10 years ago by

Ok, guys. For this post, you’re either going to have to arm yourselves with a big sense of humor, or you might want to pass on this one and come back a little later, you know — like, not right away.

Because today I want to talk about a subject that only women can really really understand. Yeah, you see what I mean. No, I don’t want to talk about stiletto heels or layering. Yes, I think it’s ok to talk about anything and everything. Even when the words used to describe those things aren’t necessarily so pretty.

Today, I want to talk about PMS. Pre-Menstrual Syndrome.

So let’s see…

The other day, feeling like a victim to my hormones, I was trying to get on with my life, ignoring my jeans cutting into my waist because of the bloating, my skin blossoming like a teenager’s (and in case you hadn’t noticed, I’m far from being a teenager) (thank god!), the kink in my lower back, and the tears in my eyes every time I exchanged even two words with anything even resembling a human being (during PMS, an affectionate dog can make me cry) (a Moschino show can make me cry) (a like on Instagram can make me cry), and I said to myself:

“God, if I had PMS all the time, my life would be a total disaster.”

I don’t know about you, but ever since junior high, it’s like some kind of emotional monster takes over my body for at least three days and not only do my moods become a roller coaster — on top of it all, I hurt pretty much everywhere. It’s a choice between any of the following:

One time it will be headaches. Another time I’ll be puffy and bloated all over. Or my back will get jammed up. Or I’ll feel totally fine, but I’ll have an enormous pimple right between my eyes. Or sometimes, I’ll just have flat, oily hair — and when that happens, I sort of feel lucky : not that bad!

And then sometimes it’s the sampler: everything at once.

The worst part is — since I’m totally disorganized, I never know exactly when PMS is going to strike.

I mean, after all this time, I could just add it to my calendar, right? Set those days aside for writing (that’s actually the good part of all this — I’m crazier when I have PMS, so I’m funnier, or at least more sensitive, and that works pretty well for writing — craziness and emotion) or set them aside for illustration (that’s the best — me, my computer, my music…frankly, you can all @&$* off, there’s nothing more PMS-friendly), or set them aside for just lounging around in bed watching four seasons of How I Met Your Mother, which is actually all I really feel like doing on those days anyway.

Of course, I don’t like talking about this. Talking about it leaves the door wide open for all kinds of sexist crap and stupid jokes like “weeeeelll, little lady (when I hear little lady = help, I might kill somebody), someone’s got her period?” (Shut up, asshole) just because I said one word a little louder than usual.

But anyway, if I were organized, here are the things that I would definitely not plan during PMS time:

A discussion with my man. Typical. Me: yelling for no reason, Him: looking at me stunned, Me: coming back to Calm mode, begging him to forgive me, throwing my hands in the air, acting like it’s the end of the world — when all we were trying to do was plan our next vacation.
Him: Hang on a second, what day of the month is it, exactly?

Any kind of public appearance. See earlier paragraph — none of my clothes fit, shiny skin (and that’s if I’m lucky, otherwise it’s the Eiffel Tower on my forehead) and tears in my eyes at the slightest compliment.

A photoshoot. OMG, a photoshoot with PMS = hell. Backache + heavy camera = whoa. All of that only to find yourself in front of a gorgeous model = self esteem in the gutter.

A signing at Colette for the launch of my stationery line. Because it just may happen that, overcome by emotion from meeting my readers and feeling so much love, I start almost crying in their arms (she knows who she is ;).

A bikini wax (is it just me, or does it hurt WAY more on those days?)

Traveling by plane (risk of arriving at your destination looking like an inflatable mattress from all the bloating and swelling)

Watching 12 Years A Slave on the plane mentioned above (between PMS and the altitude, which apparently lends itself to emotional release, one may or may not find oneself crying hot tears and sniffling for 1 hour and 35 minutes).

Buying enough supplies of Figolu cookies (not sold in the US), Granola cookies (not sold in the US) and Balisto chocolate bars (not sold in the US) to last two months only to find that you’ve eaten it all by the end of the aforementioned flight, due to general PMS craziness. Add that to the hot tears and the bloating. What? You think I’m talking about my own experience? Pfff, nonsense.

The worst part is that if you ask anyone who is around me on those days, they didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary (other than the people who know me really, really, really well — they could tell in three seconds). So actually, after all these years, I think I can actually say I’m able to manage it pretty well.

The monthly menstrual vortex.

Because, yeah. Being in PMS mode is kind of like facing a dragon. All day long. And you have to make it look like you’re not struggling. And try to handle everything super well in spite of it all. Or most of the time, just manage to get by.

So you know what ? The rest of the time, life is a walk in the park.

Translated by Andrea Perdue


Add yours
  • Hulk croisé avec un chien battu, c’est à peu près à ça que je ressemble. Intérieurement. Extérieurement, je dirais plutôt, voyons, un mix entre ado ingrate et mègère Prisunic. Donc oui, globalement, je me sens au top de moi-même, et le premier qui dit “ça va pas la peine d’en faire un fromage”, je l’émascule à la petite cuillère.

  • we women have several facets: it’s ok, each is different and neither is all good or all bad. i have learned to live w/ my pms and i often plan around it. it can be done! :)

  • Idem pour moi… Sauf que ça se voit je pense! Héhé.

    Il y a une erreur dans ton article. Tu as écrit PMS partout alors qu’on parle de SPM!

    Merci Garance de nous rassurer! C’est si agréable de lire qu’on est pas seule à vivre ce genre de chose.

  • C’est parce que PMS, c’est l’acronyme en anglais! Pas dramatique, donc… ;)

  • 100% d’accord avec toi ma chère Garance… Oui gonflage, oui tournage de maquillage, oui sensibilité à fleur de peau (et de seins aussi, aie aie aie…), oui boutons (encore à 42 ans, c’est la double peine, acné ET rides !), oui emmerdement total.
    MAIS j’ai une jolie solution pour atténuer tout ça et limiter dans le temps tous ces SPM pas sympas du tout : faire des bébés (déjà avec un ça marche) ! Try it & tell me ;-)) !!

  • Mon dieu que ce que tu dis est vrai. On est toute comme ça.
    Il paraît que certaines n’ont rien pendant cette période mais j’y crois pas. On est mal, y a pas à dire. C’est une période ultra pénible et crevante parce que mine de rien c’est crevant d’être comme ça, d’avoir mal, de perdre “hum hum”. Mais bon que veux-tu “ma pauvre dame”, faut bien vivre avec.
    Bises Garance !

  • Tu n’y crois peut être pas, mais moi personellement, j’ai rien.

    Peut être, comme dit Clotilde, je ressentirait ça à la pré-ménopause… on verra bien.

  • C’est un mystère pour moi, car franchement à 41 ans, je n’ai rien de tout ça comme Lazy, je vais peut-être le payer cher à la ménopause

  • Et ben vous avez trop de la chance les filles ! RDV ici au moment de la ménopause :P

  • Ah je me sens moins seule, moi non plus je n’ai rien de tout ça ! Je suis peut-être juste un peu plus fatiguée le soir en me couchant mais basta.
    Du coup c’est encore pus énervant d’entendre les commentaires sexistes : “Qu’est-ce qu’il t’arrive, tu as tes règles ?” Non non, je suis juste chiante tout le mois… ;)

  • La merveilleuse Lisa Eldridge a shooté cette merveilleuse vidéo sur le sujet :

    Garance, merci pour ton blog.
    Je travaillais le jour où ta ligne d’écriture a été lancée, j’aurais adoré te serrer la main et te dire combien ton blog est une source d’inspiration !
    Merci quoi.

  • thanks for sharing Dani….just looked at video….it is great !

    moon face indeed….will start big time contouring now

  • I second the recommendation of this video – it’s so sensible and good!

  • This post is very nice and the things you say very true!
    Passa a trovarmi VeryFP

  • Ahhh “Time of the month” comme le disent les anglo-saxons! Prise de poids, nerfs à fleur de peau, boulimie, sans parler du mal de ventre horrible etc., etc. Heureusement cela s’est un peu atténué avec le temps, c’est devenu plus périodique depuis que j’ai arrêté la pilule, mais c’est une vraie plaie.
    J’ai entendu dire que le PMS était pris en compte dans les histoires de crimes passionnels, tu nous tue pas Scott parce qu’il n’a pas remplacé le rouleau de papier toilette hein ;) Pauvres hommes!
    Un jour j’ai vu un film où le mec vit dans la peau d’une nana pour un jour et lorsqu’il a ses règles il est 10 fois pire que nous c’était à mourir de rire!

  • Je veux voir ce film!!! J’adore l’idée!

  • Natalie March, 12 2014, 7:45

    Yes, of course I still have those few awful days too, but when I was on the pill it was like perpetual PMSx10. Needless to say, I got right off that.
    PS Garance, I’m pretty sure I cried/sniffled for an entire 1h35m at that one too, and I wasn’t even PMSing!

  • How I understand you ! HILLARIOUS POST

    In my office I had 4 employes….3 girls, 1 boy….

    poor boy….there was always someone PMS ing …it got so bad with one of the girls that we litterally had to put her alone in another room because she would foam at the mouth , become crazy and mean and attack everyone and then cry and cry .We would say ” UH OH ! She is PSM ing aux secours !!!!! sortez la muserolle !

    the boy came out in our office and blamed us for “making ” him gay and then after a while we all started having our periods together and it was just horrible, a real murder fest with huge boxes of Oreos on top.

    You are not alone believe me…….everything to describe above applies to all the girls I know . There is something that REALLY helps even out the suicidal/killer mood swings and that is a supplement called 5HTP……we litteraly have IVs of it in the office…all month long….it changed our lives.
    try it asap ! 5HTP is used to regulate serotonin levels in brain and central nervous system.

    oh and all the girls I know have separate wardrobes for fat PMS days and skinny days.

  • Annaliese March, 12 2014, 9:30 / Reply

    I hear ya sista! I have an arsenal from my acupuncturist and naturopath so I am ready for anything. I try to keep a calendar but sometimes end up observing my emotions or symptoms and popping into my aforementioned remedy cabinet for relief.
    Love your candor and your honesty, you’re like a breathe of fresh air I can look forward to everyday ;)

  • This is hilarious. Reading this when I looked down at my spoonful of chocolate ice cream…and realized what day it was today. Putting away the spoon now…

  • j’étais justement en recherche de médecine douce genre homéopathie pour calmer tout ça, parce-qu’avec le temps, c’est devenu de plus en plus douloureux! des idées???

  • Ama Blue March, 12 2014, 5:12

    Fonce ! ça a changé ma vie (celle de mon fiancé, aussi). Impossible de te conseiller quoi que ce soit de précis. C’est ma gynéco qui s’est chargée d’un bilan personnalisé. Attendre un rendez-vous en vaut la peine !

  • Manger du cru! Que des légumes/fruits crus. Il parait que ça aide beaucoup.
    Il faudrait que je m’y mette sérieusement.
    Et sinon, go pour l’homéopathie aussi, je dois me motiver à prendre un rdv.

  • Highly recommend getting the P Tracker app for your iPhone ( It really helps me manage things since I too become a different person under the power of the hormones (“riding the dragon” as my husband calls it).

  • I have a definition for it : Chucky
    remember those films ?

  • Caroline March, 12 2014, 9:57 / Reply

    I love the plane part… But what happens on planes stays on planes, right? (for example, I tend to cry a lot on planes… is there any scientific info on altitudes and emotions?…)
    As for the list of syndroms, yep, same here.

  • Caroline March, 12 2014, 10:04 / Reply

    I love the plane part… But what happens on planes stays on planes, right? (for example, I tend to cry a lot on planes… is there any scientific info on altitudes and emotions?…)
    As for the list of syndroms, yep, same here. Crazy mood swings, dark thoughts and body swelling out of proportions.

  • Clotilde March, 12 2014, 10:06 / Reply

    Zut, j’avais tout écrit, et j’ai fait une fausse manip, je recommence.

    “Bordel, si j’étais tout le temps en mode SPM, ma vie serait un désastre.”

    Malheureusement, ça peut arriver. Je n’ai jamais eu de PMS/SPM pendant toutes mes “jeunes” années, mais j’ai récemment expérimenté le PMS perpétuel, celui des femmes en pré-ménopause, ou des femmes plus jeunes qui pour une raison ou une autre fabriquent trop d’oestrogènes et pas assez de progestérone. ça peut être dû à l’âge, mais aussi au stress (car les hormones sécrétées lors du stress sont fabriquées à partir de la progestérone), ou encore à la pollution par des substances mimant les oestrogènes ou perturbateurs des récepteurs, dans l’alimentation notamment.

    Et là je confirme, c’est tous les jours et la vie devient un désastre, épuisement perpétuel, prise de poids subite et énorme (la fameuse rétention d’eau est loin d’être un mythe, je l’ai malheureusement découvert), problèmes de circulation, irritabilité constante, angoisses pour des broutilles, déprimes etc…
    On ne se reconnait plus, on se dit “je ne suis pas comme ça normalement, que m’arrive-t-il?”. Et là, l’entourage s’en rend tout à fait compte, et ce n’est top pour personne.

    Jusqu’au jour où tu rencontres un professionnel de santé compétent qui comprend et qui ne te dit pas “vous vieillissez, tout le monde en passe par là”, et qui te donne de la progestérone. Et là le miracle se produit, tout rentre dans l’ordre. La dominance oestrogénique est assez bien connue aux US. Mais ici en France la grande majorité des gynécos s’en fiche éperdument. Pourtant elle touche aussi les jeunes.
    Dernière chose, je ne suis pas d’accord lorsque tu invites les garçons à passer leur chemin, il n’y a pas de raison qu’ils ne sachent pas ce que certaines d’entre nous endurent, ça fait partie de notre vie. Le mien est devenu très compréhensif (et pour cause) et s’assure même que je prends bien mes cachets, des fois que Mrs Hyde revienne lui pourrir la vie! :D

  • Not to be grim, but menopause is like everything you described but ALL THE TIME. Perhaps it’s an evolutionary conspiracy to make you feel relieved when it all finally goes away.

  • This is the FUNNIEST thing I’ve read all week…because ALL OF IT IS TRUE!!! :)


    Merci pour ce cadeau d’anniversaire!!!

    Ceci dit tu as de la chance dans ton malheur, car une de mes ancienne coloc doit prendre des médoc contre la douleur qui la shoot complètement… autant dire qu’au job c’est zéro productivité.

  • severine March, 12 2014, 10:18 / Reply

    OMG so true !
    La liste des symptomes varie de “à fleur de peau/super sensible/susceptible/pleure pour un rien”, mal au ventre ou un peu plus haut, boutons, envie de nettoyer ma maison, ma voiture, mon bureau, mon sac..(j’appelle ça le syndrome de la nidification, genre ton corps te dit de faire ton nid même si en vrai il sait que y’aura pas d’oisillon à venir). Mon dernier mec avait plus ou moins intégré l’idée et donc comprenait mieux certaines crises survenues au milieu de nulle part. En tout cas, moi je suis réglée comme du papier à musique grâce à la pilule, et je note sur mon agenda toutes les périodes “à risque”, pour éviter les situations trop stressantes ou physiques ces jours là (un dîner avec belle maman, oh pourquoi pas la semaine d’après sinon ?)

  • Ahahaha Garance oh lala j’ai envie de pleurer quand je lis ton post, tellement je me reconnais genre là à cette seconde précise!
    Hier j’ai du pleurer 4 fois pour “rien” (bon je suis expat et je me sens sans amis c’est encore pire en mode PMS) aujourd’hui n’en parlons pas! Une fille me dit attends je suis pressée alors que je lui parle je voulais lui faire manger son portable!

    Donc oui c’est dur de gérer et j’espère que je penserais à le noter la prochaine fois comme ça je serais préparer mentalement car c’est toujours la surprise, genre “ah ben oui je comprends pourquoi j’étais pas normale ces jours ci”

    Merci! (je pleure, bon de reconnaissance hein :) )

  • Thank you for talking about this! I just starting reading a book called Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom by Christiane Northrup M.D. (the updated one) and it deals with THIS specifically. She talks about what to do practically and how to make it better. You’re not stuck with PMS. I used to have really bad cramps and mood swings to the point where I didn’t even want to leave the house (TMI- I know) Taking extra iron around that time of month, or black licorice (the real stuff yummy!) or blackstrap molasses even helps (molasses cookies- hello). Adding iron and magnesium made a huge difference. I have hardly any symptoms and a very light flo (omg tmi I KNOW) I love that you are so open about this.

  • Francesca March, 12 2014, 10:28 / Reply

    Completely true. I consistently suffer from the uncontrollable weepies, the back pain. the sweet/salty cravings. It’s maddening! But my mother always chimes in and says you will miss it when it is gone.

  • very interesting article, Garance. So agree…

  • Florence March, 12 2014, 10:30 / Reply

    Oui grosse fatigue, grosse envie de sucre, irresistible attraction vers le bas et vers n’importe quoi de douillet (fauteuil, canapé, couette…). Et oui se faire épiler ces jours là c’est plus douloureux. ( Mon esthéticienne d’ailleurs refuse d’épiler ses clientes ce jour là…elle dit qu’on ne vient pas chez elle pour souffrir)

  • How funny that there’s a post on the same subject on TMR today too … because yeah, it’s THAT TIME OF THE MONTH. (Have all the fashion women in the world synchronised during fashion month or something?!)

    I have a theory that the myth of werewolves was invented to warn men about women at the peak of the monthly cycle. Because I turn into a monster. Interestingly, I never got PMS at all before my daughter was born – now I get the works. Sugar cravings, seesaw-ing between bawling my eyes out and screaming vitriol at inanimate objects (because I swear they DELIBERATELY seek to ruin my life during my period), a face that resembles a double pepperoni pizza, boa constrictor in my belly, ankles so puffy I can barely buckle a Mary Jane onto my foot … Also, I eat men alive.

    And as for your question re bikini waxes Garance, no, it’s not just you. I read somewhere that the body is less able to cope with that kind of pain while you’re menstruating. Top marks for that bit of intelligent design, Mother Nature. You’re a pal.

  • I had always suffered pms but after my son was born it was seriously psychotic. I had another baby 8 years later and feels like I’ve had a system reset. I no longer get crazy, just a day where I can’t seem to control my appetite and then I know it’s coming.

  • OMG I have the PMS pimple between my eyes RIGHT THIS MINUTE.
    And obviously I was too emotional to leave it alone so I made it worse!
    I feel you sister.

  • Ce qui marche bien et m’a été prescrit depuis longtemps par un homéopathe, c’est la vitamine E dosée à 200 mg comme Dermorelle 200 mg, à prendre à raison d’une gélule le matin en seconde partie de cycle, vraiment efficace en particulier sur les fringales.
    Bon courage à toutes ! :-)

  • Tellement vrai! Moi c’est pas tant le physique qui me “gonfle” (ouh le mauvais jeu de mot) que le moral: c’est impressionnant de tomber dans des affres d’angoisse à ce point et perdre pied (encore plus que d’habitude): j’ai appris à ne plus faire de projet dans ces moments là, car tout est vu à la catastrophe…et oui je vois aussi dans les yeux de mon mari dans ces périodes là, le calcul qu’il fait dans sa tête, sans broncher…

  • Oh this bloody PMS! You talk right out of my heart Garance! Why on earth can we not put the days with a thick red marker in our diary?! I have this idea since years and never do it….. it would actually help…. being aware of it can change things a bit…. but I found only one thing that really helps, it’s the Chinese herbs and Acupuncture I do since a while. The PMS monster is not totally gone, but it’s much better, really Garance, try it! You have to find a really good Chinese doctor, which shouldn’t be problem in New York… and he or she can help better than anyone else! xxx

  • Sunny Side March, 12 2014, 10:38 / Reply

    J’adore ce dessin special “menstrue” ! C’est bien aussi de rencontrer ses humeurs dragons si l’on a pas des douleurs intolérables comme certaines semblent vivre.

  • Best post ever! Fuck mother nature sometimes :)

  • You should use Clue! It’s an app that my friend introduced me to that tracks your menstrual cycle including PMS symptoms. So at least you know it’s coming. I’ve been using it for a few months and I really like. Also pretty well designed.

  • Putain ! Granola pas vendus aux US ! Courage !
    (le reste, j’ai pas compris…)

  • L’épilation intégrale ces jours-là ??? Naaaaaaan !!!! (Et pas seulement parce que ça fait plus mal^^). Sinon tout à fait d’accord, on devrait obtenir des congés SPM pour cause de besoin de cocooning. Women power !

  • Charlotte March, 12 2014, 10:55 / Reply

    I used to have severe stomachache. One time, my stomach hurt so bad that I had diarrhea! It’s only on the first day of my period, luckily. Ever since that happened I started taking magnesium citrat and now the stomachache is GONE. I also don’t break out anymore (I also eat a lot healthier + improved my skin care regimen) and there’s no back pain either (also doing more yoga). Luckily, I never got super emotional or something like that, I only had physical pain ;)
    So I highly recommend a healthy lifestyle including magnesium citrat as a supplement!!!

  • Hahaha! I see myself in every single word!
    A tip: try everyday a pill of Evening Primrose Oil (it’s a natural product) and you will note diferences in 1 month!

  • leonor…..good one …… I take 4 primrose oil x 2 times a day for a total of 8 a day ! and I think it helps.

    I also take every day SHATAVARI, which is an ayurvedic remedy for women…perfect for PMS , pre menopause and menopause also :
    “Shatavari supports reproductive health by toning and nourishing the female reproductive organs
    Shatavari maintains healthy hormonal balance
    Shatavari treats PMS symptoms by relieving pain and controlling blood loss during menstruation.
    Shatavari supports normal production of breast milk for nursing mothers
    Shatavari relieves menopausal symptoms such as hot flashes. By producing estrogens it makes up for low estrogen levels in women who are menopausal or have had hysterectomies or oophorectomies
    Used in India as a best-known and most often-used herb for women
    Shatavari supports normal function of the immune and digestive system
    Shatavari also increases libido ”

    and DONG QUAI…” is also known as Chinese Angelica and is primarily known for it’s uses in treating women’s problems including lack of sexual desire, the symptoms of menopause, cramps and PMS. It aids in increasing the effects of hormones in both men and women and is widely used as an aphrodisiac. Dong Quai is particularly useful in helping to end hot flashes and menstrual cramps. It is also used as a liver tonic and in treating sciatica and shingles. It is one of the most widely consumed herbs in China, used as frequently as ginseng and licorice. ”

  • Garance, I could literally read your posts all day, every day. To make your life a teeny, tiny bit easier, perhaps you might want to look into one of the apps that tracks your cycle (if it is regular), like Pink Pad ( or another one (there are many!!). It turns your menstrual cycle into a treasure trove of data (this is the 21st Century after all – big data is the future!), and you won’t be left wondering when and why you are feeling so PMS-y. It makes it all a bit (a very, very, very small bit) more interesting and fun. But it’s still the worst thing in the world, of course. But I’d still rather be a girl than a boy, at least for the make-up!!! xxx

  • three words to fix it: Evening Primrose Oil.
    take one a day and you will be fine.

    p.s. i was the one in the red jacket (a Zara tip from this site btw) on the street near Colette that stared at you and could only manage a moronic ‘hi’ when you passed. sorry for that. I was sooooo nervous.

  • Une fois, en plein SPM, j’ai pleuré (sangloté) devant une pub pour les…..Kiris (sous les yeux horrifiés de mon mec)!

  • hihi!

  • Katerina March, 12 2014, 11:02 / Reply

    wonderful, hilarious, so funny and so so true!!!
    have you tried evening primrose oil (in capsules)? not that it takes everything away, but at least helps a bit.

    there is only one worse thing, at least for me it was, pregnancy.. everything you mentioned times 1000. Can you imagine crying watching Disney movies???

  • Also – drink a lot of water when you start to feel like complete and total you-know-what.

  • For me – I use my PMS as an barometer/indicator of how I might truly be feeling about my life. If there’s something I’m not quite happy with in my life – PMS acts like a big emotional fluorescent highlighter for that discontent. “HEY YOU COULD BE HAPPIER IF YOU RESOLVED THESE ISSUES BY TAKING ACTION”

    When I am happy with my life – I am actually a bit giddy when I’m PMS-ing. I wish those experiences occurred more frequently. I do pay attention to my emotional fluctuations to try to track when PMS is starting…that way I slow down a bit and observe my emotions while I’m having them. Makes PMS less a capricious monster.

  • What you say is very interesting I noticed when I have Pms sometimes I get do depressed about some issues I wouldbt over react about. I even thought I might have depression but it makes sense it makesyou more sensitive to what your dealing with every day! Its good to reglects and not just take pills! ( i read many article suggesting prozac for pmdd which pms depression in a way…)

  • gabrielle March, 12 2014, 11:05 / Reply

    haha j’en pleure de rire (eh oui SPM oblige … émotions perturbées !) tu viens de rendre la semaine qui arrive bien plus belle !!! merci pour tous ces articles je te lis depuis quelques années maintenant ! félicitations pour ton parcours et merci pour ce partage !

  • Mme Richer March, 12 2014, 11:06 / Reply

    I can certainly relate… Adding more fat to your diet (the good kind-avocados, olive oil, grass fed butter, lard from pastured pig, etc ) and cutting back on carbs helped me enormously with the PMS suffering. Look into a high fat-paleo diet, the “bulletproof diet” and so on. That and a menstruation app to schedule the right activities for the right day…

  • Hello Garance

    Il y a un truc qui marche. Je suis pas du genre à baisser les bras devant la fatalité et un de ces jours bénis, j’ai pris le taureau par les cornes. J’ai dit à ma gynéco qu’en 2014, il devait bien exister un moyen de calmer ces symptômes. Il y en a un qu’elle m’a prescrit : la progestérone. J’ai hésité à retomber dans le piège des hormones (vade retro la pilule), mais là, il ne s’agit que de 10 jours par mois, et crois-moi, ça a changé ma vie…
    Mon conseil : ne te laisse pas faire !

  • Clotilde March, 12 2014, 11:34

    Ben voilà, c’est exactement ce que je disais plus haut, il faut dire stop et exiger quelque chose qui fait qu’on se sente mieux, jusqu’à trouver le bon médecin, parce qu’il n’y a pas de raison qu’en 2014, on en reste aux “c’est le lot des femmes ma bonne dame”. Pour moi aussi, la progestérone marche très bien.

  • Ama Blue March, 12 2014, 5:06

    @Mina Oui, très bien, la progestérone. J’ai essayé, et cela a été correct mais, hélas, pendant 2 ans environ :-( Du coup, retour chez la gynécologue, qui, entre-temps, avait fait une formation en homéopathie (hé hé). Depuis, addict à l’homéopathie 1 SPM 0
    Courage à toutes !

  • On Menstrual Seclusion:

    From Red Flower: Rethinking Menstruation by Dena Taylor: Rethinking Menstruation by Dena Taylor:
    Ruby Modesto, a Cahuilla Medicine Woman, says
    the women didn’t feel that they were being imposed upon when they retired to the menstrual hut. They got to be by themselves for three or four days .It was a ceremonial occasion which enabled a woman to get in touch with her own special power. It was a time to Dream and have visions. Each month the women went to their own vision pit. The men had vision pits too, places to Dream and pray.. .This was how the people learned.

    a Yurok Indian woman, relates how she is trying to keep the ways of her grandmother.
    A menstruating woman should isolate herself, because this is the time during which she is at the height of her powers. Thus the time shouldn’t be wasted in mundane tasks and social distractions, nor should one’s concentration be broken by concerns with the opposite sex. Rather, all of one’s energies should he applied in concentrated meditation on the nature of one’s life, “to find out the purpose of your life.”

    In ‘Living in the Lap of the Goddess’ Cynthia Eller writes:
    “Menstruation is described as an opportunity for women to connect to nature, and particularly the moon; to recognize their own divine life-giving powers; to exercise psychic powers that are supposedly heightened during or before menstruation; and to experience death and rebirth on a monthly basis. Spiritual feminists extol menstruation in words like these: ‘Our bodies wax and wane with the moon monthly, continually through the phases of our lives. We contain the ability to conceive, carry, and give birth to life. We are divine!”

    Native American (Lakota):
    “Follow your Grandmother Moon. Her illuminating cycles will transform your spirit.” Begin with the Grandmother Moon at her brightest and most open. This is a time of outward activity and high energy. Sleep where the moonlight touches you. Walk outside where there are no artificial lights. Feel joy and creativity. As the Grandmother begins to cover her face, begin to withdraw into a quieter, less social place. Move to that inward place that is more about “being” than “doing.” In the dark of the moon, when bleeding, the veil between you and the Great Mystery is the thinnest. Be receptive to visions, insights, intuitions. Go to a quiet separate place such as a Moon Lodge. Later, come out of the dark, a woman with a cleansed body. As the moon returns, come back out into the world, carrying your vision.

  • NatalieM March, 12 2014, 11:16 / Reply

    Ohhhh girl. I thought PMS was the worst thing. And then I got pregnant. It’s not at all like this for everyone, but for me, it’s like the worst PMS of my life, except it NEVER STOPS!! Extremely bloated no matter how many gallons of water I drink, crying buckets every time I see a sentimental commercial, and I can’t even try to take a taxi anywhere because of the motion sickness. If there weren’t a baby at the end of this f’d up rainbow, I’d say I long for the simple, fleeting days of PMS.

  • Moi, j’ai une appli pour suivre ça… On peut même ajouter des émoticons pour qualifier notre humeur du jour. Et je peux dire que quelques jours avant le jour J, c’est : déprimée, en larmes, super émotive, etc.
    J’ai même noté que les engueulades avec mon amoureux arrivent souvent (souvent!) à cette période…:-(

    Au moins, je peux voir venir!

  • I’ve started tracking my period with the P Tracker app, but that doesn’t make the PMS symptoms any easier. Or more trackable. Sometimes they start 2 weeks before. Sometimes a week. Some times I wake up with my period and no symptom warning. (The app isn’t 100% accurate, after all.)

    If I don’t have physical symptoms (OH MY GOD, MY BREASTS ARE LITERALLY GOING TO EXPLODE), sometimes it takes me getting irrationally upset about something to realize what’s going on. (Why am I crying because I don’t what to eat for lunch?)

    And it makes me so angry when guys make jokes about it. They have no idea what it’s like to completely lose control over all your emotional capabilities. We don’t LIKE feeling this way! And if guys had PMS, the world would not exist—they’d have nuked each other long ago.

    Oh, and actually, you ARE more sensitive to waxing when you’re getting your period. I went for a laser hair removal appointment during that time and couldn’t understand why it hurt so much more, and my technician told me. So avoid at all costs.

    Anyway, the point is, I’m with you on all of the above.

    Shani x
    She Dreams in Perfect French

  • t’inquiète, cool la vie, pour l’instant c’est rien, vers 45 ans, tu verras, ça devient pire: c’est tout le temps! (cf dit plus haut par certaines). Le pire, ce sont les crises d’angoisse (hyper récurrentes) et les cauchemars; ça, c’est juste l’enfer…

  • I know exactly what you’re talking about here! My pimples always come in between my eye or on my right cheek, and every other month is just so much worse than the other!

    I find I always have some sort of social event to deal with, and like you said, always have to look like I don’t feel like total shit!

  • Je ne dévrai pas être sur cette endroit car je ne suis pas une fille, mias j´adore votre blog et je lis tout ce que vous posted.
    Comme je l’ai lu votre article sur girls talk d´aujourd’hui, j’ai gardé hochant la tête.
    Cela m’arrive aussi. Je me suis dit.
    Mais je me suis rappelé alors que, pas le cas pour moi, parce que j’ai maintenant j´ai changé PMS pour la ménopause.C´ est toujours la même chose, mais encore pire et accompagné de bouffées de chaleur qui ne me laissent pas dormir plus de deux heures consécutives.
    Je pourrai répeter tout ce qu´a dit Clotilde et parfois j´ai l´impression de porter sur moi la malédiction d’Ève dans le jardin d’Eden.
    C’est le prix à payer pour pouvoir engendrer des enfants.
    Avant de vous quitter. Je m’excuse pour mon français, il ya si longtemps que je n’écris pas que j’ai presque oublié.
    Bisous de L´Espagne

  • LOL!!! this made me laugh out loud!!… The things you said are so so true!!!….. lovely post G.x

  • A part une irresistible envie de sucre (enfin de bonbon, des Haribo et rien d’autre) je n’ai pas d’autres symptomes. Alors je m’accorde mon paquet de Haribo que j’engloutis en quelques minutes dans une délectation et un plaisir non dissimulé. Avec les années, j’ai appris à apprécier ce moment entre moi et moi, entre moi et mes bonbecs. A moins que ce soit une excuse que j’ai trouvé pour m’autoriser sans une once de culpabilité ces tonnes de Haribo :-)

  • Sweetheart, didn’t you forget the sleepless nights before the menstruation? You want to sleep because you are very tiered but it won’t work! It’s nice to read dough that I’m definitely not the only one with a lot of ‘PMS-anger’(not that I thought I was the only one). In all the years I gained weight because of those few hormonal horror days. Before those days I’m hungry like horse and now I have to do (more leave) a lot to lose some of that weight. By the way, couldn’t they have chosen a better word for menstruation? Doesn’t sound very positive does it? BUT!!! I always try to think about the one good thing about it…INSPIRATION! And than, when we are all through this hell…there is another coming up…menopause! I think it won’t take very long for me anymore. In my next life I want to be a man, I think, not sure though… Make the best out of it girls, we got the power! What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, pfff…Good luck and a lot of love XXX

  • haha you are so right! Loved to read this. It’s great!

  • Anonymous March, 12 2014, 12:12 / Reply

    And after all of that, you turn 50 and a whole other set of problems appear.

  • En tout cas je t’ai vu chez Colette, et je t’ai trouvé rayonnante dans ta superbe tenue rouge :-)

  • Anonymous March, 12 2014, 12:13 / Reply

    PS: Perfect (and beautiful) illustration to this post!!

  • Stephanie March, 12 2014, 12:17 / Reply

    I love this post Garance! And maybe because I can sympathize so much, but there has to be meaning to it all, even THIS. I like what you said about being able to write better at that time of the month. People (men…ok, boyfriends/husbands) tend to write you off when they find out you have PMS. But does that really mean that our extra emotion is meaningless? Maybe we are actually more clear during that time.
    To add to all the PMS sufferings, I actually kind of lose my memory – like not in a big way, but I forget stuff easily or do stupid things without thinking. I hate it, it feels like I’ve lost my brain. In a positive light, I become more thoughtful and focused on the existential.

  • Ahaha!! Depuis l’arrêt de ma pilule il y a deux ans, je suis gouvernée par mes hormones. Effectivement, entre J-3 et J+1 j’évite toute conversation propice au débat avec mon mec… Et j’attends que ça passe en pensant à la période J6 – J15. Ces dix jours où j’ai la peau hyper douce et ne suis que plaisir ;)

  • Cet article m’a rajeunie ! J’ai passe l’age des PMS/SPM et autres aleas feminins mais je m’en souviens comme si c’etait hier ! Les sautes d’humeur, la tete de travers, les ballonements, l’envie de se lover sous la coquette et de ne plus bouger, la boulimie, etc……Mon mari est un saint qui a su m’accompagner avec patience pendant de longues annees de tourmente.

  • Hello Garance!

    You haven’t seen ANYTHING yet….wait until you hit your forties and start the peri menopausal thing! Trust me, this will blow your mind, because the hormonal mood swings (among a laundry list of things) don’t just go away after your cycle (which changes and can get worse, btw). You start thinking, reflecting on everything, and something called REINVENTION, starts to creep into your being. That’s when you start to question and assess everything about your life, from your place in the universe, to your job, to your man. It’s no wonder so many women make drastic changes (career switches, divorce, taking up extreme sports, have affairs, go on safari, etc.) between the ages of 38 and 47. It’s a time of enlightenment, which is a very good thing, but it is difficult!

    You have been forewarned!

  • Candace, this is freaking me out — I feel like I’ve been in reinvention time for 2 years!!!

  • Panicking as I read this as I turn 38 in a few months! Didn’t know it’d happen this early!

    This post is too hilarious (because it’s true – and they are the funniest, of course), and I sympathize with everyone here! I also agree that pregnancy, post-pregnancy, and weaning of breastfeeding wreak a havoc on emotions and hormones!

    (not to scare anyone from having children or anything)…


    Brigadeiro’s Blog

  • Yes! PMS is bad enough, but there is something that makes hormones even crazier. And that is the first trimester of pregnancy. Oh my poor husband. (Luckily I am now in the second trimester, and the hormones have settled down a bit. A bit.)

  • J’avais complètement oublié ce syndrome car je suis en plein dans la préparation “intense” d’un concours et hier je me suis dit que je devenais boulimique, fallait que je reprenne rdv avec ma diététicienne, puis ce matin je me rends compte que le projet que je prépare depuis 4 mois, non ce n’est pas réalisable, je pleure, j’appelle ma mère, enfin je viens ici te lire et je regarde mon calendrier…tout devient clair. Alors Merci Garance!

  • Haha la même!! Je viens de réaliser que les gâteaux que je m’enfile depuis hier et les larmes aux yeux dans le bus ce matin tout en pensant que j’étais toujours célibataire et “que si ça se trouve je ne rencontrerai jamais l’homme de ma vie” étaient bien dues à ça… A chaque fois j’oublie que je suis en SPM, je me maudis d’être si émotive, je culpabilise et finit par tilter deux jours après que c’était normal puisque SPM. Merci de me l’avoir rappeler pour cette fois-ci ;-) ouf, non je ne tombe pas en dépression!

  • Garance! You must track your period on an app! Mark when you feel changes in weight, emotions, etc., and then in 3 months you’ll start to see a pattern. I take iron pills and do extra exercise the week before my period to reduce symptoms. And I get hormonal 2x a month – about 3-4 days before my period, and then 2 weeks after when I’m ovulating. So I think it’s good to track it. Being open about it has made my boyfriend much more understanding!

  • Awh i so agree with all the above Garance said…its hell…and most of the time you even dont realise until after you ve hissed and yelled at everyone around..ate a kg of cake..n walked around all day staring at blank spaces wondering why life is so shit all of a sudden…

    and the worst part it happnes every 3-4 weeks…so every 3-4 weeks you have just spent coming off that chocolate addiction gained after a few days pmsing…and repeat! grrrrrr :)))

  • Belinda March, 12 2014, 1:08 / Reply

    You think that’s bad . . . .just wait til you hit perimenopause. The joys of being a woman :)

  • You guys are toooooo funny !!! Reading you is making me go back to PMS (I still have about 10 days of freedom so puhleaaaazzz)(I know TMI) !!!

  • Oh, Garance, you always make me smile. Thanks for writing about what can be a maddening time of the month for so many and putting your humorous spin on it!

    As for your illustration, as always it’s beautiful and depicts exactly how I’m feeling today :)

  • Hilarious! And such a perfect timing…

    For some reason it “shocks” me every month again. I act like a tyrant and wonder WTF is wrong with the people around me. It will feel like my blood is boiling a little on the inside. Then the realization hits me… Ehhh….

    Then I just have to laugh, because come on… It is kind of ridiculous and funny when you think about it.

    Loved the post, Garance! It put a smile on this tyrant’s face.

  • Catherine March, 12 2014, 1:20 / Reply

    Exercise can help. Also, the continuous birth control pill can reduce PMS because it allows you to have your period only two or three times a year instead of 12. There is no medical reason to have periods (look for info on the Mayo Clinic site, or WebMD). While estrogen has been linked to higher risk of breast cancer, it also has been linked to lower risk of ovarian and endometrial cancer, as well as to lower heart attack risk and better bone density. (see
    The hormonal (not copper) IUD also tends to suppress menstruation. I had one for five years and didn’t have periods. It was heaven. I did have bad cramps for the first three days or so after insertion (which, considering all the missed PMS, is a bargain). However, I’d had a child, and the IUD can be difficult for women who haven’t yet had children.
    In short, it’s worth talking to your doctor. There’s no reason to suffer.

  • Pas de Granola aux US?!….ça c’est dur!

  • So true Garance, sans parler de la fatigue!!!!

  • Garance! you and Leandra must be syncing or something!!! :)

  • Rien de tel qu’une appli iphone pour essayer de voir venir tout ça… Period Tracker a un peu changé ma vie !

    Allez j’ose…..tu parles pas des pets made in SPM? Sérieux, c’est pas honteux ce qu’on peut sortir pendant ces quelques jours? ha ha ha

  • i have mild symptoms, but thought this ted talk was really interesting:

  • A thousand times, “YES!” to all of this.
    Keeping track doesn’t even necessarily work, since mine can come up to a week early. Last month, my cat nipped at me while I was showering love on him and I burst into heaving sobs because NO ONE LOVES ME!
    My husband had no idea what to say as I bawled and looked at the cat like he was Fredo Corleone betraying the family.
    After an hour even I thought, what the hell was that about?

    One week later, my period arrives, and I realize that my total emotional breakdown was because of early PMS.

  • Haaaaaaaaaa merci d’aborder ce sujet !

    Crier, quitter, partir, (ou même tromper!), … Tout cela intervient dans ces moments là ! Toute contradiction avec soi même, tout besoin de liberté, de s’affirmer, prend toute son ampleur et BOUM !

    Il parait qu’il existe des solutions médicales, mais dans cette exagération se trouve souvent une part de vérité, latente le reste du temps, ou qu’on ne veut pas voir, qui ressurgit de manière incontrôlée, et c’est peut être pas plus mal…

  • Jane with the noisy terrier March, 12 2014, 1:51 / Reply

    Then there’s one of my favorites — boobs so heavy and tender that you fear anyone who comes within 10 yards of them. I’ve been in perimenopause for years now — so now I get night sweats for some months then — surprise! — PMS is back! I sleep better but I’m tired and might take major offense over the least significant (perceived) slight. Oh yes, and the almost constant tears and need for both salty and sweet snacks. The joys of womanhood….

  • laparisienne March, 12 2014, 2:00 / Reply

    Merci Garance pour cet article très déculpabilisant !
    moi aussi j’en souffre beaucoup, outre les prises de poids, s’ajoutent les prises de becs( avec évidemment un moral en berne dans ces cas là ) et la l’effet miroir sur la peau ( on se sent moche à cause des boutons et de la peau qui suinte littéralement!)
    pour la peau, j’ai demandé à mon dermato un truc ” naturel” : du zinc un comprimé matin et soir, çà régule la création de sébum et je ne brille plus comme un lampion
    j’ai essayé les hormones pour réguler les émotions, sans grand succès pour moi
    on me parle beaucoup d’homéopathie , alors on verra bien !

  • Estelle March, 12 2014, 2:24 / Reply

    Love this post!! Thank you Garance! (Please! Please don’t cry!!!)
    Every month when “That Time” comes around it always takes me by surprise. It usually takes a few “irrational” behaviors to remember that Oh yes: “It is that time of the month again”. But by then I’ve already cried a river!!

  • Constant struggle with PMS – have a laugh – laughter helps everything, doesn’t it? – highly recommend the whole episode –
    “The IT Crowd” Aunt Irma Visits

  • Trop cute.
    Mes conseils en bref:
    1- arrête l’épilation intégrale c’est moche
    2- matte le film “9 mois ferme” au lieu des histoires mélos de slaves-truc, c’est à mourir de rire et ça peut te donner des idées qui stoppent les inconvénients de la PMS… pendant 9 mois.
    3- vise avec impatience la carotte des 50 balais, c’est la libération absolue !!!


    ps: je regrette bien de t’avoir ratée chez Colette, ça aurait été plus chargé en émotion que le gorille tatoué qui m’a tendu ma coque d’iphone …

  • Depuis que je suis sur la pillule, je vis ma vie très normalement quand j’ai mes règles. Le fluide est HYPER léger en dirait qu’il y a rien. Aucun mal de ventre sauf les seins qui gonglent et ils sont dures (si seulement ça pouvait rester comme ça à l’année longue ahaha!). J’ai par contre connu ça lorsque j’avais entre 18-22 ans (j’ai 23 ans) c’est qu’à ce moment j’ai eu des gros maux de ventre, les émôtions etc. Ados j’avais pas de SPM lol! Mes amies ne comprenaient pas pcqu’elles m’entendaient jamais me plaindre. :)

  • Quelle horreur, on ne vend pas de Granola aux Etats-Unis???!!
    Super post :)

  • Thinley March, 12 2014, 2:45 / Reply

    Hey, Garance. You should download P.D. It’s a free app that monitors your cycle! Midol is a good period-related aches pill. It won’t get rid of all the crazy things that we have to go through each month, but it definitely helps! Take care.

  • Hahahaha you just made my day! My mom keeps saying she feels sorry for me. Now at least I know there is an end to all this once you hit menopause!!!

  • Jen Wilson March, 12 2014, 2:51 / Reply

    Yes, it’s tough. Wait until hot flashes a la Menopause. It hit me early (age 38) and is still going strong (43) so women have it rough. That’s why I think we’re a lot stronger then men.

  • Toujours aussi drôles et rafraichissant tes articles. Merci !

  • Les mots de tête… Les tremblements internes… Complètement vaseuse toute la journée, à l’ouest… Complètement. Migraine avec larmes qui coulent. Ça, c’est pendant. Trois jours durant. J’ai un utérus retro inverse. Cela induit, en plus, une constipation terrible, des douleurs de ventre que j’appelle “ma préparation à l’accouchement”. Et avec ça, le boulot, les réunions, car comme je ne suis pas cheffe, c’est pas moi qui choisit… L’horreur. Je regarde parfois les femmes politiques, les femmes d’affaires, et de me dire que cela doit être bien difficile de travailler dans ces moments-là. Comment font-elles ? Comment fait-on ? Pourquoi devons-nous subir cela ?

  • Les maux… Désolée…

  • Garance, do you perhaps suffer from Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder? It is a severe form of PMS that sets in several days before the onset of menstruation. I also find I lose all my sense of style during the first few days of my cycle. It’s like having style amnesia…suddenly I cant coordinate anything and my entire wardrobe is rendered useless. I will also impulse buy during this time, I may as well be blindfolded when I go shopping during PMS. And I’ll believe anything the saleswoman feeds me…’You should totally get those metallic PVC track suit pants they look AMAAAZING on you!’

  • Thank you SO much for your honest writing, and the general decision of focusing the blog more around the true stuff. True Stuff :)

    My PMS is different depending on which type of Pill, I am on. Just wanted to share that, after having a real revelation after a switch that cut drastically down on my Dragon Moments (my poor man)! Such a life changer. Honestly.

    Love to you all

  • i said to by boyfriend “So glad i got my period his said I’m so glad i was let down form the cross” lol

  • Must be going around this week, because I just saw Man Repeller has a blog post today on the same topic! I am also eyeballs-deep in my PMS right now, so I know the feeling! I try to survive on lots of tea, ibuprofen, naps, and telling my husband to go find something else to do with himself. He’s pretty understanding about most of it – he even cooked dinner last night because I was a half-asleep pile on the couch when he got home!

    Long live womanhood…the endless struggle to not feel like junk!

  • I love you! I am not alone!!!

  • Cassandre March, 12 2014, 3:42 / Reply

    Garance, tu m’as fait pleurer de rire, c’est tellement “ça” !

    PS : a quand un poste où l’on recense les pires connards que l’on ai rencontré… Ce pourrait être une thérapie pour beaucoup et très drôle je pense (Bon, moi la première je dois le reconnaître !!)

    des Bisous,

  • That is exactly how I feel right now. Me and the pimple on my cheek. And the half eaten double chocolate chip cookie in my hand. Only that I watch “Gilmore Girls” instead of “How I met your Mother”. Starting a new job while PMSing isn’t that great either.

  • So I had a revelation about PMS this year.

    It is actually a blessing.

    (?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!? I know, hear me out.)

    I was reading in some blog or other, that if we women shift our paradigm from thinking of our cycle and PMS as a ‘monster’, to a more gentle, loving way at looking at it… things will shift within us.

    All month long, our ‘Wise Woman’, the one who keeps calm, and dispenses wisdom and is gracious and graceful and etc. is working for us. For at least 23 days. During PMS, is when the ‘Little Girl’ comes out– she is the being who has held in your rage, your grief, your anxiety. Do you notice that month to month, the emotions are different? This year, Little Girl was telling me I had a lot of rage that Wise Woman tries to take care of.

    So now, I try to take it easy on myself during PMS. Try to have compassion for my body. Thank Wise Woman for being so strong all month; thank Little Girl for bearing the brunt of the hurt.

    Try it next month!

  • oh how I hate PMS! grrrr

  • I’m sure I read somewhere about women disappearing off (Red Tent?) to reflect and be generally over-sensitive and not deal with the rest of the world once a month and then emerge slightly more enlightened.. it would be good if we could just allow ourselves to retreat for a few days each month.. seems sensible to me. I try to keep these days free from any heavy duty work meetings etc.. it just makes everything that bit harder.. must remember to take iron.. I always feel generally more lethargic during mine, great post :) and absolutely 2 sizes of skinny jeans are a must!

  • Excellent ce post : amusant comme j’aime !
    Il faudrait une machine à donner des soufflets pour chaque “Ma p’tite Dame” dit dans ce bas Monde.
    Me revient en tête celle du film “P.R.O.F.S”… Je sais, c’était il y a très trèèèès longtemps et ce n’est pas la meilleure image que je pouvais donner… Mais c’est exactement ce à quoi je pense en entendant cette phrase, parfois ! ;)

  • hahah so true! however i am lucky in the fact that i’ve always had irregular periods so i skip a few months at a time. i would hate to think what would happen if i had to experience this every.single.month!

  • Ah, comme je me reconnais là-dedans! Dans ces moments-là, je ne rêve que de mon lit pendant presque une semaine, je ne supporte plus mon corps, j’épuise mon stock de papiers matifiants, je m’énerve contre un couple qui en fait trop dans le PDA, désespère de l’absence de mon super pote parce qu’il est absent 3 jours pour cause de formation…

    PS. J’ai été ravie de te rencontrer chez Colette. J’étais confuse, persuadée de prendre trop de temps, et j’ai oublié de dire merci, merci et encore merci pour tout! Et tu étais sublime! Le joli planning trône désormais sur mon bureau :)

  • Trop drôle! Tu as vraiment le don pour trouver les mots et décrire l’indomptable… Je connais bien le problème, j’ai tout eu en version +10 000 pendant des années! Mais cela a beaucoup changé en faisant régulièrement des cures de magnésium. Il faut aussi changer son alimentation et éviter certains aliments qui nourrissent le monstre SPM, j’ai plus la liste en tête mais on la trouve facilement sur le net, en tout cas, ce qui est sûr c’est PAS DE SUCRE!!!!!!!! L’enfer quoi, je sais. Pour moi, c’est réduit aux envies irrésistibles de dévorer tout ce qui est gras et sucré pendant 2-3 jours et aux gonflements J’ai ma technique : des vêtements chouchous spécial règles (genre jupe élastiquée à la taille avec laquelle je pourrais manger un tank, j’aurais encore l’air et l’impression d’avoir le ventre plat… bonheur suprême dans ces moments-là), j’emmène partout avec moi des fruits (sucre mais pas démoniaque) et je dors aussi plus que d’habitude. Ma thérapeute m’avait dit aussi que ce serait mieux au fil du travail sur moi-même et je dois dire qu’elle avait raison! Apparement, si on est plus équilibrée émotionnellement, les hormones jouent moins au yo-yo et le tout s’améliore… Bref, je sais pas si c’était seulement ca mais c’est mieux!!! Même si en période de grande fatigue quand je suis débordée de travail, j’avoue que c’est chaud de rester zen, l’envie de me cloitrer chez moi, la bouillote fumante et de ne parler à personne refait surface… J’espère juste que le mythe selon lequel la ménopause chez une femme = comme les règles étaient à l’adolescence parce que pas moyen que je me retape cet enfer invivable pendant des années!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Je croise les doigts!

  • Oh la, la Garance… Ai vécu cet enfer pendant longtemps… Et maintenant que je suis ménopausée (depuis bientôt 4 ans et je n’ai que… 43 ans…), je confirme “le mythe” mentionné par Mademoiselle Franz : c’est SPM tous les jours depuis… bientôt 3 ans ! Merci pour ce post. Je lis votre blog tous les jours. Continuez à nous faire rire et rêver ;o)

  • Il parait que le sport aide…

  • I feel ya. BUT.
    I feel cheated.
    It feels like I am the only one who gets IT on totally bizarre days! Please, please, tell me I’m not the only one??!
    I even got an app to keep track, but I get IT out of the blue – wham! – no worning!..
    And the sickest part of it all is that if I have something important coming up, and I am nervous about it I will get it the day before the important even, or even better yet right on the day, because I am so freaking nervous that I trigger my own body into IT. That just sucks. =(

  • each beautician i have been to recommends not having waxing (anywhere on your body) just before or during your period as it does hurt more

  • Benedicte March, 12 2014, 4:54 / Reply

    Bah moi, je n’ai jamais eu de symptômes, ce sont des jours comme les autres ; ni plus ni moins hystéro, émotionnelle, déprimée… Et comme moi aussi je suis hyper désorganisée, je me fais surprendre à chaque fois

  • Ama Blue March, 12 2014, 4:56 / Reply

    Tout est dit !!! Merci de traiter ce sujet sur ton blogue* :-) En fait, je pense même qu’il devrait être fourni aux hommes, un peu comme une notice d’emploi ;-) Je blague, alors que, en fait, .cette période peut être super pénible pour la majorité d’entre nous.
    J’ai quasiment résolu le problème grâce à l’homéopathie. Résultats fantastiques (c’est même ce qui m’a amené à réviser mon jugement sur l’homéopathie) obtenus après un rendez-vous chez une gynéco, et prise du traitement pendant 2 mois avant un effet concluant, mais 2 petits mois, ça en valait la peine.
    En attendant, elle m’avait conseillé de boire beauuuuucoup plus d’eau 1 semaine avant les Jours du Dragon !

    *blogue désormais devenu le seul ‘magazine’ féminin que je lis

  • FYI Au coin de 76 et York (a côté de l’école de mes enfants) au café moulin (ou moulin a café ? J’y vais tous les jours pour le goûter depuis 2 ans… Je ne suis pas folle vous savez…) Ils vendent des granola, du côté d’or et même des chamonix et tout un tas de trucs bons bons. En cas d’urgence quoi.

  • clotilde March, 12 2014, 4:59 / Reply

    Non le sport n’aide pas, je cours beaucoup, des marathons, et même des ultra, et ça ne changeait rien, c’était plutôt dans l’autre sens, j’avais les jambes tellement lourdes et j’étais tellement fatiguée que je ne pouvais presque plus courir. (bon mais ça c’est pour la version “permanente” du PMS, peut-être que c’est bénéfique sur la version mensuelle)

  • I understand you so well! You describe this PMS so well! I’m going to send it to my husband so that he understands better that I’m not the only one going crazy during these days ! :)
    (I’ve already explained him this, but I Think he doesn’t believe me!!)

  • Nathalie March, 12 2014, 5:02 / Reply

    Absolutely LOVED this. Almost made me cry. (And when I say “almost” off course I mean totally, because guess what?)
    Now I’m going to watch the notebook complain to my cats and eat all the chocolate.

  • De l huile de bourrache et d onagre, en comprimés. Ça réduit ce fichu SPM.

  • juliekabuki March, 13 2014, 1:57

    Et puis après on découvre l’homéopathie, l’huile de bourrache et d’onagre et hop … on se dit que rien ne justifie ces jours de mal-être dans la semaine !
    Je vois que je ne suis pas la seule à recommander cela, c’est chouette!
    bises et courage à toutes !

  • Nice insight (my partner straight away said “You need to read this” this morning). Would love to get Scott’s POV for hot tips to help guys to survive & support one’s partner during said timeframe.

  • Omg!!! Just spent the day honking at people, shouting at a stranger ( who couldn’t hear me) in my car at them because they were honking at me, cried at songs on the radio and just bought cookies (lots of them). All because I am pms’ ing. How funny that sat down to read your blog..and boom, there it is..PMS talk.
    Glad to know that I am not alone.
    P.s. I also get a “period face” where I turn yellow and look sunken in..Good times. LOL

  • Amen Garance, best way to describe it :-) LOL big time! Merci!

  • screenplay39 March, 12 2014, 5:30 / Reply

    Garance, you poor wracked creature.
    You must start on a good B-Complex vitamin – 100 mg.
    It will change your life, is also crucial for PMS/cramps, breast health, lustrous hair, good bowels.
    Give it a week, 1 capsule daily, you will thank me!

  • Garance-

    Look into seed cycling… and easy and healthy way to try to control PMS

    Love what you do!

    Amy Serpa

  • Tu devrais voir la tête de mes enfants, 5 ( 4 garçons 1 fille ) quand je suis en plein SPM ( sans le savoir), tout d’un coup je pars en vrille, sans prévenir évidemment, ils (les garçons plus ) me regardent d’un air désolé et me disent:” ça va Maman ?” ” qu’est-ce qui t’arrive?”… et là je comprends que le “démon” est là…

  • Je dois être un robot, car depuis que je prends la pilule, je n’ai plus JAMAIS eu de SPM!
    J’avais presque oublié ces sensations, surtout cette horrible déprime incontrôlable.
    Merci à la médecine moderne !

  • Caroline Mt March, 12 2014, 6:46 / Reply

    Pour le coup je n’ai rien à dire sur le sujet, je n’ai aucun changement de comportement et mes règles sont rapides, hyper espacées donc j’avoue ne même jamais y penser.
    j’ai ma petite appli sur iphone pour me rappeler quand ça va arriver et basta.
    je compatis quand même à toutes celles qui en souffrent parce que ça ne doit pas être drôle du tout de vivre ça chaque mois.

  • catherine March, 12 2014, 7:04 / Reply

    im 21 years old and i can say like Garance i NEVER know when the monster is coming. only now (today to be direct) that i have the proof do i realise and remember those moments in the week before of slight tears when confronted with ‘cash or card’, the clothes that i could wear that were too tight, which in turn created more fear about weight and self esteem, not to mention money problems (which were made up in my mind) and oh so much more!

  • J’ai tout de même un truc semi intelligent à dire sur le post SPM… Lorsque j’étais étudiant en design de bijoux (je t’en ai jamais parlé…) une de mes camarades à fait un collier, dans lequel elle pouvait ranger un tampon quand elle allait en soirée. Lors d’une présentation intermédiaire notre doyen de 60ans marier trois enfants, lui dit: mais c’est inutile ce collier, tu en mets un le matin et c’est bon… Quand elle lui a expliqué le concept post SPM c’était à pleurer.

  • I share your pain! Prepare yourself for menopause (hopefully not so early for you as it is for me). That is like PMS full-time. My poor husband… they are always the ones who really see the side-effects in full frightening guns blazing colour! Best thing they can do is agree with everything… although even that can be super annoying. Ha!

    On the upside, at the end of all of this, there will be no more monstrous version of us (oh how I hope).

  • To be honest I don’t like these kinds of opinions about women and our menstrual cycle. I used to get annoyed at men who were afraid of their girlfriends’ emotional changes during these periods because really, if it happens once a month from the age of 11-14 whatever, then its really just a part of your personality by this point. I do not agree that we cannot control ourselves during this time, and I know that you’re exaggerating for dramatic purposes but it just seems so… I don’t know, junior high.

  • Clotilde March, 13 2014, 12:49

    “Junior high”?
    It’s juste because you were lucky enough and never experienced the true thing. As I said above, I never had it when “young”, and thought it was a myth or a convenient excuse for men to get rid off non-cooperative women. Then it literally blew my life when I hit my mid-forties. When you don’t recognize yourself, when you start to scare yourself, and also scare your kids, husband, colleagues, believe me, you feel this stuff is not overrated. Then you understand it is not a psychological but a chemical problem, that a quite simple treatment can make disappear. Please, never doubt what other women may go through, we are all different.

  • Thank you for writing this honest, funny and TRUE account of what we all tend to suffer… and suffer in silence. I am also thanking you because in the comments I see guidance and support from other strong women. Thanks Cori for the info about the iron and magnesium. I suffer BIGTIME with pain and flo and moodswings and I will try this out.

    Thanks again… brave and beautiful G.

    (Bonus I see a comment from another Amalia in the world. Nice!)

  • I LOVE THIS. Thank you for writing this. I get ridiculous PMS and think more people should talk about it. More women, that is, because when one of the men in my office suggest I have PMS I’m beyond ready to hurt them, whether or not they’re right. The last time I had it I flew from New York to Phoenix. When I went through security the TSA attendant asked me to take my sweater off, then my scarf. I snapped at him in front of everyone and asked if I could at least keep my pants on. I think I’m lucky I wasn’t detained…

  • Today I closed my office door and cried behind my computer bc of pms lol

  • LILYCHAN March, 12 2014, 9:32 / Reply

    Garance, try to avoid anything cold before and during those days!! Drink warm/hot water with 1 teaspoon of brown sugar and ginger. That will definitely help! ummm…sorry, but you can’t really drink coffee when you have period>.<

  • J’ai tellement rit!!!!! Tu expliques le tout TELLEMENT bien!!! Mon Dieu, je pensais que j’étais la seule folle qui commence à pleurer quand son copain lui sert le souper…..quelle horreur, je me sens comme un monstre instable…!!!

    Merci pour cette clarification. Je ne me sens plus seule.

  • Non, non ca n’est pas que toi, surtout pour les balistos :)


  • Yes to everything you mentioned plus: craving cocktails/wine & coffee like crazy!!! sweet + salty + crunchy on top of sweet + salty ice cream after burgers and fries. watching the devil wears prada or anything with great fashion while lying on the sofa. Also, obsessively looking at different hair styles wondering which might look unbelievable on me.

  • Michele March, 12 2014, 9:52 / Reply

    Chinese medicine! It works!

  • OUI ! L’épilation fait plus mal ces jours-là, mon esthéticienne me l’a dit !

  • Dear Garance, reasons are as follows:

    Flat & oily hairs: you ate a lot of heavy, greesy and/or raw food with adequate rest. If you dont have enough sleep and rest, your digesting system not running well. The leftover is your stomach accumulates and its all turns out to have greesy and flat hair and oily face. Remember, its not your shampoo and cleansing products problem but you are eating too much and rest not enough. To solve this problem, either you consult Chinese medicine doctor to drink some herbal medicine (Faster way) or eat light and warm food (easy to digest) and sleep, rest and relax more.

    Bloat and stablize your emotional: BANANA! avoid sweets and chocolate. It may delighted you in short but you will goes to depress afterwards but banana can stablise your blood suger and magnesium in Banana can ease the bloat.

    Roller coaster emotions: Simply because most of your blood goes down to your ovary to get ready to pull out dirt and un-used eggs. Blood in your upper part of your body is comparatively less including the liver which is an organ affect our emotions. Not enough blood in the liver cause of bad emotions and tempers goes bad.

    All in all, everything has the reason. If you know why it happens and affects you, you know the way to solve it. WARM your ovary by drinking and eating hot and cooked food. And please sleep as much as you can during this tragic days. Just go to bed whenever you have bad moods, then it will goes away.

    This is Molly from Hong Kong, a person very far from you but sharing exactly the same experience with you. Wish you good health and thank you for sharing your experience. Apology for my bad english and hope suggestions helps.

  • PMS is really bad for me too. It seems to get worse with age. I actually went on birth control to try to get rid of it, but the BC made me an insomniac. One time it lasted like 2 weeks and I honestly thought I was going to murder someone. And yes, it’s either one or two minor symptoms or like a crazy whirlwind of emotions and awful bloating/pimples.

    I have had men and women both tell me to see this as natural, as part of a natural cycle. There is nothing natural, though, about being derailed emotionally and physically for one week out of four every month. I’m really tired of that argument.

    I think I read that there is one week during your cycle (right after your period) where you feel amazing and can think clearly. So we basically get one great week a month and the rest is PMS build-up or menstruation. Kind of depressing. Really wish we could get some kind of anti-PMS pill.

  • I love you Garance! Thank you for writing about this. You absolutely crack me up. So funny. Since hitting my mid thirties I honestly thought I had some sort of metal disorder for 2 days each month – crying at nothing and everything. Crazy emotional. Bloated…BLOATED – like I now know what it feels like to be 5 months pregnant! ha! My doctor asked me if it was ruining my relationship yet and (I’m single) I said No but the poor guy that has to deal with this every month – he’s gonna run for the hills! How come the medical industry has not come up a magic potion to sort this out? They’d be rolling in it.

  • ;-) It’s not that waxing (or anything else for that matter) hurts more those days, it’s just that our ability to handle any kind of pain, or annoyance, becomes very very very limited;-)

  • Yes yes yes all true!
    For me, every month for 3/4 days, I want to divorce my husband ;)))

  • And by the way, who invented this whole PMS thing anyway? Must be a man….:)

  • PMS

    I’m PMSing, I have a headache and I’m tired of your bullsh*t….Please leave a message after the beep.

    They call it PMS because “Mad Cow Disease” was already taken.

    Welcome to our playground…we have giant mood swings and emotional roller coasters.

  • pour moi 2 efferalgans des les 1ers symptomes et ca passe !!!! essaye

  • Theresa March, 13 2014, 3:11 / Reply

    Best post this year! Thank you all the way from the tip of Africa xxx

  • You had me at bikini wax… If you are going to track your cycle for no other reason on earth, at least track it so you never again get waxed the week of your period (no facials either). I like that you are comfortable writing more of the conversational content you are drawn to. This is so entertaining & relatable! I have a theory that we have two PMS cycles (lucky ladies, right?) one before our periods and the other more fierce one (crazy mood swings, cramping of a different sort and food cravings galore) right before ovulation… Yeah – killer… Thanks late 30s, like I don’t have enough to deal with!

  • Elizaveta March, 13 2014, 3:58 / Reply

    Now imagine pregnancy and postpartum..)

  • Ohlàlà mais on dirait moi !

    Le bide gonflé dans mon jean taille haute (qui d’habitude me va comme un gant), ma peau naze, mes cernes ultra-accentuées (les règles peuvent les augmenter), je pleure en écoutant une pub à la radio et je suis beaucoup plus nerveuse donc mon copain grille direct dans quelle période du mois je me trouve ;)

    Mais y a un truc qui marche pas mal si on le suit bien, et qui réduit assez considérablement le SPM, ce sont les gélules d’onagre ! L’onagre est une huile qui fait beaucoup de bien à la peau et la seule qui peut aussi améliorer l’acné hormonale (le reste, crème ou soin direct sur la peau atténuera les boutons mais ne traitera pas la cause, à savoir les hormones) et qui régule tout ça… Je la prends 15 jours avant mes prochaines règles et je vois la différence ;)

  • 1. Oui pour les homéopatiques. Par exemple: Mastodynon (C’est qui qui invente les noms des médicaments?)
    2. Oui je pleurs chaque samedi qui précède le lundi où mes règles commencent d’habitude. Je l’accepte :))
    3. J’imagine qu’un peu plus de méditation ces jours là m’aiderait à rester ‘claire’ dans ma tête.
    4. Oui, mon bas du dos devient tendu des fois. Je fais des exercices pour le soulager. Mon osthéo m’a proposé de corriger ‘le positionnement’ des organes féminines, il paraît que ça devrait soulager les tensions, mais comme ce serait un geste ostéopatique fait par la voie intravaginale (j’ai googlé et c’est bien un procédé qu’on peut faire), je n’ai pas trouvé le courage. En fait depuis qu’il ait ennoncé cette possiblité, tout va mieux. Miracle :)))
    5. S’abstiner du gluten et des produits lactés m’aide aussi.
    6. Peut-être que c’est psychologique aussi, je sais pas, il paraît par exemple que seulement les femmes qui savent qu’elles sont enceintes ont des maux matinaux. Les femmes qui ne se sont pas du tout rendu compte qu’elles soient enceintes vont bien. Ben voilà, encore une thérapie à suivre… :)))

  • Wait til after 40, Garance. It’s a whole new set of challenges!

  • Dr AGAB March, 13 2014, 4:34 / Reply

    Ben essaie la grossesse ! C’est le festival des hormones, en plus il y en a des nouvelles que tu n’as pas expérimentées en PMS… Ce ne sont plus les montagnes russes, c’est Grand Canyon !
    Et le stade que toute femme vit, contrairement à la maternité : la mé-no-pause. Là tes hormones te quittent : tu déprimes, tu t’énernes, la moustache te pousse…. STOP. Les hormones ce sont des molécules dangereuses. Et je n’aborde même pas les maladies hormono-dépendantes… Avec un peu de chance on y échappe. Mary J Bligde a écrit une super chanson sur le même sujet que toi, qui s’appelle…PMS ! Elle dit la même chose que toi :

    I wanna talk to the ladies tonight
    About situation I’m pretty sure y’all be able to relate to
    Trust me

    Today I’m not feelin pretty
    See I’m feeling quite ugly
    Havin one of this days
    When I cant make up my mind
    So don’t even look at me
    See I don’t wanna hear your problem
    Cause I’m having some of my own
    I know it was not your fault
    That I’m feelin down
    I just wanna be left alone… etc.

  • Don’t be too worried about menopause. It’s different for everyone. I’m 52 and haven’t had a period for about a year. I feel great and haven’t had any symptoms – just no periods; what’s not to love about that? I’m very happy not to have to go through that horrible dragging pain of having a period ever again.

  • ah le plaisir d’être une femme! pourquoi tout ça on ne sait pas, mais moi je me dis souvent que dans une autre vie je devais être odieuse pour souffrir comme ça tous les mois!
    c’est ainsi…

  • Right now I’m struggling day 2 and whoop you write a post about – what is that??
    I feel like a volcano. Yesterday I bought super cool biker boots at zara to lighten my mood. I’m sitting in my office right now and looking at them under my desk. They look very pretty – exactly opposite how I feel. The leather is very hard – I’m thinking that maybe I bought them too small? Just thinking about it literraly makes my want to cry. Seriously. Everyone and everything pieces me off. Even me. How a person can take time off yourself? I guess only when you sleep. Kisses to all PMS victims.

  • Emmanor March, 13 2014, 5:08 / Reply

    Contre l’excès d’émotivité, je prends du magnésium, c’est pas mal.
    Contre les gonflements, j’ai pas trouvé.
    Sinon, j’ai mal au ventre avant et mal à la tête après …
    Mais bon, je vais avoir 47 ans, ça devrait bientôt être fini tout ça … en attendant la pré ménopause !!!!!

  • You should try an app like Period Tracker to keep track of your periods and PMS.
    It works great! It changed my life and my girlfriends’s too

  • What a good post..

    100% indentified with your SPM signs…

    Yes!, you are true…” the rest of the time, life is a walk in the park”



  • CAROLINA March, 13 2014, 5:22 / Reply

    “Être en mode SPM, c’est comme affronter un dragon.” Oui, et si tu souffres Endometrosis, tu as un dragon en toi et tu ne le sais pas!!!
    Merci Garance!

  • mon mec se bidonne pendant les 3 premiers jours à me voir affronter les montagnes russes… et puis le 4ème il fait la gueule, parce que les loopings, ça va un moment. Je crois que je n’arrive pas encore à gérer ce SPM. :(

  • Mon Dieu je ne suis pas seule !
    La dernière fois j’ai fondu en larmes devant la propriétaire de mon appart.
    Juste parce qu’elle a dit ” ça n’a pas l’air de trop aller ?” rapport à ma mine juste un peu fatiguée.
    Elle me prend pour une dépressive depuis…
    J’ai décidé de me mettre à l’homéopathie et à l’acupuncture, j’espère voir des résultats bientot !
    Je pensais vraiment etre un cas à part, que ça me fiche à plat 1 jour par mois tous les mois, parce que je connais beaucoup de filles pour qui ça ne change strictement rien cette periode-là…
    et ensuite j’en ai un peu parlé et plusieurs amies m’ont avoué pleurer pour rien aussi à cette période, ouf!

  • nastassia March, 13 2014, 5:33 / Reply

    Awesome post, thanks for going beyond the potential awkwardness of the subject! And you might be interested to know that l’huile d’onagre might be of help in rebalancing the hormonal system, therefore reducing very much PMS

  • Céline March, 13 2014, 5:38 / Reply

    Merci Garance pour cet article qui tombe à pic car j’ai vécu un SPM horrible la semaine dernière: cette fois il a duré 7 jours !!! (avant et pendants mes règles, crap !)

    Je voulais juste rester toute la journée en pyjama dans mon lit tellement j’étais fatiguée, irritable et surtout gonflée au niveau de l’estomac et du ventre. J’ai même passé toute une journée avec le bouton de mon pantalon ouvert et la braguette à moitié descendue (cachée sous mon pull) à agir comme si tout allait bien alors que je n’en pouvais plus.
    Je suis d’accord avec toi sur le fait que la majorité des gens ne s’aperçoivent même pas de notre état car en plus de souffrir, on essaie de gérer notre image car le lâcher prise passerait pour de la faiblesse…alala c’est pas tous les jours facile d’être une femme.

    La seule récompense c’est la peau superbe que j’ai juste après le SPM :)

    Je voulais aussi remercier toutes celles qui ont donné des conseils (notamment homéopathiques) dans les commentaires. Je vais regarder tout ça de plus près ;)

  • Ah Garance ! merci encore pour ce post, tellement vrai et spontané ! fidèle lectrice depuis des années, je te lis toujours avec le même plaisir et le même émerveillement comment fais tu pour ne pas perdre cette fraicheur au fil de ta réussite ? Bravo ! keep on !
    Quant au SPM je connaissais bien, par coeur, sur le bout des doigts, tout niquel comme tu dis. Mais depuis 1 an j’ai un implant de progestérone dans le gras du bras. Depuis plus de règles, plus de SPM et c’est le pied. A tel point que j’en avais oublié le fameux SPM, jusqu’à ton billet.

  • hahaha this is so funny! Wait until you ever get pregnant.. You will be like this for 9 months straight (!!!) And the worse part is; even if you try to act like nothing has changed, people will give you that have-you-gotten-insane-?!?!?!- stare ;)

  • SO MANY COMMENTS! O.k…..have to put my input in here too! First of all, you are a part on the humans that are highly creative. You are an artist. You are very expressive and when the hormones kick in before your period, well, it just is like a pot of stew that cooks over, going over the edges of the pot and God help anyone who is close by. It is not a pretty site. BUT, try to visualize something calming when you are getting overheated by emotions at this time. JUST…. STOP! I definitely think we can train ourselves mentally to keep the heat low enough so we keep on cooking, but not to boil over. It´s releasing of controlled energy. And I think that sometimes we have to be better at put stuff on the back burner. I like reading the American Indian comment about the menstruating women having their own teepees to go to. They were soooo in contact with nature, their creative spirits, and were wise in so many ways. I think the modern world has sooooo removed us from being mindful and take time to reflect and get in contact with our different purposes in life. Life is so busy, busy,busy! We are supposed to deliver, be efficient, and productive all the time 24/7. Not good. SO….be nicer to yourself! IT´S OK!!!!!

    Thanks for your post about THIS!!!!!!

  • Cet article tombe à pic, je suis en plein dedans !

    En général, je suis d’une humeur de chien, j’ai envie de flinguer tout le monde et je suis au plus bas niveau créativité et moral ! Je suis hyper fatiguée, complètement à la ramasse ! Parfois boutons parfois rien ! Bref c’est pas la joie heureusement ça ne dure pas longtemps ;) Merci pour ton article, ça m’a bien fait rigoler :))

  • lolotte68 March, 13 2014, 6:37 / Reply

    Welcome to my world!
    Alors moi j’ai eu de la chance, rien de tout ça dans mes jeunes années, et puis, et puis, … pré -ménopause! L’HORREUR!!! Mêmes symptômes, mais tout le temps. Et alors là, ce qui marche bien, c’est l’homéopathie. C’est sérieux, adapté à ton cas, et ça change la vie! Je te conseille d’essayer, tu ne devrais pas le regretter!

  • Stéphanie March, 13 2014, 6:40 / Reply

    Personnellement j’ai nettement amélioré le SPM en prenant de l’onagre (1 gélule par jour et 2 dans les dix-quinze jours qui précèdent l’arrivée des “copines”). Il faut le prendre en continu, et en plus c’est bon pour la peau !
    Tous les symptômes se sont améliorés, même le coup de cafard, toujours là mais moins important ! (Au point que je le cherchais !)… Beaucoup d’aliments riches en potassium dans les jours qui précèdent aussi : bananes par ex ; )

    Courage !
    Essaie : se sentir bien c’est quand même important !

  • Healthy food and much water! That´s what I was told when I asked for help with the same problem

  • I am always told I look very tired! And I do tend to snap more. The pain, suffering and mood swings? All in preparation for pregnancy and childbirth! The upside for me? NO PMS/period for 2 years!

  • Garance I know your pain! I have found that some months the PMS can be akin to a type of depression and I truly believe that half of the battle is knowing what it is, what is happening to your body and that IT WILL PASS. Once I realise I’m not a terrible person, daughter, girlfriend and that what I am experiencing is natural a weight is lifted. Once thing I cannot recommend enough is to monitor your diet. Certain foods and supplements limit the effects of PMS and hormonal imbalance in general – brown rice, fruits, vegetables, beans, legumes and lentils and turkey have really helped me. I hope this is helpful. x

  • Oui mais maintenant, il y a la CUP ! Je sais pas, mais depuis que je ne me prends plus le chou avec serviettes et tampons, j’appréhende dix fois moins cette période. Pas de pub parce que le lobby des serviettes et tampons doit être vachement puissant, pas vendu en supermarché, mais top pour faire comme si ta vie était toujours normale.

    Pour preuve cette vidéo géniallissime :

    Toutes à vos cup

  • Tu me fait tellement rire Garance!
    Le passage discussion avec mon mec c’est tellement ca!!!!!!
    je croyais m’y voir!

    merci pour toute ses super articles qui font réalisés qu’on est pas les seules…


    Sophie de Around la Mode

  • Bonjour Garance,

    Merci pour ce post très drôle…car si vrai!
    Il y a un documentaire sur ce sujet à voir absolument (sous la couette avec un paquet de granola): “la lune en moi”.
    Libérateur (car non, nous ne sommes pas folles) et tellement intelligent (comme nous toutes quoi), je vous le recommande à toutes (et à tous, après tout)!
    Et tant que j’y suis, bravo Garance pour votre blog. Votre bonne humeur est communicative et la novice que je suis apprend beaucoup à vous lire.
    Bravo et continuez à nous régaler par votre humour et votre générosité!

  • I could not find the documentary online, but here is a ted talk of its author – about menstruation, pms …

  • Magdalena March, 13 2014, 8:58 / Reply

    Ha ha, it’s like I was reading about myself. I really don’t know why people always connect woman’s anger with period. I mean, it’s not period, it’s PRE-period! Three worst days in the month. I look like sh*t, i feel like sh*t as well. I hate everything about me then – how do i look, how do i dress, how do i talk, live, and so on. I really prefer period crumps than this emotional roller coaster before period.

  • Tellement vrai…

  • Caroline March, 13 2014, 10:55 / Reply

    Je viens de lire ça sur le blog de Martin Vidberg, ça me semble assez approprié :

  • Thanks for this post. After reading it, I couldn’t help yelling at my screen, “Garance understands!” :) Sidenote: I use the app “My Days” to help keep track. It can predict the next visit for you from the data you input, so you’re well prepared ahead of time.

  • L’huile d’onagre en capsule, ça marche super bien, aussi bien sur le SPM que sur l’acné du au désequilibre hormonal (souvent suite à l’arret de la pillule). Moi j’en prends et aucun SPM
    Bises et courage

  • Pimastreet March, 13 2014, 3:02 / Reply

    SPM ou comment passer en moins de temps qu’il ne le faut pour dire ouf… bah en mode cruella !! J’ai la chance d’avoir un mari habitué à cette transformation mensuelle, mais il est vrai que l’effet est plutôt navrant. La moindre contrariété est à deux doigts De me faire pleurer, énervée pour des broutilles et gonflement ! What else….

  • One thing I love about your blog is how unique and refreshingly honest it is! One thing that helps me in the monster week is working out. I don’t really get emotional but I do feel really sick the first two days, and running surprisingly helps with the cramps. Thanks for this post! :)

  • Sooo true!!
    One question: does anybody cry on the fifth day since the start of the period, or is it only me?
    I mean:
    day -1: pms
    day 0: period starts
    day 1: period
    day 2: period
    day 5: still period, and you spend at least an hour crying your eyes out for no apparent reason
    It’s been going on for ages, and I think it must have some hormonal reason, but I don’t know (I’m no doctor).
    Bye girls!

  • Michelle March, 13 2014, 9:29 / Reply

    You’re not alone!

  • Hello Garance,

    This isn’t related to your article which I really loved, but more related to the translation of the article..

    Interestingly I was half way through your article and scrolled back to the top to see who the author as it and then I noticed you have got a new translator.. Amazing how the translation conveys different characteristics of you!


  • Mais pourquoi, pourquoi, pourquoi au bout de quoi, 20 ans de SPM je ne note toujours pas la date de son apparition dans mon agenda moi aussi ???

    Faut-il être si bête !!!

    Donc perso c’est pareils, niveau physique et émotionnel. Toutes les mêmes !

  • Erin Yee March, 14 2014, 7:27 / Reply

    Hello Garance,

    May I ask if there are any alternative therapies that help lessen the symptoms? I’m currently in school for Chinese Medicine (acupuncture, herbs, etc.) and this is a common problem for many women. I’ve found that with regular treatment and herbs, especially if taken during the period of time when the symptoms are most intense, it can help tremendously. If you’re interested I’d be happy to tell you more!


  • Hey Garance! You simply have to read this book! You have way too much acid in your body or in other words you are suffering from an acid-base imbalance!

    And this book is highly recommended for all kind of health problems that women have! A Woman’s Best Medicine by Nancy Lonsdorf

  • I think it’s pretty safe to say: Hormones suck.

    In the last few years (i think we’re about the same age, Garance), I’ve been getting super tired a week in advance. It warns me of the impending monthly ‘red dawn’.
    Of course, there’s also the bloating (feels like I gain 5 kilos every time), the painful, bloated breasts, the acne, the hunger and the irritability. Fun fun.
    What always amazes me is how fast it all disappears when my period finally comes around (yes, cuz after a while, I’m praying for the damn thing to start, so I can go back to a normal life).

    Sometimes, I get lucky and get very few PMS symptoms. Don’t know how that works…

    I have noticed though that some of my symptoms are lessened or don’t come around as much when I’ve been doing regular physical activity (in my case, ballet). It’s particularly awesome for the breast area. I find it definitely stops them from gaining a cup size overnight. If only it would also prevent the bloating…

    And then, the period arrives… I’ve always had very painful cramps in the first few days. It got so bad that I actually passed out on the subway platform at 125th Street in Harlem! Hehe, I freaked out a cop who came to my rescue (I didn’t fall on the tracks, worry not). He was like “What’s wrong?! Are you ok?!” So I whispered, kinda embarrassed, that I had my period. “You’re pregnant??”. Ok, so he wasn’t the brightest crayon in the box, but he watched over me until the medics came to take care of me.
    After that incident, my gyno gave me miracle subscription pills to prevent that. Bye bye horrific menstrual cramps. Funny enough, since giving birth to my daughter, such horrible cramps don’t come around as much anymore.

  • Ahaha ! c’est tellement vrai ! merveilleux post merci !
    je pense que les femmes sont vraiment plus fortes du fait de toutes les douleurs que l’on supporte toute notre vie (SPM, épilationS, ton paternaliste, accouchement) et le tout avec le menton haut, sans broncher.
    Quand on y pense, c’est peut être nous Dieu

    Palme académique décernée à la sensiblerie émotionnelle qui me prend en cas de SPM (pleurer pour vraiment rien : passage à la caisse d’un supermarché, rater son bus et attendre celui d’après qui est dans 1,5min, ne pas retrouver la 2è chaussette. Les drames d’une vie).
    Même si je sais toujours quand le SPM va frapper, rassure-toi Garance, ça ne change rien de le savoir.

  • May I suggest two things which help me? Taking extra Vitamin B6 the week before a period and during the week of a period plus take cod liver oil tablets. The cod liver oil tablets seem to balance out the strange things that happen to your skin and the B6 works wonders with cramp etc. I had very heavy periods which were made worse as I have von Willebrands (a blood disorder) which mean the cramping at the beginning of a period would be so painful it was difficult to walk or even stand sometimes. Both cod liver oil tablets and vitamin B6 gave me back that week each month.

  • ….on apprendre des choses ;-)))….
    P.S: j’aime ton dessin, dans mon cas, j’adopte cette position les jours de mes règles quand elles sont un peu douloureuses, heureusement ne sont pas tous les mois comme ça :)

  • Très beau post!

    Figure-toi que j’ai fait ma thèse de médecine sur le SPM, tellement ça me pourrit la vie! :)

  • Caroline March, 17 2014, 7:16 / Reply

    Hello Garance!
    One on the things I love about your blog is that it creates a unique kind of communication between you and your readers. It’s like a big, friendly conversation. I think this is the thing which makes people want to come back to your blog again and again. Positive vibes are all around here!
    I’d like to share with you my recent thoughts :) About month ago, I saw a presentation about breast cancer and I started to wonder how many women check their breasts regulary?
    Breast cancer is getting more and more common and we often forgot about it. But someday it may hit us. The key for success is prevention. I think it’s extremely important to remind women about the consequences. If we talk about PMS why not talk about breast cancer? Last week we had International Women’s Day so maybe we should make a gift for ourselves and be more aware of this issue and start to check our breasts regulary. It may really make a difference. What do you think about this issue?


  • Alexandra March, 18 2014, 4:21 / Reply

    Please, please, please read ‘WOMAN CODE’ by Alisa Vitti. It will change your life and PMS forever!

  • I am a woman and I don’t have PMS. When I don’t move enough (not enough physical activity) I’d have to take a painkiller on the first day of my period for the cramps but that’s it. I find it a bit sad really how much attention is paid to the topic of PMS and how it’s virtually the only “girls talk” topic EVER discussed. Surely there’s more to being a woman than PMSing?

  • Oh que oui ça fait beaucoup plus mal de se faire épiler à ce moment là !

  • Hélène June, 12 2014, 3:40 / Reply

    TELLEMENT vrai !! On est gouvernées par nos hormones c’est dingue :)

    Le truc de fou c’est que c’est un mini-enfer TOUS LES MOIS !

    Perso, c’est les seins et le ventre gonflés, et ça me gonfle c’est le cas de le dire. AHAH

  • bonjour!
    je suis en plein dedans! j’en ai tellement marre de bourgeonner chaque mois (et c’est PIRE qu’a 15 ans) que j’en arrive a rever de menopause… c’est grave non?

  • Thanks for finally writing about >Girls Talk – Garance Doré <Liked it!

  • Fantastic read!

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