7 years ago by
Comme vous le savez peut-être, je suis encore assez nouvelle ici à l’Atelier… Quand j’ai rencontré Garance en novembre dernier, j’avais passé 10 ans à travailler dans un environnement quasi-exclusivement masculin, et prendre la décision de venir travailler dans une petite équipe exclusivement composée de femmes, ce n’était pas rien pour moi. Un des avantages, dont je ne m’étais même pas rendu compte, c’était la liberté avec laquelle je pourrais enfin parler de mes règles. Pendant 10 ans, je les ai passées sous silence, alors que trois jours par mois, j’étais presque à l’agonie, sans oser expliquer les raisons de cette baisse de régime à mon boss ou à mes collègues. Pouvoir dire à Emily ou Natalie que si j’ai parfois des crampes et des migraines terribles, c’est à cause de mes règles, et savoir qu’elles comprennent, ça a vraiment changé ma vie professionnelle. Alors voilà, pour partager ce soulagement de pouvoir enfin parler ouvertement des règles, voici quelques témoignages de mes collègues qui viennent alimenter ou déconstruire tous les clichés sur les règles, leurs symptômes et désagréments…
On s’habitue à leur arrivée tous les mois…
Garance, 41:
Je pense que le truc le plus marquant concernant mes règles, à part les douleurs poignantes que j’ai réussi à calmer ces dernières années grâce au yoga et à l’acupuncture (plus besoin de prendre d’Advil, woohoo!) c’est qu’à chaque fois, mais alors à chaque fois, mes règles me surprennent.
Et pourtant, elles sont aussi régulières que les sourcils de Kim Kardashian. 28 jours, pof, elles débarquent.
Et pourtant, j’ai à peu près cinq différentes app pour traquer mon cycle.
Et pourtant, je PMS comme une malade – quel meilleur moyen de me rafraîchir la mémoire ?
Et pourtant Chris, qui n’en peut plus de mes sautes d’humeur, suit les rythmes de la lune sur sa montre (Oui, il a une montre, trop belle, qui montre la lune, c’est une Omega Speedmaster Moonwatch) et sait avant moi quand il est temps d’évacuer le terrain je vais avoir mes règles.
Et pourtant, donc, je suis toujours aussi surprise. À chaque fois, c’est la catastrophe, je n’ai plus de tampons (ce qui est une galère d’un niveau nouveau depuis que j’ai décidé de ne plus porter que des protections organiques qui ne se trouvent pas au CVS du coin), j’ai peur d’avoir mal, je pleure d’émotion à la moindre photo de chat sur Instagram (Non mais tu vois, Chris, comme c’est beau, la vie!)(il n’est pas là en fait, il a déserté, il est gone surfing pour trois jours, parce que lui, il SAIT)(mais c’est pas grave, je lui parle par texto, un long fil de iMessages bleus à qui personne ne répondra jamais), il pleut, et je porte un jean blanc.
C’est la vie, c’est comme ça. Je suis comme Lulu, notre chienne, qui hier à la plage jouait avec sa balle toute seule comme une grande, faisant semblant de la perdre puis sautant de joie de l’avoir retrouvée.
J’aime l’aventure, moi, j’aime la surprise, j’aime vivre ma vie de femme dangereusement, voyez ?
Enfin bon. Et surtout, je suis super pas du tout organisée.
Je déteste (avoir) mes règles…
MJ, notre stagiaire, 51 :
J’avais 15 ans et sept mois quand j’ai eu mes premières règles. J’en ai encore un souvenir très vif. Pendant mes années de lycée et à la fac, je détestais cette période du mois ! Alors que je luttais contre des symptômes comme les migraines, les ballonnements, et les crampes, je priais pour que me soit révélée la véritable utilité de ces souffrances… même si j’avais du mal à me projeter dans autre chose que cette terrible sensation d’inconfort. Avec les années, les symptômes se sont adoucis, j’ai eu un enfant. Mes règles sont devenues un non-événement régulier que j’ai appris à chérir, car sans elles, le miracle de la vie cesserait d’exister. Alors que mon cycle féminin approche de la fin, je savoure cette essence de la féminité. Les désagréables symptômes d’antan sont réapparus, de manière plus pénible encore. Mais avec l’âge et l’expérience, je ne me laisse plus déstabiliser par mes règles, comme j’ai pu le faire adolescente. Toutes les parcelles de mon corps en phase de péri-ménopause sont tendues vers ces ultimes manifestations de ma féminité, afin que je n’oublie jamais ce sentiment si doux d’être une femme. C’est un phénomène sublime que je suis triste de voir s’éloigner.
Le SPM (Syndrome pré-menstruel) rend hystérique…
Natalie, 25:
J’aimerais tellement pouvoir vous écrire quelque chose qui viendrait mettre fin à l’idée que le SPM transforme certaines femmes en folles hystériques. Mais la vérité, c’est que je ne peux pas. Je suis l’incarnation même de ce stéréotype du SPM. Il commence (et dure, de façon plus ou moins aigüe) 10 jours avant le début de mes règles. Et tous les mois, je me retrouve à hurler sur mes pauvres collègues (pardon, les filles, je n’y peux rien), à lever les mains en l’air en signe d’impuissance (sans trop savoir pourquoi), à m’énerver contre ma sœur quand elle m’envoie des sms du genre « Tu me manques, voyons-nous cette semaine » (non mais pour qui elle se prend ?). Donc oui, le SPM me transforme en une espèce de folle hystéro. Tout ça pour dire que j’essaie de tenir, de prendre le temps de respirer profondément, et je n’oublie pas de me moquer de mon attitude monstrueuse tout en espérant que mes amis ne m’en voudront pas trop !
Toute manifestation visible de mes règles est une honte absolue…
Tori, 23:
Pour rester dans le même esprit d’ouverture et de franchise, j’irai droit au but : saigner du vagin tous les mois, ça peut être un peu sale, même si on fait super attention et qu’on a les meilleures intentions du monde. Moi, j’ai décidé d’arrêter de culpabiliser pour les fuites… Ça arrive ! Parfois, mes règles sont plus abondantes que d’habitude, je cours toute la journée et j’oublie de changer de tampon. Bref, j’ai appris à accepter la situation sans avoir honte. Je suis une femme, je ne suis pas parfaite, et ces saignements mensuels sont l’une des nombreuses manifestations complexes et belles du corps humain. Donc je ne laisserai pas une petite tache gâcher ma journée… et tant pis pour ceux qui la remarqueront, qu’ils fassent avec !
P.S. Pour revenir aux tampons… que ce soit au bureau ou à la maison avec votre boyfriend, pas besoin de les cacher dans une endroit hyper secret – soyez-en fières ! La féminité, ce n’est pas uniquement un lipstick ou une jolie jupe !
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And when the time comes when nature decides you are winding down with that part of your life you realize » my friend….you were here all along to remind me of my health, the miracle of my body that allows me to create life if I chose to, to cleanse and strengthen when I don’t…. »
And you realize that it was never as bad as you thought it was. And that maybe, just maybe you might miss it when it’s gone.
Celebrate your body – and all the gifts that come along with it.
Oh how I relished this post! I became pregnant in September 2015, and have yet to have another period because of breastfeeding. I never knew I would miss it so much!
why!?
The answer to « why?! » is pretty long and entails another topic about hormone imbalances that doesn’t get a lot of attention–just like periods–because it’s a rather unsexy topic. I see your promotion for IUDs, which is cool. But for me, periods represent stability in my health. I’d prefer to have them in my life.
Actually some IUDs (Copper T) are non-hormonal and do not disrupt your menstrual cycle. After a brief negative experience with hormonal birth control, this was the one I chose and it’s been great!
Good to know, thank you!
Depuis que le stérilet (DIU hormonal) est entré dans ma vie, j’ai totalement oublié le SPM et mes règles ont elles aussi tout simplement disparu depuis 5 ans (j’en ai 35) … Et je dis YEAAAAAAH!!!
Bon, j’ai quand même attendu d’avoir un enfant avant de passer à ce mode de contraception et j’avais un peu peur à l’idée de perdre cette « manifestation de féminité » mais en fait, c’est TELLEMENT BIEN! Libérée, délivrée!!! Plus besoin de courir après les tampons, finies les douleurs abdominales… Franchement je ne comprends pas pourquoi il n’est pas plus conseillé aux femmes qui ne sont pas dans une phase de « conception » (pour favoriser les naissances???), j’ai dû en parler moi-même à la mienne qui n’y a vu aucun inconvénient tant que le suivi est régulier (1 à 2 fois par an). Il est vrai que prendre des hormones n’est jamais bon mais il y en a aussi dans les pillules et implants alors… Bref, je suis convaincue par le stérilet et bien contente d’avoir bye bye à mes règles!
Je viens de me relire: j’ai dû en parler moi-même à la mienne -> ma gynéco!
Don’t want one? I have an IUD and no period (so great) – if you’re curious, my post is HERE
Merci pour cet article ! On en parle de plus en plus de manière décomplexée mais par encore assez.
Je viens de lire ce livre, « Ceci est mon sang » (d’Elise Thiebaut) qui parle de ce que vous évoquez toutes. Très instructif, je le recommande vivement pour aller plus loin !
No mention of a DivaCup ?? Mine has been around the world with me, twice! I never have to worry about finding tampons, let alone organic ones, again.
The Diva Cup is the source of much conversation around here! I constantly sing praises of it and have convinced a couple of my coworkers to try it. I think maybe we’ll talk about it more sometime soon x
As for cramps and moodiness may I suggest B Complex (B6 – most importantly). My doctor put me on it at age 27 (after a half-assed, PMS-induced suicide attempt) and honestly, I rarely had PMS once I started taking it. In fact my body didn’t swell up, my mood stayed even. I swear by this stuff… Now I’m 56 (as of last week!) and have managed to stay alive and not murder anyone else!
Give it a try but know that it doesn’t start working in a manner of minutes… it takes weeks so be patient…. and good luck!
Yes to a good B Complex. Make sure it is methylated (5-MTHF instead of folic acid, methyl B12 etc.) Folic acid is NOT the form available in food and it can mess with your body’s metabolism.
If pain/cramping and mood swings are a big issue, it’s probably even more important to get a good B12 full-spectrum supplement to start with. Global Healing’s VeganSafe gets rave reviews and seems to be very effective. (It’s very important not to take any old B12 — most of what is available is garbage because of the specific form of B12 used.) I can’t stress the need for B12 enough, especially for people who are vegan and any non-red meat eaters. It’s a very complex vitamin and it poorly absorbed by a lot of people.
If you take VeganSafe though, don’t take a B Complex unless vetted by someone who really knows what they are doing (the formula could clash), but do eat greens and veggies every day to get plenty of folate from natural sources. You need folate – it’s very important – but a lot of folate supplements can cause problems.
If you’re still having issues after taking VeganSafe and eating plenty of vegetables, then also do tests for other B vitamin deficiencies with a good functional medicine practitioner and address any deficiencies with specific doses (not a B complex). Your body may not be absorbing certain nutrients property.
Finally, adding a good Omega 3 supplement doesn’t hurt and will probably ease any cramps and pain; or eat a couple or servings of fatty fish such as wild salmon or sardines per week.
I will only say one thing: The Diva cup changed my life….so much comfort you have no idea. I strongly recommend it to everyone :)
YES! The Diva Cup is my best friend and I tell it to anyone who will listen x
YES to menstrual cups! I love the lunette.
Ah oui, j’allais en parler, la cup! Le truc qui fait qu’on n’a plus de fuite, plus de risque de ne pas en avoir au magasin du coin, et qu’on n’y pense plus. Ca a aussi changé ma vie, et celle de mes copines que j’ai bassinées. Ca n’enlève pas la douleur ni le SPM, mais on les oublie vraiment dans la journée.
Joli témoignage, celui de MJ…
Great piece!
Lately I’ve been asking myself why we go to such great lengths to hide this perfectly natural process from men, from society, from everyone. We’ve convinced ourselves that our own blood is bad. For millennia we’ve been taught that our body’s natural shedding process is shameful.
Yes, it is messy and uncomfortable, and I’m not saying bleed on everything — but menstruation’s taboo status needs to go!
I’m a huge fan of the Diva Cup as well!
Am I the only one here who has repeatedly tried menstrual cups and invariably ended up writhing in pain? It seems to change the life of everyone who tries it, I must say I am a little jealous…
The same. I’m so in pain i can’t stand more than 15 minutes the cup. It’s so frustrating when your friend tell you it has solved so many problems like cystitis and mycology.
When you can’t have children and the purpose of this monthly proof of your feminine nature push each month the ugly truth to your face when you only would like to forget. It took time to make a truce with my periods. Even now… When I’m down, i can’t find any purpose to this, and it’s overwhelming.
I had someone tell me I would miss it when it was gone and I hate to say that it is true. Those little hormones are so wonderful for keeping your body fluid and balanced. Plus it is such a huge shift in your body. It takes a bit to feel relevant again and not old.
Yes to the B12 and also a good maca suppliment or powder works wonders too. It helped with flow and cramps big time. It can get strong as you are transitioning to the non years. Diet is really huge in how you react too. I altered alot of my problems in my 40’s. Wish I had done it earlier.
I used a natural sponge toward the end and loved that over tampons.
YASSSS Tori! Preach giirrl! I’m SO over it. Buy new panties. It’s ALL good.
RIGHT?! Thank you, Celina :)
Je suis députée…. Et je préside une commission parlementaire… Un jour, en commission, j’ai fait une mini hémorragie. Le secrétaire de commission m’a chuchoté : « Mme la Présidente, il y a du sang sous votre chaise… » C’est, à ce moment que j’ai décidé de me faire opérer de mon fibrome.
Tori I TOTALLY share your point of view !! I had a leak just two days ago… not fun but neither a drama ! ;)
So happy to hear people share in my no-shame mentality on this one! Thank you for your comment, Juliette.
Tori x
Ha I don’t hide it from my male co-workers. « I need to run to the drugstore at lunch. » « Why? » « Feminine products. » « Ah okay. » Or a guy friend says, « You barely touched your lunch. » « Yeah I have my period and my stomach hurts. It’s killing my appetite. »
I find most guys aren’t even all that weird about it. They have moms, sisters and/or girlfriends — they know the deal. As long as women don’t use their periods as an excuse to be nasty to people (because it’s not an excuse to be rude), men won’t have an excuse to treat it as some sort of impediment. And if it’s not an impediment men stop acting weird about it.
YES, JB! I love this and you are so right. Thank you for your comment :)
Tori x
I was 100% on board with not being ashamed of carrying a tampon. I would carry them out in the open no problem. But I just moved to South Korea and now I feel like I have to be so discreet and smuggle them everywhere. I don’t actually know what the culture is like about it but I just feel so awkward now.
Sorry to hear that, Dean :/ Hopefully once you become more acclimated to the culture, you can go back to your prideful ways! I believe you can do it and thank you for this comment :)
Tori x
Try the diva cup! It’s much lower maintenance than using tampons. You only have to empty it a couple times a day even when flow is heavy.
I love this, a period piece! <3
For those of you who can, you should use menstrual cups, they come in different sizes and colors and brands and are made of silicone which is super hygienic for your body. And you can have it for years and years! Sadly I can't use them because of my endometriosis and the extreme cramps it gives me. So they aren't for everyone, but they are such a great product! And definitely worth a try.
Lets talk more about the female body! I love it!
Hey, I don’t think I can comment? I’m using Firefox. Does any one have the same problem?
We’re receiving your comments Caroline! x Natalie
I love my period, yes, I do.
It’s the PMS that sucks. During those 10 days before I’m really scared about those job occasions when you need to be calm and professional: it’s so difficult not to be influenced by our hormones.
That said, once the period arrives I feel the relief, the real feeling of everything going at the right place.
M
Read the Period Repair Manual by Lara Briden. A fountain of knowledge about having a healthy cycle, and the ways you can support it with food, lifestyle and minerals (e.g. magnesium & zinc). Changed the way I look at my cycle enormously, and even put me out of my lower back pain aaagony every month!
Please, please go on, and write a full article (not a mini) on menstrual cups !
It changed my life (and many of my friend’s), and talking about it here would be so great for girls who don’t know about it or who are afraid to try…!
I am adding my hooray for Diva Cups to the others who have already mentioned it. It took a little while for me to get the hang of it, but it has changed how I view my period. I feel more proud or at least aware of my body rather than grossed out as I often did using a tampon. It is liberating!
I posted my question under the interview with Christophe Robin, cuz, it’s about hair, but it is also about period, so I’ll paste it here too, maybe it gets answered quicker: I heared a statement the other day, which sounded like an urban legend, but it might be true: If you are dying your hair on the first day of your period, or during your period you don’t get the proper colour. Is this true? I am rather skeptical and cannot tell, as I am not dying my hair. Any experiences? Thanks!
I have read that the only reason not to dye your hair during your period is that the skin on your scalp may be more sensitive at that time, but it should not effect the colour that is deposited into your hair. It might make you feel better to have a fresh colour too.
I love these stories!!! Like any woman, I can relate to all of them. It is always so refreshing to put these conversations out there, like this. What a breath of fresh air! Thank you!
Marianne Rosenstiehl, photographe française a fait une très belle expo sur le sujet des règles.
How did I get through my life without discussing this with anyone except my mother when it first happened? My best friend and I hardly mentioned it. And my mother taught me to be modest as well as strong, and get on with my life in spite of inconvenience, pains, &c. She also told me about codeine in case the pain was bad, which it sometimes was.
It is a private thing, not to do with shame. Modern women have lost the idea of modesty. I would hate to listen to a bunch of women moaning about their period. I thought you were all « powerful » and going to run the world?
Excellent topic! After five years of secondary infertility – behind me with the birth of our second child thank God – I’ve had quite a history with my period. All those months and years hoping for a miracle and getting that damn period instead. And post failed IVF period is terrible. Now I have awful periods thanks to fibroids probably from IVF drugs. I schedule around my period to try to ease the load those days but still hate planning for it and never have enough pads. My angel husband has gone to the store for me on several occasions. Getting in touch with the monthly cycle of moods is so important! I get major Venus week highs…and major Pms. Thanks for this!
I’m with Tori!!! Yes girl! I was always like that, it’s natural, it’s a part of who we are. Why hide it?!??! I always discussed it also with all my boyfriends, so they would and could better understand. I think it is an incredible way of nature showing us what our bodies can do.
I have had terrible PMS until recently, I don’t know if it was the diet change or vitamin B or magnesium, but I get no bloating, no tender breasts, no crazy mood swings. When I got my last period my boyfriend asked me: « But how, you were ‘normal’ all the time and didn’t yell at me once… » ?
Hello Audrey,
Quelle est la marque de ce bel ensemble de lingerie ?
Merci!
To Garance: I found out about LOLA this year. Organic tampon delivery service (and really cute branding!) Also, the founders seem really sweet and honest. Check them out!
https://www.mylola.com/
Hello audrey
Je ne suis pas sure que les commentaires apparaissent j’ai un message d’erreur. Bref au casva ou j’aurais bien aime connaitre la marque de ce bel ensemble de lingerie !
Merci!
What is the lingerie brand in the photo?! I need that bra! <3
I see a lot of mentions of DivaCup, and I just wanted to mention that I use Lena Cup now and much prefer it! I had DivaCup for a few years, and switched to Lena Cup 6 months ago. For my own body, it’s a much better fit! Plus Lena Cup donates way more cups to women in need (e.g. Domestic violence shelters) and uses more sustainable materials.
xo
https://lenacup.com/
Why, oh why, are you all forcing yourselves to have periods every month? You know that’s not how the human body naturally works, right?
Or maybe you don’t, because you haven’t read bestelling author Malcolm Gladwell’s excellent expose about the Pill and how it’s changed what we think is ‘natural’. (I can’t link to it, so Google ‘John Rock’s erorr’).
It’ll change your world.
Signed,
Someone who tries to have around 6-8 periods a year and is much happier for it
The documentary ‘The moon inside you’ was one of a word based things that helped me come to physical peace with my period. No pain since. Have a look at it.
Someone around here tried PERIOD PANTIES?
faut passer à la cup!!!! c’est génial!
Hey,
Great post but I am surprised that it seems you all wear tampons and nothing else. Have you tried the moon cup? I think you need a post about it. It is amazing and changed the way I live my period. First you can keep it in for 12 hours so no need to empty it when you are at work or out, second you can actually see the amount of blood you loose (I like checking it when I empty it in my shower at night – I know (!) a little bit weird but it is interesting to see the changes from one month to the other) and last but not least it is great for the environment. Bought mine 18 months ago and that’s me sorted for 10 years!! I LOVE it!
:) Laurianne xx
Yes I am with you! I have successfully converted two others in the studio to Diva Cup users. I love it so much and can’t say enough good things about it. Glad it’s working well for you, too :) xx
Hi Garance and the team! If you could do a post about the menstrual cup (coupe menstruelle en français) that would be absolutely awesome! I’m 48 and don’t need it anymore but my fifteen year old daughter uses one and I am just so jealous… like if I had had one at her age? It is just such a perfect solution for many reasons…. check it up and you will understand what I am talking about! (sorry didn’t check all the comments to see if anyone already talked about it)
xxx
Hi Eva! The menstrual cup is something that often comes up in conversation around here, I use one myself and am the biggest advocate of it so I’m constantly trying to persuade my coworkers / anyone who will listen. I’ll brainstorm the possibility of a post with the team and see what we can come up with! Thank you for the suggestion xx