Over the last year, I’ve talked openly about my mental health. When shit hit the fan I felt that it was important for me to do so. . Then something funny happened. The posts where I opened up seemed to get more likes, more attention, more feedback – which is okay! It’s normal to feel more connected when someone is being honest. But attention can also become weirdly addictive, as we all know very well. It took me a second to understand what was going on. . One day, one of my friends whose IG talks a lot about her mental illness told me that all her audience wanted were her crazy, teary, activated moments. And that, well, she felt kind of trapped into that persona. . The thing is, I have never identified with my depression. It was a moment in time. I am healed. I am good! So, when I started feeling better, I had to learn to let go of the kind of attention you get when you’re… In pain. . The quest for attention is endless. It can be making a disease into a schtick, getting addicted to posting sexy photos, feeling like we have to spend our life traveling to make it interesting… It can escalate quite fast. . At the point when I understood I was healed, talked about it because I think it is a message as important as talking about the fact that anyone can go through a depression. I let go of that sort of attention – and went back to a life with its usual highs, and lows. . By doing that, making sure I wasn’t glamorizing depression just for likes. . The @newyorkermag recently wrote about this, citing the story I posted a little less than a year ago, calling it an “early sign of the times” and calling this the “getting real” post – you should read – it’s good. I’ll put the link in my bio. . Today is #mentalhealthawareness day and I thought it was good day to talk about all this. As we’re all becoming mini “brands” it’s easy to stay stuck in the version of ourselves that seems to get the most attention. . But behind the screens, here we are. Ever changing, fascinating, boring, happy, aching. It’s important to let ourselves be open and vulnerable to change and growth… and healing. And not derive our sense of self from the outside. Our mental health depends on it.
6 years ago by
