahahah :)
Super article ! C’est marrant pour moi être folle de mode ce n’est pas forcément être folle de shopping. La mode c’est aussi apprécier le savoir-faire, la création, la direction artistique, le stylisme, la couture, la fashion week, etc. Et pour le coup je pense être folle de mode oui ;)
En tous cas ça fait du bien un post plein de sincérité et de fraîcheur, merci du partage ! :)
Absolument, on confond souvent les deux…!
La fausse folle de mode, on aurait pu te le dire aussi… C’est d’ailleurs pour ça qu’on aime ton travail! ton blog est une source d’inspiration pour les filles de la vraie vie, celles qui remettent souvent (et gardent même d’une année à l’autre) les pièces qui leur vont bien, qui préfèrent l’allure à la nouveauté, qui veulent être mises en valeur et pas éclipsées par ce qu’elles portent, et oublier totalement leur tenue une fois sorties du dressing :) merci!
Aimer la mode et aimer acheter des vêtements, c’est un peu différent en fait.
J’aime pourtant faire les magasins. J’en ai un peu honte mais j’aime. Regarder, toucher, imaginer, calculer, se projeter.
Ça m’étonne toujours, les filles ultra-sapées qui disent détester faire du shopping [ce n’est pas ce que tu dis]. C’est un peu vulgaire c’est vrai. Mais pousser la porte d’une boutique, trouver un secret, rencontrer un vêtement,… J’aime ça.
such a great read — I also really like being alone. Something so nice about having time to myself and getting to know me
http://hashtagliz.com
Je pense qu’on a tous de fausses idées sur soi même et c’est la maturité qui nous apprend à nous en défaire et à savoir qui nous sommes vraiment !
Moi aussi j’ai souvent pensé que faire un voyage toute seule serait super cool mais je ne l’ai jamais fait et avec le temps j’en ai de moins en moins envie !
Venant d’une ville de province j’ai rêvé de vivre dans une grande ville, ce que j’ai fait par la suite et je suis retournée en province et cela me correspond davantage, bien que j’aime l’énergie des grandes villes et m’y ressourcer de temps en temps ( ça parait un peu bizarre de se ressourcer dans une ville non? mais bon je suis comme ça ).
Concernant la mode j’ai la même vision que toi il me semble, je ne suis pas dans la surconsommation mais trouver de jolies pièces que je vais pouvoir porter, reporter différemment m’intéresse davantage.
Merci pour ce post!
Christine
J’aime beaucoup ce post qui reflete tout a fait ce que je pense, les trois chapitres resonnent de verite !
J’ai pousse un soupir d’aise lorsque j’ai vu que c’etait un post ecrit par Garance. Je les attends toujours avec impatience et plaisir. Les illustrations sont une belle inspiration fashion. :=)
Very funny, Garance! Apropos for me, too, as at age 53 I decided to “be more modern” and learn about New Age. I am one week into a “Gratitude Meditation Experience”, and when I listen to it, it all sounds so sublime. And yet in real life I have never had such a disastrous week! I decided yesterday I had to stop listening to the meditations as they seem to have screwed up my mojo!
As for fashion, I am not a “natural” like you, it is very difficult for me to put together outfits that work, for some reason. I long for the days of yore (!) when women had fewer choices, maybe one or two dress styles (although you could choose your own color and fabric at the dressmakers) and you didn’t need a PhD in fashion to put together a wardrobe.
Interesting post, I have to admitt that after 30 years of frequent business travelling I do like to travel SOLO. I mean, without associates of mine. Therefore I feel free to pick my favorite resataurants, my favourite hotels, follow my routine of early morning running and early nights.
I still enjoy the few times yearly my wife is joinig me and I would like also my kids, but being them 19 and 23 they rather like to travel with their friends instead of their parents.
I totally share your opinion on the shopping, I like good clothes but I don’t exeede. I stick on the conservative side for business reasons and personal tastes.
Sky blue shirts, blazers, navy suits and I do indulge on cachemire V-neck sweaters in particular from the brand Ballantyne.
I need to control myself on the sport gear (cycling and running) , I tend to be weak on that and my wife complains on the amount of stuff I own, but what can I say, every season these sports brands are coming out with something new and appealing.
I love reading your posts. How you write feels like just chatting at a coffee shop and it’s easy and effortless. I agree about shopping and instagram problems when you’re obsessed with something. I buy a dress I love and want to wear it for every exciting thing I do the next week (which is when I also want to take instagram pics).
– Kaitlyn | http://www.TheCrownFox.com
I pretty much could have written this article! Except that maybe I was already a little more aware of these “lies” about myself, haha. Love this.
First j’adooore ce dessin, Le graphisme est top vraiment ! Est-ce sa position, ce face à face … genre maintenant on Remet le compteur à zéro ! .J’appelle çà les moments “zen stick” quand tu te rends compte, que bah non t’es pas ce que tu crois être. Notre égo nous balade et nous raconte une histoire, tu joues un rôle et un jour, non merci hop la vie se charge de nous dégriser, Tout est une affaire de “croyances” et de cycles çà va çà vient.
You get comfortable with who you are with age, much like with a favourite pair of well-worn well-loved jeans [Is it wrong to use a fashion simile for this post?] ;)
I am a person who needs to connect and share experiences with others but I’m also protective of my core self. I’m allergic to group think, for example, and terrified of being swallowed up by the whole. Doses of alone time help me anchor myself.
I’ve never seen myself as a “fashion person” because I dislike shopping, like comfort too much and am never compelled to have the latest trend. I also don’t “do make-up” and this has always seemed to twin itself to fashion. The casualness of your blog makes me feel that there is a space for messy hair, no make-up gals who like to look cool but not precious.
Hi Garance!
I can completely relate to your mention on fashion. I like to say that I prefer less clothes in my closet. I think more flexible pieces make for millions of outfits! Im learning that buying less clothes but good quality is the best policy. I can never last shopping for clothes for more than two hours, and I love to give clothes away. My only issue is my mom always buys me more. Lol her concept of fashion is a little different from mine. ;p thank you for this post! I really enjoyed reading.
First of all, I love what you said. You are awesome.
I have traveled A LOT alone. My super rich clients had me everywhere for most of my 30’s (I’m a chef) and it was the experience that made me who I am today. You find yourself more gregarious than you could ever imagine, meeting people you may have never met tied to someone else… I have friends from New Zealand to New York that I met stomping around the world alone! I’ve randomly cooked a dinner-service in a no-name restaurant on the island of Waiheke because I said hello to a couple of slightly drunk chefs in a vineyard, I will never forget a day like that, and the stories go on. It made my experience of moving to LA (10 years ago) so much easier because I knew I could have fun anywhere and meet friends everywhere I went. It’s important to venture out on your own and meet new people!
Who am I, I don’t know. But I like traveling alone. As long as you’re open, you’re never alone. I understand one could feel lonely, though.
A big AMEN especially to the last part about fashion. I couldn’t agree more. To me it seems that there are several different ways of having a “passion for fashion”. Some interpret that as having the latest It-Bag and being clad in head-to-toe runway looks. Then there are others who appreciate the way people make outfits out of everything, even re-inventing the same shirt or Repettos over and over again ;)
And that’s what I really appreciate as well and what I consider to be at the core of my personal passion for fashion. Now that I’m working at a fashion magazine during a hot, hot HOT summer, I’ve found myself conflicted and stressing over things like “I can’t wear this dress/these shorts/ these sandals again because they’ll think it’s the only thing I own.”
Slowly getting over that ;)
Sophia
http://www.sacdujour.de
But isn’t this exactly the sort of thing that only happens when you are traveling alone!?
“I was lucky, though, because I connected really quickly with a great girl (vive the blog!) named Bella, who had grown up in Bali, and she literally saved my vacation. Three days later, I was partying at her house and running all over Bali with her and her friends.”
I think solo travel allows you to be open to opportunities and connections you may not have been if you were with a travel companion.
The reason why I love your blog is because of your openness and honesty (and your amazing photos & illustrations of course). Thank you Thank you for this post! Sometimes I feel a bit out of the loop or too afraid to travel alone…like it’s some modern-day-woman-phenomenon & I didn’t get the memo. I feel the same way you do (alone time is valuable but it’s so much fun to share and party!) Ironic though, that the best part of going away alone is meeting new people, happily not being alone :) I have a friends who travel alone or go to concerts solo, only to find themselves having the best time linking up with fellow travelers or fellow fans. It’s part of the adventure i guess.
Thank you for giving us a chance to relate to you.
In about two weeks I’m going to move to a big city at the other end of my country… It’s my hometown, but I’ve spent the last eight years living in a very relaxed small town near a big lake where you can go swimming all the time (at least during the summer). I’m happy about the upcoming move for various reason, but it definitely makes me reevaluate all those conceptions I had about where I’m at and what I like. Do I actually really want to live in the city, in the thick of it – or rather in a place where it’s green and I can hear myself think? What do I wish to do differently, what do I want to keep? What will I miss and what will I leave behind, gladly or not so gladly? Who are the people I really want to stay in touch with – and will be very careful about actually making some effort (and yes, there are other people where I’m not sure I care that much at all)?
Hello!
But the main reason of going on vacation alone is to meet new people (not to be alone with me+myself+I)… isn’t it?!
Well I believe even in vacations the key word is to… balance your time with your self and others ;)
Best wishes for a wonderful summer time!
Garance, che bel disegno! Tu es unique! C’est tout juste ce que tu dis etre moi meme dans mes fringues c’est top importante, mais l’elegance par exemple di Faye Dunaway in “The mr Thomas Crowe affair”…simple e coloré!
Très bon post Garance!
Ton premier paragraphe m’a fait sourire… moi qui adore VRAIMENT la solitude. Celle qui est souvent injoignable via son portable et qui rappelle une fois sur deux c’est moi ;))) …Je voyage souvent seule (ce qui met à l’épreuve les nerfs de mes proches) manger au resto seule, aller au cinéma seule ne me pose aucun souci, c’est tellement naturel pour moi.
Sinon comme disait un commentaire précédemment, je crois qu’on a une vision de soi de plus en plus juste avec la maturité et lorsque qu’on a le désir sincère d’être honnête avec soi-même et avec les autres.
This post explains why I have kept coming back to your blog, almost every day over several years. Your honesty continues to be refreshing and inspiring :)
Je vois bien ce que tu veux dire Garance, on évolue aussi, et on a des “périodes” ou on peu se surprendre.
Mais à mon age , je dois avoir une décennie supplémentaire d’historique de moi même, je sais parfaitement qui je suis, hélas… et je ne me réserve plus beaucoup de surprises.
Et pour la solitude en vacances, suis assez d’accord avec ce que tu dis. Je me suis fait 10 jours de rêve seule au Sri Lanka en avril dernier, alors ok j’ai fait le point avec moi même, mais au bout d’une semaine, j’aurais donné cher pour avoir mes copines, mon mec, ou toute autre personne humaine de la même planète que moi pour partager les beaux paysages, des rigolades, et des litres de Mojitos ! A 10 jours, je commençais à parler toute seule …
http://www.lesprecieuses.fr
Your thoughts on traveling alone are interesting. I still want to do it. I didn’t in my twenties but now that I’m in my thirties I want to try it. I’m sure that it can overwhelming but the fun part being able to do whatever you want without having someone shitting all over your plans.
Certainly true about what happened in Tokyo. Thank you so much for sharing. You are so lovely.
J’aime beaucoup cette phrase “…j’aime penser que je porte assez mes sacs pour qu’ils fassent un peu partie de moi.” ; ça dit tout !!!
This may be my favourite post from you! It completely resonates with me, from the small town girl in a big city to my “passion for fashion” but I get bored shopping. Love it!
Mon idée reçue sur moi depuis que je suis toute petite: je suis hyper sociable.
Idée qui m’a fait choisir mes études (psycho), puis mon métier (attachée de presse). Pourtant aujourd’hui, je préfère nettement me faire des soirées ou weekends où je ne vois que mes homies (en gros, mon mec et mon cercle fermé de 3/4 amis intimes) et on refait le monde autour d’une table chez l’un de nous ou au dernier restau fétiche.
Ce coté tribu me rassure, les choses changent peu, on se connait, on se fait rire, on s’aime. Je suis toujours en mode chien méchant quand un intrus arrive dans la bande (pour être super fan quelques heures plus tard… ou pas).
Finalement c’est pas si sociable que ça, voire pas du tout même. Et le réaliser m’angoisse presque.
Parce que, quand on est PR, dans la mode en plus, ben ça fait très bizarre de se rendre compte qu’on s’éloigne de l’idée qu’on a toujours eu sur soi (“Je suis Samantha de SATC le coté débridé en moins”).
D’où le gros questionnement de la 30aine, si je ne suis plus sociable, qu’est-ce-que je suis? qu’est-ce-que je fais?…
Pfiouuu… et donc encore une fois, grosse pression pour mes vacances à Bali (tu n’aides pas Garance avec ton témoignage hi hi) pour me (re)trouver.
Mais une chose reste sûre, il y’a des idées que j’ai sur moi qui continuent d’être vraies, comme aimer dénicher et analyser les tendances, la mode, tout ce qui rend le monde un peu plus beau. Et ça, j’aime que ce soit toujours aussi important pour moi!
Xoxo à toute l’équipe,
From Montmartre,
with love,
AL
Ann-Louise, c’est hyper intéressant, et je pense qu’on peut trouver des moyens d’être soi-même en évoluant dans sa carrière. Bon voyage, Bali, c’est hyper cool. J’ai un guide sur le blog si tu veux d’ailleurs !
Thank you dear :))
Et oui mon guide Bali by Garance est déjà imprimé et fin prêt! (Comme pour chaque voyage que je fais où tu as proposé un city guide d’ailleurs! Rome, New York, Milan, Miami (MERCIIII pour le Tap Tap!)…
D’ailleurs, je croise les doigts pour un city-guide sur Hawaï :))))
Bises et Happy friday!
Please…go back to shooting people on the street. Those were so inspirational. Real people who wear real mixed up clothing. I’m not nearly so inspired by the picture perfect fashion set.
Je ne saurais mieux dire… CQFD. Ca a un écho troublant en moi ces constations. Je partage EXACTEMENT les mêmes. Concernant Instagram, je suis d’accord, dans ce miroir aux narcissismes, tout pousse à la surenchère, à la surconsommation et paradoxalement à un certain appauvrissement visuel et créatif. Tout est nivelé. J’avais d’ailleurs beaucoup aimé un post que tu avais fait à ce sujet.
Trust me Garance, we will never think you own ONLY ONE pair of shoes, ever !
This account is very interesting to read.
I have a question for you though. You talked about fashion. And immediately talked about shopping. I have had a recent life changing epiphany that fashion is not equal to shopping. Fashion is a craft. Shopping is just consumerism. It was quite liberating. I still learn about textiles, design process, who is changing the way women dress, how to pair things, etc without wanting to shop for it all. What are your thoughts on it ? Fashion Vs shopping ?
– Archana.
With 55 summers, I’ve learnt to allow comfort to underpin my style! I expect my clothes to last for years, even my t-shirts. This summer, I’ve been living in loose navy tees and rolled up navy shorts. The greatest impact on my sense of style over the past eight months has been my dachshund puppy Harry. Where I go Harry cones too. I now take a backpack with me and never feel alone. A year ago, I enjoyed all that the city had to offer, now I collect maps, put on my best hiking shoes and set off. Nature informs my choice of clothing, but my sense of style remains personal to me. With Harry by my side I’ve meet so many people, people who I may never have spoken to previously. I still love to pull an outfit together depending on where I go, or what I’m doing. However, nature has a huge impact on my wellbeing in a way that fashion alone could never do. Walking with Harry is like walking with a lovely mobile sculpture, ever changing, always inspirational.
At (nearly) forty-eight, I have few illusions left about myself. Which is SO nice…I really didn’t enjoy sorting them out in my twenties and thirties.;) I don’t prefer to travel alone, but I have done it and it’s not terrible. I like being alone – I didn’t marry until I was in my early thirties, and before that the last time I lived with someone was a prior boyfriend (very briefly) and my college roommate when I was a teenager. I like my own space a lot. And while I like most other people…I’m very happy by myself (which seems unbelievable to so many people I know).
I used to think that I was a “more is more” girl…but the older I get, less really IS more. Less clutter, more open space. Less clothing, more room for things I truly love, instead of cheap junk taking up space in the closet. Less processed / junk food, more good moods – sugar and all that processed stuff really does a whammy on my body.
Just a few examples. Occasionally I come across something that surprises me – I like to think that I am still open to changing my mind in situations – but mostly I know who I am, what I care about (and what I don’t), what battles I’m willing to fight and what I’m willing to let go. It’s rather a wonderful place to be. :)
The funny side of travellng alone is actually meeting people and not being alone; if not it could turn into Le Rayon Vert (the first part, not the part about meeting some handsome stranger) I’m a loner but travelling alone force me to be more out there than when I am my usual self. I’m too self consious to be alone on my vacation, please I would be drunk and crying in my hotel room by the second night.
I always thougt of myself as a city girl too, but I’m never happier than when I’m in Cabo Polonio disconnected of the world, sleeping to the sound of the sea, whith nothing in my mind except if I’m going to buy fish or shrimp to the local fishermen. Love when the pace of life connects with the pace of nature.
Oh, how little we think about what we REALLY like. I loved this post!
Lovely evolution of your and our mind ;))
Bravo!
Thanks so much for sharing. It brought into focus a lot of self-reflection I’ve been doing. I was caught up in going to the latest store openings, fashion events, constantly feeling pressure to buy more when my husband and I did a huge reevaluation of our priorities for financial reasons. It was a major revelation to discover that I find the most joy in life simple pleasures: Time with family, growing my urban vegetable garden, reading and writing. Now when I get to dress up for an event it’s a pleasure without pressure because I know where my true priorities are.
“Hmmmm, uhhhh…buy less” :-)
I loved this post!
I so relate to this article! I too went to Bali(alone) last year, inspired by some crazy idea that this would be transformative and proof of my strength and independence. At first it felt like that but within a few days I was bored and hated to admit it, lonely. Towards the end of the trip I was tired of navigating solo in what were often not the safest situations and was exhausted. Feeling sorry for myself I went to the Monkey Forest in Ubud as I thought that would cheer me up. This was not what happened as I was attacked and bitten by a monkey (fortunately on the ankle) and spent the night at the “hospital.” As I lay in the cold ER room waiting for doctors who didn’t speak English I began to cry. I realized that yes, I can do that and anything else alone, but why would I want to? Small bits are necessary but life and most certainly the big, memorable parts are so much richer when shared with people you love. Lesson learned…:)
Oh gosh Janna, what a story !!! But what’s up with women and Bali !??? ;))
Hands down, my favourite post EVER! Style is something that doesn’t necessarily equate to ‘shopping’, or even ‘fashion’ per say. I grew up on Cockatoo Island, an island in the middle of Sydney harbour. I spent so much of my childhood roaming ship yards, exploring submarines, old convict jails, feeding the island’s stray cats, swimming in dry docks and countless hours practicing piano to become a composer. Most of this time alone! Fast forward, I spend the majority of my time alone, in my dark studio, with my Burmese cats, writing music, but I found my partner in crime (my husband) who, like me, is a bit of a loner, albeit a very creative one! I’ve lived in big cities all my life, including Tokyo. I almost lost my marbles when I lived in the country side in England for 2 years. I thrive on the energy and multiculturalism of a city, especially in Australia, where it gets very conservative in a lot of country areas. Every city captivates you with it’s own style and energy, with it’s architecture, landscape and variety of people. To NOT have this variety of people and experiences would be hard … but I could easily live in the Pyrenees, Nice, or San Sebastián.
bonjour Garance! je ne me promène pas bcp sur votre blog mais à chaque fois que je le fais, je me demande pourquoi je ne passe pas plus souvent!! j’ai lu cet article avec le sourire tout le long et j’ai presqu’envie de vous inviter prendre un café pour en discuter tant j’ai de chose à dire… mais bon j’adore rêver! :)
Être seule et l’apprécier est un art, je pense surtout que s’isoler pour créer ou pour écrire c’est l’idéal, mais étant une miss catastrophe ( voyager seule est plus qu’une habitude pour moi) je finis toujours par me faire des amis lors de mes soit disant “besoin” de solitude! je pense que quand vous avez dit à votre amie que c’est cool de voyager seule, je pense que c’etait pour le côté aventurier. Il est vrai que quand on voyage avec un groupe, un couple ou autre, si on n’est pas du genre à connecter avec les autres, on peut vraiment raté de belle chose car on crée un cocon dans lequel on reste coincé et on rate ainsi de vivre de belles expériences.
Moi aussi j’adore la mode, mais j’en parle mal, du moins je parle des marques avec trop d’émotions, soit j’aime à la folie soit pas du tout ou moyennement!! en bonne passionnée, il est toujours plus intéressant de me rencontrer pour voir à quel point la mode me rend dada ( quand j’en parle). Mais avec le temps, je me suis rendue compte que mon jean et mon t-shirt blanc sont la parfaite combinaison de confort et chic lol. J’adore passer le temps à découvrir le comment du pourquoi est fait une collection. le choix des couleurs, du thème, des tissus. L’histoire derrière la magie créative mais acheter des vêtements en quantité, faire le shopping, avoir 100000 couleurs de chaussures et autres grrrr … rien que d’y penser je suis déjà épuisée! Alors si ça fait de moi une femme boring, so yes i am, je le confesse !
Bref je m’arrête ici… tout ça pour dire super Article Garance!
Mélissa
Je me souviens de ton voyage à Bali :D (et des photos géniales !!)
Petite coquille ” j’ai eu de la chance, parce que j’ai vite fait connecté avec une fille géniale” => fait connaissance
Je suis contente que tu sois rentrée de vacances, ça fait du bien de te lire, et là tu me fais réfléchir alors je ne réponds pas de suite haha
J’ai aussi hâte de voir tes nouvelles photos du Japon
Bon retour à NY, welcome back, grosses bises !
As always , You nailed it, Garance! When I think about it, I am, just,at this very moment, getting to terms with “alone” as not scary. It took me significant amount of time, failed relationships and friendships to realize that time spent with yourself is absolutely necessary. Going on vacation by myself is still ahead of me but few months ago I started living by myself first time ever!!! There were always significant others, friends, etc. The breakup that I have been going through this year taught me a painful but very valuable lesson, that I did not to have hundreds of friends and every weekend planned a month in advance and know every cool restaurant or a bar in NYC. Now it’s about getting to know myself and wow, it is quite challenging at times but future looks exciting and promising!
Too true, and so well said! Love your posts Garance.
you must be my twin sister ;) Hugs Garance! You are a star! Year after year I keep loving your simple, but sophisticated style and kind personality with huge sense of reality :)
Hi Garance,sounds like your feeling more and more comfortable inside yourself and so need less and less in the outside world.I think that’s a healthier way of being,generally calmer,simpler,nurturing and ultimately more fulfilling for you.there’s no pair of shoes that can give you that!! But they do bring some fun!
Garance, you are the most loveliest personnality ever! I love you and aspire to grow like you ?? Love from Canada
I am a loner, who needs company..
I am an organizer who enjoys a healthy dose of chaos.
I am a wishful thinker who works hard at everything I take on.
I am a breathing contradiction, and I embrace all of it, the good and the better.
Merci Garance, vive l’authenticite!
I too feel that social media draws us in and makes us feel we must constantly consume. It’s the opposite of appreciating what we have and lately I’m steering away from it.
oh btw – I think holidays are to be shared with great company.
http://www.lapelsandloafers.com
I´m soooo crazy about fashion I buy pieces just to admire them: Christopher Kane dress for Top Shop, Prada tye dye stilletos, Prada sky high espardilles, Valentino rock stud stilettos, Isabel Marant boots….& the list goes on
Rien n’est pire que la solitude , elle génère angoisse et chagrin et tant d’autres sentiments négatifs . j’aime le partage , l’échange , la vie près des autres .
ça fait moderne peut-être de dire qu’on aime la solitude , genre je m’assume , mais bof , c’est une posture .
pour la mode je me sens fan , mais j’achète sans folie .Moi aussi j’aime porter les mêmes vêtements souvent , qu’ils me ressemblent , qu’ils soient un peu moi…
Les villes . j’adore . Je déteste la campagne , l’isolement . Je suis le plus possible à Paris et voilà , sans état d’âmes . J’aime beaucoup l’idée de vieillir àParis , de
toujours y trouver mon bonheur….
j’aime ta sincérité Garance .Merci .
Cela fait moderne de dire qu’on aime la solitude ? Pas du tout, les romantiques du 19ème siècle adoraient la solitude, beaucoup de philosophes adorent / adoraient la solitude, beaucoup d’artistes et de scientifiques aussi. Et la plupart n’étaient pas angoissés, qu’est-ce que c’est que ces affirmations péremptoires ? Pourquoi mettre en doute les goûts des autres comme ça ? C’est très étonnant.
Troppo bello. Grazie.
THANK YOU for being so honest and expressing exactly how I’m feeling of late too. You’re fantastic … keep being you! PS: I’ve been reading your blog from the beginning and this is the only time I’ve ever written (on any blog!) as I just loved this one!
Je pense que je devrais aussi revoir mon moi profond, profondément… Ton article me laisse perplexe parce que tu as raison, on a toutes des idées reçues sur nous-même et du coup on peut vite s’égarer et passer à côté de beaucoup de choses qui nous rendraient tellement heureuses… Bon, je vais méditer moi!
Bizous et merci pour cet article!
Christelle
http://www.lipleblog.com
Hi Garance,
Enjoyed reading your honesty! I work in fashion too, although i’m happy to be in a creative industry, but part of me is always a little torn with all the concerns i have about excessive human consumption, which is what our industry is trying to promote. I think sometimes i become too complacent with the present, and assume that what i see, feel and experience now, is all that matters, and i go with the flow. But in retrospect this assumption always seems myopic.Its only when i go out there and do something that i realise more than what i thought i knew.
with love,
Jayeeta
Je crois premièrement qu’il ne faut pas se forcer à faire des trucs qu’on n’a pas envie de faire, mais je pense aussi que tu t’es un peu plantée sur ton expérience de vacances en solo. En solo, on ne va pas dans un hôtel d’où on ne bouge pas. A moins d’être trèèèèès fatiguée. En solo on prévoit vaguement un territoire à visiter, on loue une voiture, on décide plus ou moins au jour le jour, et surtout, on est libre de changer d’avis à tous bouts de champ sans demander son avis à personne, le pied! Et comme tu as pu l’expérimenter toi même, rien de mieux que d’être en solo pour rencontrer des gens, tout le monde veut te parler, et c’est tant mieux, même si parfois ces rencontres ne durent que quelques minutes.
J’ai réfléchi mais peut-être parce que j’ai quelques années de plus que toi, je crois que j’ai déjà perdu toutes les fausses idées que j’avais de moi-même. Peut-être que la dernière est de renoncer à l’idée d’être une sportive accomplie, ce que je n’ai jamais été de toutes façons mais j’aimais bien le croire. Maintenant si j’ai envie de paresser ou d’aller siroter des mojitos, l’entraînement attend le lendemain, et ce n’est pas grave du tout !
En te lisant je me disais qu’en fait, toutes les choses sur lesquelles tu te plantes sur tout même, sont les choses qui font que tu m’as l’air d’être un être humain sympathique et équilibré. Nan, sérieusement, heureusement, que tu n’est pas faite de ces grands principes coulés dans le marbre un peu cliché non? ça n’en fait de quoi que quelqu’un de plus intéressant et humain! (Ceci est une phrase gentille mais à la tournure très bizarre, merci de ne pas mal la prendre mais je n’arrive pas à la tourner autrement! :) )
Très intéressant, j´aime bien ;)
xx
Mónica
MES VOYAGES À PARIS
OMG…how refreshingly normal you sound…. xxxx LOOOVE it!xxxx
I loved your note and relate to it so much… I found myself nodding in a manner that I relate to what you are saying. I think often we like to think of ourselves in a certain manner because the pre conceived perception of an independent, powerful woman.
But we need to acknowledge that we are doing well for ourselves the way we are, being who we are and it’s good to accept that :)
Hi Garance, i think you have lived the real essence of an alone trip : making new friendship! if you were on holiday with a friend of yours, you wouldn’t have the possibility to party at a dweller’s house! ;) travelling alone doesn’t mean being alone, it just means “taking off” alone! XXX
so true
AMEN! “Qui s’habille comme ça ? Pour aller où ?” and “Vous qui êtes folle de mode, donnez-nous tous vos secrets shopping !” “Mmmmmm euuuuuh acheter moins ?” Exactly! It was such a pleasure to read this post!
C’est très intéressant et une question que je me pose beaucoup en ce moment, sans être capable de mettre les mots comme tu peux le faire dessus. Je me lance dans une aventure entrepreneuriale, qui est avant une aventure humaine et qui forcément, remet beaucoup de choses en question, en priorité mes certitudes sur moi-même, ma vision du monde… Mais je crois qu’il est encore trop tôt pour moi pour apporter mes propres réponses. Bientôt surement :)
I have discovered I am a city girl at heart. A few years ago I decided to move to a small city, almost a village. It’s been four and a half years and… I HATE IT!! I miss pollution, I miss chaos, I miss the subway! I thought I wanted quiet and peaceful and I was wrong. But hey, that’s the possitive side of this experience: I’ve realized I can change my mind. It’s ok. Making mistakes you learn who you really are. The negative thing: with this fatal European crisis I just can’t find a job back in the city. I’m stuck in this tiny town. Sigh…
PS: I totally agree with you about online shopping. I get bored and overwhelmed and I just don’t have any more shoppinglust! (I think I’ve just made up that word… but I think you can understand me…)
xx,
E.
http://www.theslowpace.com
I’ve been married twice….had boyfriends and 2 long relationships….i prefer to be single then to be in a relationship thats too compromising ….I like to be free…I’ve travel by my self….and with boyfriends …but my fav is my chihuahua ….when u r along people approach you …don’t stop going on vacation just because your friends aren’t available…i love shopping it relaxes me…and i can eat alone….nothing is going to stop me from enjoy my life…that i know is true
What did CAROLE say? I don’t understand it male or female. But seems he or she have already done great deal twice. Love You buddy… 2 long relationships………… I’m 20 but still single. I think it is better staying single.
i am female….married twice with in 5 yr crazy… when i was very young i have been single in between relationships…so i can compare…i don’t want to give the impression that single is better not at all i just choose to be now…
J’ai adoré ce post!!!! Comme tous les autres d’ailleurs!!
Tellement vous!!
Par coincidence, tellement moi…..!!!!!!
Mille merci de partager ces petits questionnements existentiels tous simples de filles en évolution :))))!!!
<3
Sefora de Paris
I went to Ubud alone for the first time in life just because all my friends are not willing to buy last-minute ticket just like me. I thought it would be fun, but turns out I need company! I love to share with my friends, chatting over dinner or simply to have someone to take your picture. I was constantly talking with friends in group chat and share my experience with them also I find it really relaxing to have someone to talk to, even with the waitress. Thank God, it’s only for the weekend.
same same Garance…
Dear Garance, thank you for this interesting reading this day! It was very exiting to read about your vacation alone. I tried this a couple of times. One side – it”s boring, otherwise it”s make me thinking a lot about everything) Sometimes we need a lot of time and good mood to be with our friends, to keep in touch with everyone. I really like to watch a good film alone)
I think traveling alone, or being alone in general, is very scary for some people because it leaves us vulnerable – alone with all of our innermost thoughts, insecurities, failures, self-judgment, etc. When we’re with people, we can forget about all these things and just have fun!
The thing I like about traveling alone is exactly what happened to you in Bali. You are open to new connections, opportunities and experiences. You are so much open than when you are in a ‘closed
loop’ with another traveling companion.
I actually really like and prefer living alone. I dreamt about it since childhood (being a twin and always sharing a room, and basically sharing everything). My dream was always to live alone and have my own place and do what I want when I want. That said, I also really don’t like traveling alone either and mostly don’t have to as if all else fails I can always travel with my twin (who loves traveling as much as I do).
I am born under the astrological sign of Cancer. They’re typically described as moody. I didn’t give it much thought because I was like, I don’t even know what that means. Years go by and I hear some people describe me as chatty, intuitive, funny. Others would describe me as just quiet. Then I thought maybe I should examine the idea of moody and maybe, just maybe moody applies to me. So yeah, I’m moody and it took me a long time to admit it.
OMG! Je te rejoins à 100% sur le troisième point: Je suis une folle de mode. À vrai dire, je n’aime pas suivre les tendances, j’aime porter ce qui me va bien et non ce que la société me dit ce qui m’irait bien à l’automne/hiver 15-16. Je suis une jeune femme de 25 ans, qui aime la simplicité, le confort dans mes tenues. Je suis toujours à l’école et je travail à la fois. C’est récamment que je me suis arrêtée sur le shopping. Je me suis dis qu’il est temps que j’arrête et que je profite de ce que j’ai dans ma garde-robe, c’est comme tu dis je veux aussi voir mes vêtements se porter sur différent jour et différente façon. On peut pratiquement créer de nouvelle tendance avec les anciennes tendances (j’ignore si cela fait du sens ce que je viens de dire mais dans ma tête tout va bien ahah!) Mise à part ce sujet de la mode, je suis une personne qui se dit plusieurs choses à mon propos mais encore pour la plupart du temps c’est totalement faux. Je commence tranquillement à me voir qui je suis vraiment. Je suis une personne si dure avec moi-même. :)
Je te rejoins complètement concernant Tokyo. J’y suis allée au mois de mai et, de ma vie, je n’ai jamais eu autant de tentations (diverses et variées) à y laisser tout mon PEL. Non seulement la ville est superbe et fascinante, mais l’atmosphère comme le contraste entre ultra modernité et traditions qui règnent sont bouleversants et remettent pas mal de choses en perspective (du moins ça a été le cas pour moi !).
Même constat concernant le shopping et la passion pour la mode !
Isn’t this growing into ourselves, the ability to be open and available and aware of the human dynamic? To realize and value the entirety of what makes up our lives, and to honor who we are and our tastes and preferences at each stage. Great post, made me think deeply on my own values and labels in the here + now.
Chère Garance, j´adore te lire. Je partage avec toi plein d´avis sur la vie et sur la mode aussi. En ce qui concerne la mode et ayant travaillé dans l´industrie,j´ai commencé à avoir l´impression d´être complétement dirigée et dévorée par les médias, les annonçants, la vitesse, la surconsommation, enfin, de manquer de liberté et de temps pour mettre au point des idées. Entre autres choses, ç´est pour ça que j´ai créé un guide de shopping online (www.thefanzynet.com) pour un lifestyle cool, beau, inspirant, un peu plus atemporel, je continue a aimer le talent et les belles choses, peut-être que ça te plaira!
J’adore ce dessin. Vraiment trop beau. Sur les trois points je suis exactement comme vous. Partie à Venise seule un jour j’étais tellement seule que j’ai pu faire l’aller-retour sur le grand canal plusieurs fois en une journée, même le soir. Maintenant je le connais par cœur. Idéal pour visiter de façon assidue (!!!) mais à part ça il vaut mieux avoir des gens à qui téléphoner…
When things get tough, tough go shopping !
Hi Garance:
I agree with most of your points but about traveling solo, I have always done it and never felt bad. Why? Probably because I have sign up for activities such as yoga classes, meetings, classes, that way I have never felt lonely. This year I am taking the Pacific Coast Starlight to go to California. I will be alone in some cities and in other I will be visiting friends.
While I’ve always known I should NOT travel alone (I’m so much of an introvert, I would never step outside of the hotel room, let alone go out and make friends with strangers), I too had pre-set ideas about the kind of person I am. Thanks to life for making us realize the things that are important to us are not always the things we thought about! Who we think we are is often a construct of how other people view us or wish we were. It takes time to shift through all these notions and decide which ones truly apply to us.
PS: beautiful illustration by the way!
Chère Garance, cela doit faire une éternité que je n’ai pas posté un commentaire sur un site internet (roulement de tambour) mais je me suis senti convié de le faire à la lecture de ton article. Il est rare de trouver aujourd’hui une telle fraicheur dans l’écriture, une honnêteté désintéressée du contenu sur des plateformes éditoriales relatives au lifestyle. Les prescripteurs et éditeurs journalistes (ce que je suis) confortent et conforterons toujours leurs consommateurs / lecteurs dans une idée superficielle et étymologiquement éloignée du « cool » et de son sens au travers de mises en scènes sophistiquées et distanciées ou en relatant un style de vie au néo-minimalisme modeux à base de filtres Instagram tirant sur le noir et blanc, de Stan Smith et gorgées de Flat White (oui bon… c’est aussi très bon!) servant une terre aride d’égos interchangeables et socialement valorisés qui consomment la culture par l’image positive qu’elle peut leur renvoyer. La mode, le design, l’art sont entre autres des disciplines qui facettent notre vie. Des « life enhancers » nous confortent et nous donnent au quotidien ou de temps en temps du challenge, nous ouvrent des portes et nous poussent chaque jour à être soi-même face à ce que l’on connait de nous et ce que l’on a à apprendre des autres quitte à se perdre pour mieux avancer avec passion, sans étiquettes et compromis. C’est ça la beauté et la vraie modernité, le cool. Il est donc bon de pouvoir partir en vacances seul sans s’obliger de (se) prouver que c’est chouette alors qu’il est juste bien pénible de pas pouvoir partager sa passion IRL, relax avec des amis croisés sur la route ou plus si affinités comme tu le présente si justement. On vit bien heureusement une époque géniale où l’on peut s’habiller comme on veut, voir ce que l’on veut et dire que que l’on veut. Autant la partager… et lire plus souvent Garance Doré (quelle rime de m…). Bref, tu m’auras compris. Smack!
Je crois que je suis dans le cas contraire – en fait je vis en ville dans le centre de Madrid – car je me suis toujours dis que ma vie sociale en pâtirait de m’en aller en banlieue..Mais si je regarde objectivement comment se déroule mon quotidien – je ne sors quasiment pas, je ne vois mes amis qu’une fois toutes les deux semaines, et encore…en réalité je gère très bien ma vie dans la “solitude” entourée de mon compagnon et de ma fille. Effectivement je suis souvent partie seule en voyage à l’autre bout du monde, je voyage encore souvent seule pou le travail et j’ai des souvenirs atroces de vacances en groupes. L’esprit “clan” et les tribus me font littéralement paniquer – tout de suite j’ai l’impression de manquer d’air et d’étouffer. Et aussi loin que je m’en souvienne il doit s’agir d’une dynamique familiale car chacun dans la mienne vaque à ses occupations et ne se “retrouve” ensembles que pour des relations de qualité… Pourtant malgré tout je ne me considère pas comme quelqu’un d’asocial…Simplement au delà de 4-5 heures de vie sociale, je me sens vidée, fatiguée et j’ai vraiment besoin de me retrouver….Ce qui ne m’empêche pas de beaucoup apprécier ces moments avec les amis, etc…
It’s the best piece you’ve ever written Garance!
Really got me by heart. One hundred percent there: traveling solo sucks, passion for fashion is actually a MERE passion for fashion. Congrats Garance for putting those stuff out loud :)
Est ce que c’est toi qui venait m acheter des fripes dans ma boutique”bop city” à Aix-en-Provence il y a une quinzaine d’années? il me semble te reconnaître mais peut être que je me trompe. .. en tout cas bravo pour ton blog,que je suis un peu et depuis peu.
I think that with traveling alone you have to give it time. Because most of us live in a city and are used to people being a phone call away, we don’t allow ourselves the time to just be still and alone with our thoughts. It can be scary to hear your every thought, some new that you didn’t even knew you had. But it can also be the most rewording time in a spiritual sense.
As far as fashion goes I love clothes but not the fashion. I like seeing personal style not the copycats.
Well, I loved reading this. I’m 23 and exactly two years ago my life was incredibly shaken so I no longer make affirmations about who I’m or who I’m not a part from the ones I deeply know, cause since that day all I could think about was I know nothing. The things I used to be sure about volatilized and suddenly I understood things I thought I would understand when being and old granny or would never understand. Before that, I used to be a self-labelling person who assured to everyone she loved solitude, too. Well. After being ALONE for months while navigating the depression it follows a trauma, I now can say “Yes, I love it”. I hated it at the beginning but once you reach your lower point and come back by yourself, all alone… well, that day you know the only person in the world you really need is yourself. Not in a selfish kind of way. But in the good way. I now know that being ok with yourself alone is the best way to be ok with the world. One year and a half after I went to meditate for ten days by myself and I discovered I could probably live that way. I was incredibly bothered to be in the city again. Me, the city girl. So, yeah, I like solitude.
Absolutely! I believe that I am an introvert and need time to re-charge and have been on solo holidays, embraced at first but fast to change plans to connect with friends and be social and know that I have had a far better holiday than if I had of remained stubborn solo! Great post. Really resonated. These ideas of ourselves may have been true once and they have created the people we become but do not define us.
Everyone should write a version of this about themselves. It inspires honesty, reflection, and a maturity it takes to know oneself, truly deep, right down under what we think we might like to be. I LOVE this.
Ca fait toujours autant plaisir de te lire 1 Et comme le commentaire plus haut, je reconnais d’anciennes illustrations, que j’aime, et qui me donne envie d’en voir encore plus, plus souvent !
Everything is beautifully said Garance. I share your thoughts on city dwelling as a I recently made a move from NY. I also share your thoughts on fashion; I love beautiful clothing and finding something that feels perfectly suited for myself. However, I hate the circus that revolves around fashion. To me, it is about what resonates with you in getting dressed, it’s very simple.
Thanks for sharing!
Sarah
http://sarahruthwalters.com/
I just love your authenticity!
(To me that’s the core reason why you’ve got so successful from a simple blog…)
Love from Iran :)
Je rebondis juste sur l’une de tes réflexions sur tes Repetto. Justement, moi, quand je vois les blogueuses mode qui changent de fringues, chaussures, lunettes de soleil, sacs, ……. tous les jours pour nous poster une photo sur instagram, je me pose des questions sur leur compte en banque (ok, on leur a pratiquement tout offert) et sur leur dressing. Mine de rien, ça prend de la place tout ça. Mais du coup, est-ce qu’elles aiment ce qu’elles portent ? Je sais que moi, par exemple, lorsque j’achète une paire de chaussures, j’en suis littéralement dingue. Tellement dingue que je veux les porter tous les jours sans exception, et la tenue que je porte devra s’accorder avec les pompes, pas l’inverse. Bon je change quand même de temps en temps hein… jusqu’à l’achat d’une nouvelle paire ! Donc moi, je dis oui pour plusieurs photos insta de tes Repetto !
Hi Garance! I’m a long time reader and a first time commenter, but I felt compelled to write because I really identified with this post, especially statements 2 and 3! I live in SF but find I’m not really into city life, probably because I was born and raised in Hawaii. And I totally agree with you about loving style and fashion but not really being a fashion person. I think that concept of organic and personal style is what drew me to your blog when it was still mostly street shots. But I like how the blog has evolved and I still love hearing your thoughts about life! Thank you for always writing from the heart!
Garance, I always appreciate your reflections and this one has stayed with me since you originally posted it in a way like no other. It’s truly made me re-evaluate the way I think about myself (in a good way) in a time of major life transition. Thank you!
La solitude en voyage ne me dérange pas plus que ça, bien au contraire.Je reviens d’un voyage seule de 7 mois 1/2 en Australie et 2 semaines à Bali ou j’ai fais énormément de rencontres sans même le vouloir.
En logent dans des Auberges de jeunesses en Australie et chez l’habitant à Bali il est TRES facile de faire des rencontres, peut être plus qu’en hôtel. En auberge il suffit de demander du beurre pour ses pâtes, la conversation est engagé et hop on mange ensemble et le lendemain on visite la ville avec les backpackers de sa chambre.
Et je pense qu’en étant seule en voyage notre esprit est plus ouvert aux rencontres qu’avec des amis dont on connait déjà la vie et qui ne nous apprendrons pas de nouvelles choses sur le monde.
Cependant il est vrai qu’en partant seule il y a des moments de solitude et un manque de partage ou souvenirs avec ses proches au retour de voyage, on explique ce qu’on a vu mais aucun ne comprend vraiment la beauté et la génialitude de ce qu’on a vécu.
Bonjour et merci pour ce partage !
Acheteuse compulsive, j’imaginais que les vêtements faisaient mon bonheur … jusqu’à ce que je réalise qu’ils m’empêchaient de vivre. Ils s’empilaient dans mon bac a linge sale comme si cette place leur été dédiée car … il n’y en avait plus nulle part et je passais du temps a les ranger ect … Mais non seulement je ne les respectais pas, je ne voyais plus mes vêtements préférés et leur présence était devenue un poison. Il m’a fallu un déclic … être licenciée ect …pour me reconnecter à mes besoins. Faire le tri parmi d’autres actions à été libérateur ! j’ai jeté presque 70% de ma garde de robe ou j’ai pu me faire un peu d’argent avec. Tout benef’ ! Je chéri mes vêtements et comprend maintenant ce qui me correspond… car oui j’imaginais que rien n’allait sur moi et j’étais souvent a la recherche de mieux ! J’ai compris qu’au delas de ca … porter ces vêtement n’est pas ce qui me plais le plus, c’est faire de la veille graphique.
Pour ce qui est de la solitude, elle peut être bénéfique mais aujourd’hui indépendante je recherche le contact, le travail collaboratif. C’est pesant pour l’instant mais essaye d’en faire une force pour trouver le meilleur moyen d’y arriver et de trouver les bonnes personnes. Etre sa meilleure amie est déjà un point de départ !
Merci
Ps : J’ai aussi fait le tri dans mes livres. “LoveXStyleXLife” est l’un des livres, pour ne pas dire le livre qui a le plus raisonné en moi. Juste .. Merci !
Bonjour Garance! Je te lis depuis bien des années, et je ne commente que très peu. Je tique juste un peu sur ce que tu dis sur le fait de voyager seule : je me revendique comme aimant voyager seule, non pas pour être seule avec moi-même 24/7 mais justement pour les opportunités que ça crée! pour moi, voyager seule C’EST être avec des gens que tu ne connaissais pas auparavant 3 jours après être arrivée à Bali.
bonne journée à toi
Lisa