No Arm Done
9 years ago by
Let’s talk about our best physical features.
Here’s my thinking: we’re so often told to embrace our inner beauty, but shouldn’t we find a part of our physical selves to love too?
We all kind of know that beauty is perception (eye of the beholder, etc), but it’s easy to lose sight of that when it feels like everything is falling apart.
My favorites are weird (no judgment, please): my ears and eyelashes. It’s probably because they won’t gain 2 lbs overnight, ha.
I have a friend who loves her tiny ankles (what is it, the year 1772?). When I looked it up online (once I had filtered out all of the “weirdest fetishes” articles), things got even more obscure. It’s all subjective, but it’s cool to have your thing – to love your third nipple or the back of your knees, or… whatever it is, own it!
But sometimes it takes someone else to point out that feature before you see its worth.
During a meeting the other day G turned to me and said, super excited, “Your arms!”
I have never ever thought about my arms. I’m too preoccupied worrying about my butt and abs. Then I asked my boyfriend what he thought about my arms and he was like, “Oh, yeah! Your yoga arms.”
So now have a new thing. The other day when I was at yoga about to fall flat on my face into a pool of my own sweat, instead of worrying about my non-washboard stomach, I focused on my arms. Acknowledging that they’re not so bad was empowering.
In the studio, Brie has the abs. Yes, the abs. Emily’s got the eyes. And G? Well, we decided for her – boobs! ;) These are the parts of ourselves that, come mile 25 of a marathon, we can hold onto and feel good about (plus what’s on the inside).
I suppose physical beauty, like all things is about a glass half full: choose to see the good, and you eliminate the bad.
——-
p.s. if you want to know, I go to yoga at Modo – Lawrence and Randy are my arm gurus.
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Features
From the Archives: Tonal Dressing
About two years ago I noticed how I no longer want to wear sleeveless garments. Neck, waist, tummy, legs,.. all is pretty ok, I do not need to care what to wear, but when I see my arms I have a problem. And I do not want to look like Anna Wintour or like Madonna either, so just short sleeves for me. :-)
I adore this body positive talk! There are parts of us that are stunning and different and totally our own that we haven’t considered. My ears are small – so I like love them – I mean, abnormally tiny. I like my nails and how strong they are, it’s such a gift!
Warm Regards,
Alexandra
http://www.littlewildheart.com
I love my eyes…and the best part is taht I haven’t to work out them ;-))
XOX, Gap.
http://www.gaptoothedgirl.com
I like every part – why should we assume it’s a given to feel bad about anything?
I agree. I know this post is meant to be positive, but I find the idea of reducing my body to a breakdown of “parts,” some good and some bad — really off-putting.
I like all of me. Even — and especially — the parts that don’t register as “perfect” by society’s ideals. Slightly mushy abs? Yeah. They’re mine. I like ’em. The assumption that we automatically hate our bodies and have to search for good things seems rather sad.
Not at all. I don’t hate things about myself, I just like certain physical parts more than others. Maybe one day I’ll celebrate them all equally…
But I love that you like all of you! You should celebrate that, absolutely!
I feel the same way.
I think that’s wonderful – I wish I felt that way about my body! As time goes on, I appreciate it more and more but I still occasionally have a bad day. As I mentioned, I really do believe that beauty is perception. I feel as though sometimes people (or maybe it’s more those I know) are afraid to embrace their physical selves, but they shouldn’t.
It’s not just about liking, but celebrating parts or all of ourselves!
I love my lips! I really like your phrase: choose to see the good, and you eliminate the bad.
http://heelsandpeplum.com/
Merci de me le rappeler! Je suis aussi toujours occupée à prendre soin du trio fesses/abdos/poitrine – en même temps, prenez un magazine féminin à l’approche de l’été, aucun ne donnera d’astuce pour raffermir ses chevilles ou affiner ses oreilles :p – c’est mon homme et ses compliments parfois surprenants qui me font réaliser qu’il n’y a pas que ça dans la vie ;)
Cécile
http://www.maxcebycecilej.com
this is odd to explain but I’m really short only 5ft tall (1m52) but I have long arms, legs and fingers — that’s what I like my long limbs that make me seem taller while still being petite
http://hashtagliz.com
In many different culture there are different parts of the body which are important…and different parts that we show easily and others which you don’t show easily …so i believe that the perception of our body is very much influenced by the country we live in the tradition of what is consider beautiful in this country and also fashion….trends..…
i believe in loving what you have and i believe you can always work out to get the best of you physically and morally…
xoxo
Yael Guetta
http://www.ftwwl.com
Love your thoughts on this, Yael!
Thank you xx
Love this. It’s too easy to get hyper-focused on muffin-tops and and some cellulite-zone but guess what??? There’s someone out there wishing they had your hair, your skin-tone, your flat chest, your big butt and your wide shoulders, whatever! I’m in my 40’s now, so I’ve gone through this, but I can remember my hilarious OBGYN saying to me, years ago, “oh, you’re the girl with the skinny arms. I hated you in med school”! And like you, I no idea… We all got something someone else wants.
Yes!!!
where is the bracelet from? it is beautiful!
Mine’s clearly my eyes. I wish it was my hair or abs, but hey, my eyes are pretty alluring, so I’m not sad about not wearing crop tops all the time.
When I was younger people would compliment my hourglass figure all the time, but I just wouldn’t have it. Now, 20 years later, after two kids and a lot of extra pounds, I appreciate my proportions. I spent my entire life straightening my curly hair, now I absolutely love my wild mixed race curls and they only garner positive feedback, even in my seriously professional work life. I like the shape of my legs (always have) and I love my lips, I can really rock a good lipstick.
I think that what happened is that I realised that life is about other things, really. Love yourself. Love others. Just LIVE; life is way too short for this kind of navel gazing.
I like my eyes and lips, hate my hair and boobs, oh and my butt but I’m working on it
I might not be perfect (who is, even Gisele might have something bad about her) but nobody has ever throw at my face for that so I’m fine!
Hey,
Soyons Honnêtes la beauté physique est super importante! On en parle partout… Première impression que l’on donne aux gens et que nous avons d’eux. C’est pas hyper important ça!!!
Alors pensez à vos cernes:
http://www.blushandbeyond.com/maquillqge/comment-faire-disparaitre-vos-ombres-autour-des-yeux/
Bisous
Alix
Great post! I agree we should find what is good about us or what we love about ourselves and push that forward, instead of focusing so much on what is wrong or what we can’t have. i mean we can still work on improving those other things but our focus should be on what’s great about us. It also makes owning our imperfection easier, and I believe that when we finally embrace our imperfection is when we truly become powerful. Loving what’s great and embracing the imperfect (owning who you are) is the key to happiness. We all have something to be proud of, but as you said Neada some times we need the people around us to open our eyes to what those things might be. Ok, this is sounding a little too guruish, so I’ll stop now:))
Love my yoga arms and my eyes. I have to admit that yoga is helping me feel better about the rest of me. You start to look at the strength you gain both outside and in. It is nice when you are having a low confidence day to catch a more loved feature and find peace. Life is a fun journey,
Hahaha It’s ears for me too! You know how you can have recessive ears, where the lobe is not separated or hanging, but more like a continuation of your face? That’s my thing, and I love wearing really high buns or pony tails :). My husband’s are the other kind, but our baby got mine, and it sort of makes me proud. How dumb right?
I imagine you guys at your studio like: OMG your socks are AWESOME! NO wait, yours are cuter!! I have never notice your navel, it’s so …symmetric! Wait, you have a really beautiful middle finger… and then Garance enters and you’re all like bowing hehe, kidding
photo splendide
C’est super je trouve de se trouver des qualités physiques, et c’est vrai que ces deux bras en photo sont magnifiques, soulignés par une bague et un bracelet or, ils sont élégants :) J’aime beaucoup cet article, qui donne à chacune d’entre nous, l’envie de se trouver belles :) Merci!
http://www.taimemode-fashionblog.com
http://photosfrench.blogspot.fr
Before my kids I had great abs, flat. Now not so much and I was ok with that until this new wave of barre, yoga, detox, shake-whatever moms have taken over. Now I can’t help but notice my not flat abs. But I don’t have the time or money to workout as I want so I dress as best as I can to make me feel like a million dollars. I’m ok with a lot of things, working to love them more but also working to do more to help me love them more.
So yes focusing on eyes, wrists, shoulders, neckline, hair, anything that is more positive, yes!
“Choose to see the good, and you eliminate the bad.” If only I could do this. I’m constantly preoccupied with my ‘flaws’. It’s most definitely in the eyes of the beholder since many people find those things I worry about nice, charming or even beautiful. I’m struggling with beauty every day. My beautiful arms are sometimes even attacked by my own criticism. Negative spiral definitely! The strangest thing about beauty is that I love ‘imperfections’ on other people. A gap between their teeth for example. I have very nice teeth but the only thing I see is the tiny crook in one of them. Having that said, I love my ears as well. My favourite thing about myself are my freckles and other beauty marks. Those I will never hate :)
Je pense que la beauté intérieure est indissociable de la beauté extérieure. La perception qu’on a d’une personne change souvent à cause ou grâce à sa personnalité. Une femme magnifique avec un mauvais fond ne sera pas aussi belle qu’une femme de physique moins avantageux avec une magnifique personnalité. L’amour, on en parle malheureusement pas souvent, mais le simple fait de prendre conscience qu’on est aimé aide à nous aimer aussi bien physiquement que mentalement.
What I love most about this piece is that you aren’t advocating for a particular standard of beauty; you’re just highlighting the features you’re proud of, that make you feel good, strong, and empowered. Our bodies are wonderful and I think we should all try and find those things in ourselves. While we should aim to celebrate it as a whole with the good and the “bad”, it’s also nice to step back and find the little things we love.
P.S. Your yoga arms are fantastic! They look so strong and lean.
I have always thought my proportions were strange- long torso, short arms and legs, skinny waist, thick butt and thighs, big feet. But I worked as a figure model (re: posing nude) in art classes for a few years and sometimes got feedback from the artists about my body that made me appreciate my “atypical” body.
People would tell me that they loved drawing my long neck, the soft shapes of my legs, my intense brow bones— all things that I had never noticed before. It helped me to appreciate my body exactly BECAUSE it was “atypical”. One of my favorite moments of personal growth.
why feel so ashmaded to express this love?
“My favorites are weird (no judgment, please)”, why are you putting yourself down like it’s weird and you are going to be judged for liking a part of your own body?
“I focused on my arms. Acknowledging that they’re not so bad was empowering.” not so bad? why not say hella good?
I don’t get it, wouldn’t it just feel great to say “FUCK, MY ARMS LOOKS FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC TODAY!” out loud and really think that way too? Not this “well, I guess my arms are kinda OK.. but here’s to remind you that I’m not actually complimenting myself so I’ll in the same breath say that my abs are not washboard hard like omg im not perfect”. COME ON! it’s ok to be brash and like yourself, even like the parts that may not be “”perfect”” (whatever that is). why all this hesitation and hedging?
Eyes! Legs! High cheekbones! :) I wish I had saw that in my 20′- it would have saved me a lot of anguish.
Ana
http://www.champagmegirlsabouttown.co.uk
A few years ago, I was at the gym, bemoaning to my trainer about my big flabby thighs (my legs look like two funnels. Garance has the legs I’d kill for) when I looked out the window and crossing the street was a stunning young woman, slim, gorgeous, walking with crutches as she had only one leg. It was like a slap across the face. I have no doubt she’s happily take on my jiggly leg, cellulite and all. And from then on, I’ve tried to focus on all the marvelous things my body can do, rather than what it looks like. I can dance like a fool, walk across the globe, wiggle my toes in the sand. My legs are perfect!
I couldn’t agrre more! It’s good to be nice with ourselves and focus on our assets for a change!
???
Jeanne
http://fashionmusingsdiary.com
Your ears are going to keep growing…as your nose ;) !
Oui c’est vrai que l’on à tendance à regarder plutôt ce qui ne va pas….
En attendant de trouver ce que j’aime sur mon corps : J’adore ce bracelet…ce jonc d’une pureté je cherche le même c’est qui ?
Merci Cath
Mile 25 of a marathon? I’m usually thinking of a bowl of pasta, accompanied by a chilled lemonade, beer and sparkling water :) But otherwise than that, I think my best features are my lips, ears, eyes, arms and my butt. I’ve also been told that I had nice Achilles tendons, but it’s a bit difficult for me to comment on that one ;)
Oui le bracelet, on peut savoir d’où il vient?
MODO is the best. Randy & Lawrence are wonderful, and try a class with Karine or Guillaume or Michelle!!
Détrompez-vous, ma chère! Les oreilles, ce n’est pas l’éternelle jeunesse.
À 67 ans, je me fiche bien d’avoir des rides, j’aime bien mes cheveux argentés, je soigne mes dents… Mais il y a trois problèmes inéluctables du vieillissement dont on ne parle que peu, et que l’industrie anti-âge ignore : les poils superflus au visage, la tendance à s’agrandir du nez et… des lobes des oreilles! Eh oui ; regardez autour de vous !
Bon, il vous reste les cils et les bras, ce n’est déjà pas mal..
great self-confidence video: http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2015/03/16/dove-one-beautiful-thought_n_6880918.html
Ahhh, Neada- “all of me, and all of you” is my response to “what are the favourite parts of yourself” xo
I’m working on the body, but I love my lips and nose! :)